


Resurrection

by Revy679



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-11
Updated: 2019-03-01
Packaged: 2019-10-26 06:22:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 59,969
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17740526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Revy679/pseuds/Revy679
Summary: This is the sequel to Departed.





	1. Chapter 1

**A/N Okay beautiful FF community, THIS story is a sequel to my requested story Departed.**

**IMPORTANT: please read Departed so you understand this story. Fear not, Departed is a one shot and a quick read. I had a few requests for this sequel and I was inspired.**

**This story was an absolute BEAST and I am convinced that it took a piece of my soul. Haha!**

**This story would not have been completed without the help, support, prodding and love of my AMAZING betas. Ninjette Twitch (Beta Extraordinaire), Beej88 (My Proof-Reader Extraordinaire) and Wings Landing (Idea Queen/GW Oracle Extraordinaire). Seriously, this would not have come to fruition without your help, love and support! Y'all rock my socks and give me life! Everyone should check out their profiles and their AWESOME stories BTW! Like for real! ;-)**

**Jonah**   **means Dove. People with this name get fame and wealth. They are often termed as a hero because of their courageous attitude.**

**I own nothing except my original characters.**

**Resurrection**

**Chapter 1**

* * *

The morning light kissed her still closed eyes, enticing her to squeeze them tightly in a futile attempt to block out mother nature's radiant wake up call. She moaned as her muscles protested to her movements, her soft supple form hitting the chiseled hard planes of her lover's back. Even with her eyes still sealed, her hands automatically wrapped around the solid body next to her. A deep groan could be heard as her petite icy hands stirred the man from his slumber. Placing her lips to his back, she felt his body tense and then relax. She knew he was awake…in more ways than one. A strong hand grasped hers and with lightning speed he had flipped over to face her. She giggled, still keeping her eyes shut, loving this little game they played in the morning. He proceeded to place butterfly kisses over her eyes, cheeks and lastly on her lips. The butterfly kiss turned to a full kiss and then a deepened kiss. Arms and legs now entwining with each other, their once soft kiss now urgent.

The cry of a little one shattered the silence as well as their moment. As a woman, she internally groaned. But as a mother, her instincts were already pulling her away. She was beyond giving him apologetic looks now; he knew what he was getting into with her and her son. She was hastily donning her robe and practically jogging to the door, taking one last glance at the gorgeous and naked green eyed pilot in her bed. The mischievous glint in his eyes, never failed to make her imagine inappropriate thoughts. She almost giggled as she disappeared from the doorway.

Quickly she made her way down the hall toward the door with the noisy little man behind it. As she swung open the wooden barrier, her heart stopped at seeing her little boy. She had accepted long ago that she would never become fully accustomed to it. It would always make her heart stop when she looked at her son…there was no mistaking his lineage. He looked just like a miniature version of his father; wild chocolate brown hair and those beautiful blue eyes, eyes that just like Heero's, seemed as if they could pierce into your soul. If not for her pale European skin color…he would have been Heero's exact replica. It was always such a sad and yet joyful moment to see her son. He was her gift, her sanity and her reason for continuing onward, but he looked so much like Heero...it was beautiful, yet painful.

Her 19-month-old, blue-eyed baby boy was chanting his favorite new word or sound…"bub, bub, bub." Even as excited as she was that he was discovering words, she still found herself missing the days when he would gurgle at her. She giggled at the memory as she now watched him trying to steady his wobbly little legs as he held onto the railings of his crib. He looked at her and her heart melted as it equally ached. She quickly picked her adorable little man up and kissed his chubby little cheeks as he thrust his favorite toy in her face. A worn, but truly loved brown teddy bear. Just another thing that tugged at her heartstrings every time she noticed it…which was all the time. He had seen it on her bed one day and refused to let it go. Like mother, like son.

She placed him on his changing table to clean him up, not the favorite part of being a mother, but a necessary part nonetheless. Once finished, she inhaled the scent of his hair. She loved it and she didn't know how much longer that new baby smell would last, so she greedily seized every opportunity. As they made their way downstairs, he clutched his teddy bear while swinging it around…but never letting it go. It was always at risk of hitting her in the face, but she had become pretty skilled at avoiding it during their morning routine.

Before she had entered the kitchen she was pleased to smell the aroma of coffee, or java as some people referred to it. She smirked at the thought. Whatever the name, it was a necessity to keep her going.

"Good Morning, Miss and Little Master."

Pagan smiled at her and her son as if they were his family. In all honesty…they really were family. Despite his working for her, she considered him so much more than just a butler. He was a key component in the business of keeping her going. He kept her home in working order and in pristine condition. He gave her trusted counsel as well as that fatherly shoulder to cry on from time to time. She honestly didn't know what she would do without him.

"Good morning, Pagan."

Jonah waved his bear as he let out an ear splitting squeal at seeing the kind elderly butler. Pagan smiled so wide; it always made Relena's heart swell. He had no family or grandchildren, and Jonah had no grandfather…they both came as close as possible to fulfilling those roles in each other's lives. It was another bittersweet moment in her life.

As Pagan took Jonah and set him up in his highchair, the previously naked Trowa emerged, now fully clothed in his Preventer uniform.

"Good morning, Mr. Barton."

Pagan spoke low with his usual respect for Relena's guest. He did not refer to him as master, as he did not officially live there…despite the fact that he was there most nights. Relena, while moving forward with her life, was not prepared to have him officially move in. It had only been four months since Trowa and Relena had started their relationship. They had managed to keep it to themselves for the first 2 months, but the last 2 months had been interesting since their friends had found out. While they wished for her to be happy again, there always seemed to be an underlying sense of discomfort, Duo being the most obvious and outspoken about the coupling. He had taken Heero's death the hardest out of all of the Gundam pilots. So, he was naturally the most opposed to the new union. It made the situation a bit difficult since Hildi and Relena were so close.

Out of respect to her husband…she shut up their bedroom and moved to another…after-all there were plenty to choose from. Honestly, it was too hard to be in that room anyway…knowing he wasn't coming back…it was too much. Regardless, she would never dream of bringing another man into her marital bed…the bed where her and Heero started their life…the bed where they conceived their son. It was too precious; too sacred.

She had, however, taken off her wedding ring 3 months ago, yet she still wore it on a chain around her neck. It was her way of keeping her first love, her husband, the father of her child and his memory close to her heart. At times, she could tell it bothered Trowa, but he never voiced it and neither did she. This was part of her healing; it's what she needed. She wasn't ready to let go, not entirely…not just yet.

"Good morning, Pagan."

Trowa spoke in his usual steady and calm tone. He grabbed his java as he moved toward where Relena was feeding Jonah. Jonah greeted him with a squeal of excitement as he clutched his teddy bear in his chubby little hand, waving it around like a flag. Trowa smirked at the antics of the little boy who looked so much like his fallen comrade and friend.

"Good morning to you as well, Jonah."

He swooped down giving Relena a quick peck on the lips that she accepted with a smile.

"Well, I am off to HQ. I'll see you all later tonight."

She watched him walk out, but was quickly pulled back to her son by his high-pitched yell. He was hungry and impatient and he would not let her forget his current demand of food. No matter what the activity, seeing those Prussian blue eyes staring back at her, she couldn't help but wonder what kind of father Heero would have been. How he would have related to having a son, how he would handled the frequent and unpredictable outbursts of a child…their child. It was a thought that both made her smile and want to cry. The fact that he would never be able to meet his son, play with him, hold him. The thought always threatened to drown her. Yet, she always managed to quickly pull herself out of the pit of despair. Instead she focused on how adorable her son was in his current attempt to get as much food into his mouth as she would allow.

She had to laugh at his attempts to fight the spoon out of her hand. Even at 19 months, he was willful and advanced. Although considering his father, she couldn't say she was too surprised. Heero would have been proud of his son's efforts at independence. She, on the other hand, needed him to remain at least a little dependent…just a little while longer.

She had been shocked, understandably, to discover that she was pregnant. Scared was another accurate descriptor, but she was thrilled as well. Of course, she didn't know how she would tell Heero, the idea made her dizzy, but ultimately, she was excited to tell him. She wasn't sure exactly how he would take it, yet she felt confident that once he noticed how happy she was with the news, he would be as well...she hoped anyway. She couldn't believe they were going to start a family. However, she never could have suspected that she would never get the chance to tell him. She never would have dreamed that her perfect soldier, her protector from the shadows, her husband wasn't coming home. She never could have fathomed that the love of her life was dead and never going to meet his son.

Once more, she shook herself out of the thought before her tears fell. She could no longer eat, instead she drank her much needed coffee as she finished feeding her little man. She then plucked him from his highchair, thanking Pagan, and took them both upstairs to get ready for their day.

* * *

**Okay, so just an FYI...this story is completely finished and I will be posting it pretty quickly. No worries lovelies...I am still working on Peace Achieved. ;-)**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you to my AMAZING betas Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and Wings Landing…y'all are my besties, betas and sanity in the rough seas of FF.**

**Thank you to all the readers and reviewers and kudos! I hope you enjoy this wild ride! Thank you again for the support!**


	2. Resurrection Chapter 2

**I own nothing except my original characters**.

* * *

Chapter 2

Relena checked herself in the mirror. She was dressed in one of her favorite pant suits, in the lightest shade of pink, adorned simply with a matching scarf around her neck. Today she left her hair down. It somehow felt liberating to allow her hair the freedom she so often felt deprived.

"Well, how do I look?" She turned to her little man. He was in his play chair, bouncing up and down excitedly swinging around the beloved teddy bear as he screeched his reply. "Well, I'll take that as a compliment," she laughed as she walked over to him and kissed the top of his head.

Once again the emotions threatened to surface, however she was saved by a gentle knocking on the door.

Pagan peeked into the room, smiling at mother and child as he carried on with his duty.

"Miss, the nanny has arrived and your car is waiting downstairs."

She smiled and nodded as she was still fighting to get a grip on her emotions. She kissed her son one more time before Pagan lifted the child from his play chair.

Once again, Relena couldn't help the happiness she felt at the way both Pagan and Jonah lit up around each other. She watched them walk away as she quickly pulled herself together, gathered her briefcase and headed out the door.

Her ride to work was her reprieve from everything. Before Jonah, she worked nonstop. Now she had adjusted her schedule around her child. She still worked hard, of course. But once she become a mother, it all became about Jonah. She felt it even stronger since Jonah had only one parent. Her time in the car once consisted of working online, returning emails and taking phone calls. Now, she used that 20-minute drive as a way to have a little time for herself. She found it was imperative to keeping her sanity.

Trowa had been a rescue ship on the stormy sea of her life. He had been instrumental at aiding her in continuing on, a true comfort in otherwise unbearable moments. But even now, there were times she just couldn't shake the feeling that she was cheating on Heero. She was informed that those feelings were normal guilt for a widow, after-all her and Heero's hearts had been so in-tune with one another. At times, she swore she could feel that Heero wasn't really gone, but that was apparently common for widows who didn't have a body to bury. Without official closure, the eternal flame of hope did not extinguish so easily. It made it especially difficult having her husband's replica to remind her of him every day.

As hectic as her job could be, she still loved it. She was honestly grateful that it kept her busy. Busy meant that she wasn't thinking about things that would suffocate her in emotion, and that was a welcome change. When she was at work, she felt almost normal again; as if she were just a girl at work, holding the world together…business as usual. For just a little while, she could pretend that things were back to normal and forget that she was a single mother and widow.

0101010101

Trowa had always been a loner. While he had never been one to actively seek out relationships, he had also not been one to turn down a genuine offer of friendship. He had decided that his first real friends had been the other pilots…in a manner of speaking. Not right away, of course, but over time and especially after the war. They had all come to find some semblance of friendship...at its most fundamental level. They were all comrades of the most unique experience. Perhaps it was derived from necessity, as they truly had no one else to relate their particular knowledge.

Since his recent relationship with Relena had begun, he noticed a shift in his comrades, as well as their significant others. Whereas they once viewed him equally, now he could see they viewed him with caution. As if helping Relena heal from her loss wasn't enough, now he had everyone he knew watching him like a hawk. Then again, he supposed this was just par for the course when you're involved with Relena. She was the symbol of peace to all of the world, and to their small circle...she was even more precious. Now, with Heero's son to raise…the stakes were even higher. Either way he felt oddly closer to Heero. He was experiencing just a hint of the pressure Heero had dealt with. It was a sobering thought. Trowa had never seen himself as a family man. Hell, he had never seen himself as a one-woman man, for that matter. But when it came to Relena, he just couldn't seem to walk away, she needed him. It was another way he was starting to understand Heero. She was mesmerizing and so completely capable of capturing a man in all that is her.

Contrary to Duo's outspoken accusations, he had absolutely not gone after Relena intentionally. He was protecting her in Heero's absence, as he had promised Heero before he left. He had gone to her that day to mourn his friend and console his friend's wife…in solely a capacity of friendship. Yes, he had kissed her in his alcohol enhanced grief, but he had not meant to do so. He certainly didn't intend things to progress to where it did. He sure as hell didn't expect to be practically living with her and posing as a type of father figure to her and Heero's son either. However, that is exactly what had happened and precisely the status of their current arrangement.

She had told him that she needed him, and they had had several intense couplings that had provided proof of her words. In the past few months, he had started to feel that he needed her as well. This had both comforted him as well as scared the hell out of him. He was surprised when she had removed her wedding ring, but happy at her effort to heal. However, seeing the ring around her neck was a constant reminder of Heero. As if he were staring at him from beyond, a constant reminder that she was  _his_  wife. It was  _his_  home and  _his_  child that he had so casually stepped in to seemingly replace.

While the ring bothered him, he wasn't sure it bothered him for the reasons he initially thought. It was something he had tried to ignore, he had wanted to ignore, but he just couldn't shake the feeling. Naturally it was a constant reminder of the man whose life it appeared he was taking over; but it truly distressed him because in the depths of his intuition, something was nagging at him. His exceptional training combined with his unparalleled insight told him that there was something he was missing. Despite his efforts, he could no longer ignore it. Instead of dwindling over time, the feeling was only increasing. So, today was the day, he would put his super sleuthing skills -as Duo once referred to it- to use.

So, now he found himself in the basement of Preventers HQ, going in through the back channels of the system, to find what...he wasn't sure? But something told him he would know it when he saw it.

010101010101

In another part of HQ, on another floor, a braided pilot made a purposeful stride toward a very specific office. Where he would normally be smiling and offering morning greetings to all who crossed his path, today he was in a rather serious mood, dare he say...a bad mood. He breezed right past the nervous young woman at the assistant's desk and didn't even bother to knock as he walked directly into the office. He didn't even realize that he was closing the door on a very shocked looking assistant.

Une didn't appear surprised. In fact, she didn't even look up from her computer screen. She had quite frankly been expecting such a visit from the braided pilot. However, she was shocked that he wasn't bombarding her with his usual verbal nonsense. That fact alone, combined with the tension now rolling off of him, was enough to let her know that he had figured out the underlying message of her request.

"Une, the past two years have been hell. Now, I know you are not the joking type, so I'm not even gonna ask if this is a joke. I realize I'm a pretty resilient guy, but a person can only take so much. So, all I'm gonna ask is…does this mean what I think it means?"

Une honestly didn't think she had ever seen the normally good natured pilot, in such a serious state. In truth, it was unsettling. His eyes held an intensity as if he were going into battle…although truth be told…he was…in a manner of speaking about to do exactly that. She, of course, had seen his intensity in battle, but in this moment, the waves of severity rolling off of him were damn near frightening. She had awakened the God of Death, ripping him from his otherwise dormant life for this one request. But they both knew, this was no ordinary request. He was being activated for a very specific reason. She knew there was no one else she could entrust with this mission, simply because she knew with absolute certainty that he wouldn't stop until it was complete…one way or another.

She took a breath to steady the nearly nervous feeling now coursing through her; a rather futile attempt to ignore the tense atmosphere currently building in her office.

"Am I correct in taking this as your acceptance of the mission, Agent Maxwell?"

He didn't blink, he stood as still as a statue until his breath moved through him to give voice to his answer.

"Absofuckinglutely."

* * *

**Don't ya just love serious Duo? Hehe!**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you to my AMAZING betas Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and Wings Landing…y'all are my besties and betas and sanity in the rough seas of FF.**

**Thank you to all of the lovely readers and reviewers and favorites and follows! I hope you enjoy this wild ride! Thank you again for the support!**


	3. Chapter 3

 

I own nothing except for my original characters.

* * *

Chapter 3

"How the hell did the two of you manage this without his knowledge?!" He screamed to the now palpable air surrounding them.

"Does it really matter?" Her voice coming out almost bored, as if she were speaking to a child.

"Don't give me that shit! You did this without his knowledge, without his consent! Wait, did you do this to all of us?!" He yelled so loud Une was grateful that her office was sound proof.

"No, Duo. We did not. Considering his status, skills and…connections, we took all precautions. Furthermore, it was not without consent. You might recall a form in your hire packet, stating that all medical procedures that are deemed necessary by your superior are performed without further consent being required." She spoke clinically and with authority.

He looked at her as if she had just grown another head.

"Are you kidding me?! I sure as hell don't remember signing that!? You know what? When this is over, I am getting checked out by an outside doctor to make sure you're not lying to me. And ya know what? If you are lying, I'm gonna be pissed. And if you aren't lying, then I'm gonna be pissed just from being insulted! Either way, I don't have time to listen to any more of this crazy! I have a mission to do. But you damn sure better believe we are not done with this little chat!" He turned and stomped out of her office in a physical show of his displeasure.

Upon his disruptive exit, and the resounding click of her door closing, she let out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding. While Duo was starting to act more like his usual self, he still held that unwavering and damn near terrifying aura that made her thankful they were no longer at odds in battle.

0101010101

He had been working for hours and hadn't come up with a damn thing. His eyes felt as if they wanted to pop out of his head. His java had worn off and now he was running on pure determination. The constant whirring of the various machines around him was starting to annoy him. He was actually surprised at that fact, normally outside stimuli didn't usually affect him. He knew he needed to take a break or else he might end one of these machines…permanently. Yeah, his usual calm demeanor was starting to slip, right along with his normally cool head. He was in desperate need of a break.

Just walking out of the room seemed to calm him somewhat, but nothing he did made that damn nagging feeling go away, it didn't even lessen for that matter. He had decided to go to the roof. He needed to steer clear of as many people as possible right now. He wasn't technically supposed to be down in the basement…not all day.

Fortunately, he had grabbed the service elevator and it was clear, so he took it straight to the top of the building. He had to clear his head, to regroup, and to get away from that fucking screen.

As the elevator doors opened, announcing his arrival at the roof, he heard voices at the end of the hall. Walking off of the elevator he realized those voices were headed in the same direction he was going. Then he realized he knew one of those voices…it was Duo.  _What the hell was he doing here?_  He had been back on his colony last he checked. With as much shit as the long haired pilot gave him, he had always made a point to know exactly when the braided nuisance would be back gracing him with his judgement and annoyance.

Automatically, Trowa went into stealth mode, moving along the hallway while keeping his ears alert for any information that might answer his question.

"Agent Maxwell, Sir, your transport to space has been acquired. The helicopter is waiting to take you to the shuttle."

"Good, thanks! The sooner I get this started, the quicker I can finish and get things back to normal."

The two men exited through the door that led to the roof. The loud click of the door confirmed it had shut, leaving Trowa alone to wonder what the hell Duo had meant by getting things back to normal? That uneasy feeling that Trowa couldn't get rid of seemed to act up again at the thought of that question.

He stepped outside onto the roof. The wind was whipping due to the power of the helicopter blades picking up speed. As Trowa watched it lift off of the roof, a pair of amethyst eyes locked onto his. Duo was staring at him as if he could see right through him. It was a look Trowa had only ever seen on Duo when he was about to win a battle. The raw ferocity in that one look sent a chill down his spine. He could tell by that one look that Duo had been aware he was trailing him in the hall, and that he had heard what he said. Like a lightning bolt, Trowa knew Duo had wanted him to hear his words. That bad feeling flared up again with a vengeance.

Moving before his brain could process the change. He was practically running back to the elevator. If Duo was here, it was as a special request from Une. He had been looking in the wrong place, but he knew what to look for now. He just couldn't help but feel as if he were racing against the clock. Hacking Une's personal files undetected wouldn't be easy, but it wouldn't be impossible either. Regardless, he had his work cut out for him.

0101010101

Relena sat at her oversized, solid wood desk, cooing into the phone at her adorable and silly little man. She always made sure to have a video call with him on her lunch break. It was the working mom guilt; part of her wanted to be home whereas the other part of her wanted to be exactly where she sat. But when she would look at his sweet little face, eating his lunch as the nanny diligently attempted to feed him, she found herself resisting the urge to rush right back home.

Currently, she found herself making airplane noises with the salad on the end of her fork in an effort to demonstrate to her son that eating could be fun. She knew how ridiculous it was, but that was just what moms did and in that moment, she was just grateful that she had a private office.

Much to her chagrin, her call with her son was going to be cut short due to another incoming call.

"Bridgett, I will call you back. I have another call."

"Yes, Miss." The nanny told Jonah to wave to mommy, but all he managed to do was knock the bowl of peas off of his highchair tray.

Relena had to hold back a laugh as she schooled her features to exhibit the appropriate look to Bridgett, now that she had a mess to clean.

"Sorry Bridgett. Bye, bye, my little man. Mommy loves you so very much." She blew a kiss before disconnecting and then hitting the button to reconnect to the new call.

As the video screen cleared, she saw Hildi in the frame and the look on her face brought a sudden feeling of panic to Relena.

"Hildi! Are you alright?!"

"I…I really don't know, Relena? I need to ask you, why was Duo called in today?"

This information was news to Relena, not to mention a shock.

"Hildi…what do you mean? I wasn't informed that he was called in today? I honestly have no idea."

The look of worry on Hildi's face instantly turned into one of pure panic.

"Oh, Relena! That is exactly what I hoped you wouldn't say! I was afraid you really might not know!" The tears started rolling down Hildi's cheeks and at the sight, Relena was tempted to join her. The sheer concern and fear she could feel coming off of Hildi was overwhelming.

Relena composed herself, using her usual political persona to save herself from crying as well.

"Hildi, please tell me what is happening? I can't help unless I am aware of all of the facts."

"That just it! I don't know!? He got the call last night. He was so serious and almost angry…I've never really seen him this way Relena. It really freaked me out."

The thought of a serious Duo was honestly an unsettling idea. She could certainly see why Hildi was so upset. But her getting upset as well wouldn't help anything right now. She may not know anything at the moment, but she knew where she could acquire some answers.

"Hildi, I need to go pay a visit to someone. I will call you back. Try to relax, though. You shouldn't be so upset. It's not good for your pregnancy. I will call you when I know something."

Hildi nodded, too emotional to speak. Thankfully, she at least appeared to be calming down

Relena gave her a reassuring look before disconnecting the call.

So much for lunch, she thought. She put the lid back on her salad, stood up, donned her suit jacket and started to make her way to the only person that could give her answers.

For the second time today, another person, this time the Vice Foreign Minister, swept right past her directly into her boss' office. It was enough to make a girl feel invisible and not the best at her job.

Normally, Relena would stop and make small talk with the petite assistant, but today she truly felt as if she did not have the time. She had no words for anyone except for the one beyond the door.

"Une, I need to speak with you."

The words left no room for argument, nor did they imply that it was a request.

Une was starting to feel as if perhaps she might be losing her edge.

Taking in the visage of the Vice Foreign Minister, standing in her office in a stance of reserved defiance, it struck her in that moment just how much Relena reminded her of a less than cordial perfect soldier. The thought struck the tiniest amount of fear into her heart as her thoughts got away from her. She wasn't ready to deal with this. In all honesty, she didn't know how to answer the question she feared would cross the young woman's lips.

Une steeled herself, straightening in her seat as she leveled her gaze at the blond woman before her, preparing herself for the upcoming battle of words.

* * *

**Thank you, thank you, thank you to my AMAZING betas Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and Wings Landing…y'all are my besties and betas and sanity in the rough seas of FF.**

**Thank you to all of the lovely readers and reviewers and favorites and follows! I hope you enjoy this wild ride! Thank you again for the support!**


	4. Chapter 4

 

**I own nothing but not original characters.**

**A/N Since everyone is so excited, here's another chapter for you all. It's gonna get wild. Teehee!**

* * *

Chapter 4

The Vice Foreign Minister and the Commander stared at one another for what felt like hours, in reality it was merely seconds. Once again, the tension in her office began to build. Relena had taken a seat in the chair in front of the desk and arranged herself to mirror Une's position. They were facing off, two powerful women with two very different styles. Only one of those women had any answers at the moment and the other woman was in need of those answers.

"Okay, Une. I am willing to wager that you at least have an idea as to why I am here?"

Relena was in no mood to mince words today.

"Really? Just exactly what and how much are you willing to wager?" The wisp of a smile on the Commander's face told Relena that she was joking. A joke from Une was not a usual occurrence by any stretch of the imagination, and while jokes are usually intended to lighten the mood…a joke from the Commander seemed to have the opposite effect.

It struck Relena as nearly comical considering Hildi had mentioned Duo was being serious and now Une was practically joking. Had they switched personalities? Had the world gone mad? Or was Une finally softening?

However, just as soon as that smile had appeared, it dissolved even quicker, taking Relena's hope right along with it. She steeled herself, preparing for the worst. In all honesty, she truly had no idea what the hell was going on.

Une peered at the blond sitting across from her. The young woman had been through war, found love, lost love, and was now raising a child on her own, all while trying to keep the entire world at peace. It was a tall order for anyone, let alone a single mother and widow of nearly 21.

Une never considered herself a sentimental women. Or perhaps no one else had ever considered her that way, therefore she adopted the idea herself. But over the years she had come to greatly admire and respect Relena and in her own way…protect her. The absolute last thing she wanted to do was hurt Relena, but here she was, about to speak the very words that would do exactly that.

Relena braced herself for something crazy. In her job, and being around Gundam pilots had often times been an exercise in crazy. She was here to talk about Duo and Duo could certainly create insane situations. Regardless, she was determined to help put Hildi's mind at ease. After-all, she herself had firsthand knowledge of how bad extra emotional strain could be on a pregnant woman. She shuddered at the memories of her own ordeal.

As Une watched the VFM, she realized there was another reason she could be in her office. Duo was here and when he was on the premises, everyone usually knew about it. Duo was not a subtle man, despite being a master of stealth. He only exhibited that skill when he had to, usually when his life was at stake. But other times, it was as if he were going out of his way to show the exact opposite of his abilities. Of course, she had to admit that it was smart. After-all, who would think a loudmouth guy like that would be a master of stealth? She could have chuckled to at the sheer genius of their resident idiot savant.

Une finally seemed to come out of the thoughts that had been preventing her from speaking. She took a very deep breath, both to steady her resolve and to buy her another precious moment. She locked eyes with the Vice Foreign Minister, and couldn't help but notice the worry in those crystalline blue orbs. Une was certain that even  _her_ eyes reflected some of that worry back as well.

0101010101

He had been diligently searching, now that he knew where to look. It had made it both more difficult and easier at the same time. The files were hidden deep within the mainframe and if one didn't know what to look for, they'd miss it. Hell, he damn near missed it himself. However, the code kept rewriting itself every damn time he cracked it. It was enough to make him want to yank out his perfectly placed bangs. He was just about to give up until he decided to try one last ditch effort…he figured it wouldn't work, but he would try it anyway. As he was about to stand to leave, the system screen went all green and the previously unattainable *ACCESS GRANTED* flashed victoriously across the screen.

For just a moment he thought his eyes were playing tricks on him. He couldn't believe his stupid little trick had worked. The file opened and his eyes were stuck on the words...words he had both searched for and feared. The words that held both her happiness and his demise. The words that could change everything.

He couldn't control how fast his eyes and mind worked together to relay the earth shattering information, soaking it all in like a sponge…whether he wanted to or not.

His heart pounded, his head hurt, and was he sweating? His hands didn't seem to be following his commands. All he managed to do was sweep over the shocking words in the file that could ultimately spell his end.

How the hell did this happen? How was this possible? How the fuck was no one ever informed? The questions were accumulating in his mind like noise from a crowd that just continued to get louder and louder until you thought you'd go insane. Yes, insane…maybe that's what was happening? Perhaps his mind had finally snapped?

No, it was just her, her and him and their current...situation.

He had done something he'd never done before...he had let someone in…he had let her in and he had gotten lost. Although in this moment, he felt as if he were in a black fucking hole. If this information turned out to be true…he shook his head…he couldn't think about it any longer, his mind literally felt as if it were about to cave in on itself.

He needed to leave, needed to get out of here, out of the building…hell, at this very second, he found himself wanting to flee into the emptiness of space that had soothed his troubled soul so many times in the past. But this time was different. It wasn't just about him…he wouldn't leave Relena or Jonah. Hell, this could be bad information, it might not be true. Yet, if it were true, he accepted that he would certainly be at a definite disadvantage, or more accurately...fighting a losing battle entirely.

He found his head bowing as his hands closed the file, allowing it to fall back into its hidden place as he shut the computer down. The uneasy feeling that tugged at his soul was now laced with the unmistakable feeling of defeat. He had never handled those feelings too well. This was one of the reasons he preferred to be single. Single was easy, single was less complicated. Now, it was extremely complicated and confusing. Regardless, he knew that the real problems hadn't even begun.

As he walked down the hall, he was lost in his thoughts and trying not to let his bewilderment completely overtake him. Then like a light bulb switching on...the pieces fell into place, creating a rather disturbing picture. He now knew why Duo so pointedly aimed that look at him as he flew away, and why he said that things would go back to normal. He understood why Duo had been called. That unholy sinking sensation returned. He knew exactly what Duo's mission was now.

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There really wasn't many times Une could recall being so unprepared. She prided herself on the exact opposite. But right now, she was anything  _but_ prepared. Truthfully, she just wasn't ready to tell her...not just yet. She wanted to tell her everything and yet, she didn't want to say a word. This was a highly unusual situation that would prove to have unique ramifications…to say the least.

She had been ready to tell her, but then realized the best course of action was to wait and make sure Duo came through. The young woman had been through so much. Why put her through more if she wasn't 100% certain?

So, putting on her best militaristic demeanor, she switched gears and decided to just inform her about Duo's presence. She knew that's why she was here and anything else just wasn't pertinent…at this time.

"While it is understandable you would be surprised at Duo's appearance, I fail to see why that should prompt you to barge into my office demanding answers."

Relena's facial features fell from the severe look it held since she had entered the office. She was shocked and now, she was angry.

Une smirked internally. This was what she needed. Get her mad. Distract from anything deeper than Duo just being on a mission.

Relena was shaken and a bit upset at Une's obvious change in attitude. One minute she seemed ready to talk and now, she was pissing her off. Then she realized that the good Commander was intentionally angering her. She was trying to throw her off the trail…the trail of what, she didn't know? Duo's presence here can't possibly be so top secret that she can't even be informed of at least the basics.

"Commander, my dear friend Hildi, Duo's wife…Duo's very pregnant wife, is worried. Why is Duo here, especially so close to her due date? It's not exactly comforting to his wife and my friend." She was tired of this game; hell, she was just plain tired. She had other things to do and she honestly just needed an answer for Hildi.

"You, as well as Hildi, are aware that Duo is a contractor and he is called in when his particular skill set is necessary."

"Yes, we ARE aware. But the issue is that he was acting strangely; very serious."

"Vice Minister, you know that I am not at liberty to release specific parameters of any mission."

"Yes, I am also aware of that as well, Commander." She sighed outwardly, growing weary as she started to feel like she was being given the runaround.

Une could see that she was starting to run the young woman down. She didn't like doing it, but if a little frustration was the cost of sparing her unnecessary pain, she'd take it. She knew the VFM was tired because normally when they did this, the young woman would be putting up more of a fight. Honestly, that was a small gift to her in this moment. She needed all the help she could get right now.

Taking a deep breath, the leader of the Preventers collected her thoughts.

"Relena, As I previously stated, he is here for a specific mission of which his skills are required. As for his serious attitude toward it…" she really hated to do this, but that in itself showed her progress since the war. There was a time she would never even think to show remorse, let alone actually feel it.

"Did it ever occur to you or Hildi that he is upset because he is being called out so close to Hildi's due date?"

Relena's eyes grew wide as she processed the information, yet somewhere, in the back of her mind, she didn't fully believe Une's explanation.

The Commander decided to go one step further and tell one more half truth. Letting an exasperated sigh leave her lips for effect.

"We had assured Duo that we would not call him back until after the baby was born, but this just simply could not be avoided."

Relena could not believe it had been this simple. Then again, it did make sense why he would be so upset. However, why, then, would Hildi not already know this? Her brain finally stopped all incessant questions as she realized that those answers would only be found between Duo and Hildi. She had come here for answers and she accomplished that task. She would call Hildi, and then she would go home early. She felt as if she had worked herself up for nothing. She was so mentally exhausted in this moment.

Relena sighed in frustration as well as relief.

"Thank you for your time." She promptly walked out without another word. Unaware to Relena, she was leaving a guilty Une at her desk to ponder the next part of this sordid affair. The Commander sincerely didn't know how the hell she was going to tell Relena.

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**Can you feel that? The excrement is about to hit the fan. Haha! Stay tuned!**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you to my AMAZING betas Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and Wings Landing…y'all are my besties and betas and sanity in the rough seas of FF.**

**Thank you to all of the lovely readers and reviewers and favorites and follows! I hope you enjoy this wild ride! Thank you again for the support!**


	5. Chapter 5

 

**I own nothing but my original characters.**

**A/N Watch with me as the storm clouds gather on the horizon. Bruhaha!**

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Chapter 5

Relena had called Hildi to pass along the information Une had provided. The very pregnant woman was grateful to have any answers. She once again cried, but this time they were at least tears of relief.

After the emotional call, the Vice Foreign Minister decided to go home. She was exhausted today and right now, all she wanted to do was to see her little man.

While she was relieved to be out of the office, as she neared closer to her home, she felt an anxiousness rise within her that she couldn't quite explain. But as soon as she walked through the door and heard the excited squeal of her little man, all other thoughts disappeared. She was holding him and kissing his chubby cheeks within seconds.

"Hello, my darling. Have you been a good boy for Bridgett today?"

"Ma…ma…ma…mmmama!" He happily replied in his adorable little speech. He was able to say a few words. He just reserved them for moments he deemed worthy. Another way he was like his father.

She greeted Pagan, relieved Bridgett for the day and headed upstairs to get comfortable so they could enjoy some quality time together.

The rest of her day had been so pleasant, dinner time came too quickly. Her little man was not shy around food. He loved to eat and wasn't terribly picky either. It did shock her and yet didn't shock her…after-all, his father was never picky either. It was a trait she knew Heero would have been pleased about. She believed their son received that trait from him. Or maybe she just liked to think that he did. Jonah enjoyed smashing his food and then eating it, a habit taught to him by Duo because he thought it was hilarious. The thought irritated her as much as it made her chuckle.

After they had both had their evening meal, she took them upstairs and gave her little man a much needed bath. It was part of their evening ritual and she thoroughly enjoyed the time with him. He truly was a happy baby; a fact she was most grateful for as she watched him splash all around the tub in excited joy. He had even splashed her a couple of times, but she just laughed right along with him. His little laugh was infectious and made her heart swell with love.

After the bath, she rocked him to sleep as she read him a story. She couldn't get enough of these moments as her precious baby boy snuggled into her arms and slowly fell off to dreamland. It was times like these when she envied him; so innocent and happy, so pure and untouched by the harsh realities of life…so blissfully unaware.

As she placed his tiny sleeping form carefully into his crib and quietly backed out of his room, she eased the door shut as quietly as possible. She then hastily moved back to her room…she was a little excited because now, she got to take a shower.

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He was in his car, clutching the steering wheel, just looking at the palace, Relena's residence, where he'd been unofficially living for the past few months. He knew it was more than likely his imagination, but he felt as if the prestigious manor was mocking him. He had been sitting there for at least an hour now, trying to decide what to do. He had just sat in the parking lot at work doing the same thing, before he came here to continue the act. When he had ended his search, he had sent a text to Relena to let her know he would be "working" much later tonight. She didn't seem to mind, a fact that brought slight irritation, but to his surprise… mostly relief.

His primary issue was the knowledge he now knew and whether or not to tell her. Of course he wanted to tell her. But then what if it's not true? Why the hell would he tell her if it could hurt her, send her back into depression and just bring her misery? If it turned out to not be true, then it would all have been for nothing.

Perhaps it was genuine concern for her mental state, her emotions and her heart…or perhaps it was his own selfish reasons. Either way, he had made his decision. With a new sense of purpose and determination, he exited the car and walked toward the front door. As he made his way upstairs, he was hit with a feeling of urgency, as if his time was running out. His legs taking the stairs two at a time, racing to the bedroom, he felt almost frantic to get to her. When he entered the bedroom and didn't see her anywhere, he was alarmed. Then he heard the shower running.

The hot water soothed the tension in her neck, shoulders and back…it was one of life's little pleasures. Being lost to the wonderful sensations, she was slightly startled when she felt large, strong hands envelope her body. An involuntary moan escaping her lips in approval.

"Mmmm, hello," she chuckled through her words.

"I was hoping we could finish what we started this morning?"

She responded with a searing kiss that encouraged him to take her up against the shower wall. This was also a pretty damn good tension reliever, she thought with a giggle.

0101010101

He had been flying for hours and was so ready to dock, determine if his target was here, get in and get the hell out and back home. Hildi was so close to her due date and he could not miss the birth of their child. The crestfallen look she wore when he told her he had to leave was haunting his memories. It clawed at his heart and he almost didn't leave. He wanted to explain so badly, but he knew that wasn't an option. Besides, if this turned out to be a dead end, he couldn't risk putting her in that position with her best friend. He should be the only one to carry this burden. This was just something that had to be done. It was the only thing that could tear him away from Hildi right now, but if there was even a slight chance…he had to know or it would eat away at him for the rest of his life. Besides, he'd be damned if he entrusted this to anyone else. He had a debt to repay…he had to be the one to make this right.

The signal was coming from an abandoned colony, a colony that all government agencies had considered closed due to being inoperable beyond all repairs. Duo had only passed by this burnt out shell of a colony a handful of times on various trips, and that was the extent of his knowledge on this widely referred to piece of space junk. It never occurred to him that anyone would be on it…mainly because it had been reported that the colony could not sustain life.

He shook his head in disbelief…if anyone could… "Damn," Duo breathed out the word as he almost chuckled at the insanity of it all.

Docking the ship at the old and dilapidated port was a feat within itself. At times Duo amazed himself with his ingenuity. If he hadn't been so focused on his mission, he would have been laughing like a madman. Regardless, even if he had laughed, his space helmet would have muffled his laugh before it was completely lost to the void of space. It didn't matter though since no sign of life was detected. No one appeared to be here.

Despite the colony being deserted, as soon as his feet touched the platform, he was hit with an overwhelming feeling that he was not alone. Now a familiar smirk graced his lips. He didn't know if what he felt was real or just wishful thinking, but he knew he wasn't leaving until he found out.

The master of stealth always found it more taxing on his skills when in a space suit, but it wasn't impossible. He found his way into the first door that allowed access to the walkway leading to the main entrance of the colony. No lights and no whirring of the main engine providing artificial air…it was downright eerie. Despite the creep factor, Duo wasn't feeling threatened or even as if he were in danger. Even being on high alert as he was, he felt as if he were not so much hunting, but being drawn in or led somewhere…of course, all of this very well could have been in his head. Zero gravity and the post-apocalyptic feel of this empty colony was very likely messing with his brain. While there was always the possibility of a trap, the feeling of apprehension that normally came with that was curiously absent. Although, that fact alone only served to further backup his suspicions.

In space, the debris left behind from humans was considerable. Even in the abandoned colony, the forgotten pieces of everyday humanity littered the floors. Chairs, tables, wires hanging haphazardly from walls and ceilings…if there were zombies, the picture would have been complete.

He knew time was running out. And not just with Hildi about to pop, but also with the signal they had received. It had only started transmission yesterday, but the signal was getting slower, indicating that time was ticking down. Of course, the sender wasn't aware of that signal. Duo shook his head; he still couldn't believe what Une had done. Okay, in this moment it was coming in useful. But he didn't feel that it was entirely ethical. The thought surprised him. After everything he had witnessed and participated in throughout the war, yet here he managed to keep some semblance of morals and ethics. He smiled at the thought... perhaps he wasn't as far gone as he had once believed.

0101010101

She was standing in her garden; the sun was being detained by clouds. Suddenly, the wind picked up and a fog rolled in, bringing an icy chill with it. She attempted to see through the haze, but it was too thick, and her sense of direction was hopeless. She heard footsteps. They were heavy, those of a man's footfalls. They advanced toward her and she froze. No…it…couldn't be.

In a flash he stood before her. The ghostly figure spoke in the low and steady voice she knew better than her own.

"Relena."

She bolted straight up in her bed, clutching at her chest, trying to find her breath and attempt to control her gasps as they mixed with her desperate sobs. The tears ran free, falling onto her hands, nightgown and comforter. She didn't even realize that Trowa had awoken and was attempting to console her.

Whereas normally she would revel in his comfort, this time she was having to fight the urge to push his hands away.

"Relena? Relena, what happened?" He asked softly but urgently.

"I…I…just dreamed of…" She couldn't finish, but he knew what she was going to say. "Trowa, I haven't dreamed like that recently…and this was a completely new dream...so…real"

Panic shot through Trowa like lightning and he was now having to fight to control his reactions to her words. Instead he pulled her close, and he couldn't help but notice the slightest resistance in her body language. That alone did nothing to repress the raging fears coursing through him.

As she seemed to be calming somewhat, she just as quickly pulled away from him.

"I...I need to go check on Jonah."

Trowa knew his face showed disappointment before he could stop it. He was currently feeling indebted to the lack of light that covered them both in this moment.

He knew when she was upset like this, she only wanted to be with her son. This had happened so frequently that her son's room held a full size bed as Relena had taken to sleeping next to her son on more nights than one could count.

He was scared, worried, and he felt as if his resolve were cracking, of course his outward appearance showed nothing but acceptance and understanding as he silently nodded his head in response.

As he watched her leave, Duo's words came rushing back to the forefront of his mind like a tsunami.

" _You're just kidding yourself man. It's always been him; it will ALWAYS be him! If he came back tomorrow or 10 years from now, she would still choose him. How the hell do you not get that?!"_

0101010101

She had been standing at Jonah's crib now for several minutes. She just couldn't avert her eyes from the little replica of the man who had taken her heart even before she had realized it. She wanted to pull him into her arms so badly it hurt. She just wanted to feel his warmth in the only piece she still had left of him. But the mom in her overrode her pain. She wouldn't wake him just to watch his mother cry. The tears wouldn't stop; they silently fell as she slid down to the floor. She clung to the railing of Jonah's crib as if letting go would somehow make her lose her grip on her sanity. She couldn't get that dream out of her head; it shocked her heart and left a mark on her soul...it felt so real. She heard his voice so clearly. It was as if her heart were crying out. She grasped the ring on the chain around her neck as if it might ease her misery. All she could do was silently sob, realizing that this was going to be another night when her tears would carry her into unconsciousness.

0101010101

He had checked so many rooms and opened so many doors he felt like he was in a life size advent calendar with no prize. He was getting frustrated, and damn near jittery. The signal was weaker now, but still transmitting. He honestly didn't know if this was real, a fluke, or just a joke. He only knew that he needed to keep moving; every second he wasted was another opportunity gone.

He walked up to yet another nondescript regular looking door and went to open it, ready to see the same as every other room…nothing. Yet, he noticed medical equipment floating around and gurneys attached to the floor and bolted to the walls. The room was much larger and went further back than most of the previous rooms he had searched, so he entered, making sure to be cautious of any sharp objects that might be loose.

As he floated toward the back of the room, he came across another door. As his hands went to turn the knob, the handle did not move; it was locked. This immediately sent his senses reeling, thinking that possibly someone was behind that door. His heart was racing right along with his adrenaline as his mind started to get ahead of itself. He needed to first get through this door. He began to pick the lock…even in his spacesuit, he was pleased with himself at how effortlessly he could unlock the door.

The blockade finally gave way to a cavernous dark room that appeared to have a desk and shelves and…Duo saw movement to his right. As he braced himself to attack, he turned and realized the movement was a spacesuit floating around. Just as quickly, he realized that there was a body in that space suit. He quickly grabbed ahold of it, bringing it down to him as he prepared to look at whatever sight presented itself. He really wasn't expecting what he saw.

Peering through the window of the space suit helmet, he saw a man with a beard and long dark hair. He could tell by the faint breathing that the man was still alive. Then the man groaned.

"Hey, hey buddy…are you awake? How the hell are you here by yourself? Can you tell me if anyone else is here?"

As Duo rattled off his questions, the man stirred.

"Sh…shut up, Duo."

"HEERO!?"

* * *

**It's about to crazy! Bruhaha!**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you to my AMAZING betas Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and Wings Landing…y'all are my besties and betas and sanity in the rough seas of FF.**

**Thank you to all of the lovely readers and reviewers and favorites and follows! I hope you enjoy this wild ride! Thank you again for the support!**


	6. Chapter 6

**I own nothing except for my characters.**  

* * *

 

Chapter 6

She was brought out of her troubled sleep by the sound of her giggling baby boy. Under the cover of night, she had been lost to her pain, so paralyzed by fear, she hadn't made it to the spare bed in Jonah's room. She had fallen asleep right on the floor by his crib. More accurately…she cried herself to sleep. In that moment, she was just thankful that her son was too young to understand or remember such things. Pulling herself together, she stood and immediately pulled him from his crib. She desperately needed to hold him, hug him, kiss him and just have this mother/son moment.

His happy little chant…"bub, bub, bub"…let her know he wanted to eat. His sweet little face, hands and small frame held such life and vitality…it decimated her heart as much as it flooded it with joy. The ever present contradiction never ceased its threat to carry her away in a deluge of emotion. This was her constant battle; a heart divided…half love and half misery.

Today felt as if there were a haze covering the atmosphere. This day felt different somehow. The good cry she experienced the previous night was therapeutic. Even still, something tugged at the edges of her heart. No…more like throbbed. She couldn't rid herself of the feeling that something was on the very near horizon. Could the pain now be transitioning into something more? Something different? Maybe today was a new day. Perhaps this was the grand final cry, the conclusive dream, like a horrific parting gift, courtesy of the cosmos. Yes, that is what she decided. She would choose to have a good day. She couldn't keep living this way. Her heart had a hole in it, this was an inevitable truth. She would have to learn to live with it for the rest of her life.

The morning routine was in full swing when Trowa emerged in the kitchen. His body language was guarded. His eyes held caution and the slightest hint of fear. She walked right up to him, hugged him and kissed his lips. He stood there for a moment, seemingly unsure of what to do…then his arms slowly came up to embrace her. She could feel the tension rolling off of him in waves. He was clearly fearful that what had happened last night would change their arrangement. Their fledgling relationship was still so very fragile. She squeezed him tighter and he finally relaxed. No words were spoken, just like another certain soldier…he didn't require words. They were okay. She was okay. She would be okay...eventually.

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No matter how many times he visited, the vast expanse of space was something he would never be able to comprehend. It was a mystery, not unlike a woman…or the man passed out behind him for that matter.

Getting out of the abandoned colony shouldn't have been difficult, but it really wasn't easy. By the time Duo had found his resurrected friend…Heero passed out.

Even in zero gravity, navigating through the burnt out colony, and trying to keep the dead weight your lugging from floating into walls, is not as effortless as one might imagine. Once they had finally made it back to the ship, he strapped Heero on the bed onboard and got the hell out of that haunted looking piece of space debris.

It was a thrilling yet terrifying feeling to find Heero and know that he didn't die after-all. In this moment, Duo found himself thinking about Trowa. He had tried to tell Trowa not to pursue Relena and now this was a total fucking mess. All he knew...he sure as hell wasn't going to be the one to tell the ultimate killing machine that his supposed friend hooked up with his wife.

Then his guilt resurfaced…what about his role in all of this? Would Heero be pissed that he didn't stop Trowa by any means necessary? Either way, he felt like he let his best buddy down. Heero didn't even know that he was a father. So much to come back to and there was no telling how the perfect soldier would take the news. Then there was the state Duo found him in...so rundown, so completely unlike him. There was no telling what had happened in the last two years. What the hell took the perfect soldier out for nearly two and half years? The answers were horrifying to contemplate. Not to mention the state of mind the man could be in after his hiatus from life. The mere thought sent a shiver through him that was colder than space itself.

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Une's nerves had not been on edge like this since the war. She was snapping at people for no reason. Coffee made her feel like she was going to leap out of her skin. She literally jumped every time her phone rang. She was just grateful that Mariemaia's boarding school was still in session. She didn't know how the hell she'd explain her odd behavior if the girl was home. Of course she knew the reason, but that didn't mean she could divulge the reason. It was all classified information.

Even with the time to think, she still didn't know how the hell she was going to tell Relena. This was truly a situation where the result would actually be what lies on both sides of the coin...not just one. It would be both happy and heartbreaking, mostly for Relena and Heero. Trowa would be collateral damage and that was unavoidable, but that was the best case scenario. Although, in all honesty, Une couldn't feel too bad for Trowa, getting involved with Relena wasn't the smartest move in the first place. Once Heero found out, there wouldn't be a place in the universe that Trowa could hide.

Une was sitting at her desk, staring at nothing, both wishing for her phone to ring and dreading it. As if on cue, her phone released a shrill beeping noise and something in her gut told her who was on the other end of that ring. Had she not been a stronger person, her hand would have been shaking as she pressed the receive icon on the touchscreen.

The braided pilot's face came into view and he once again had that look etched onto his features. Her instincts already telling her the answer to the only question that mattered. She already knew.

His eyes were hard, his jaw was set and once more, she was struck by just how fierce this usually jovial man could be. He didn't mince words. He was clearly not in the mood for chit chat.

"The package has been located and secured. Docking within 10 minutes. Have a medical team on standby."

The screen went black before she could make a sound. She knew from the brevity of his call, he was still pissed. Frankly, in all honesty, she was mad at herself as well.

It was time, the moment of truth…in more ways than one. She knew she couldn't wait any longer. She had to tell her. Now.

0101010101

Her day was one of those days when the stars aligned and everything just went according to plan. She was actually feeling pretty decent today. Considering her hellish night, she was surprised, but grateful. Delegates were cooperating, her lunch didn't

have to be sent back, and all of her meetings started, as well as ended, on time. She only wished all of her days could run so smoothly.

She was just about to call it day and head home when her office phone rang for the umpteenth time that day. She absentmindedly answered as she finished looking through her final proposal for the day.

"Yes?"

"Relena, I'm glad I caught you before you left."

"Une, hello. Yes, I was wrapping up and just about to leave for the day."

"Relena…I need you to come to my office."

Finally looking up at the screen, she noticed the grave look on the woman's face.

"Une, are you feeling well? You look pale."

"Relena, please…you need to come to my office…right away."

The screen went black.

All of sudden the terrifying feelings from her dream last night came rushing back. She currently had the overwhelming urge to cry and laugh like a crazy person. Were her hands shaking? The onslaught of emotions hitting her now were unsubstantiated. She didn't know what was happening, but she knew she needed to pull it together.

Une was not a woman who fancied the dramatic, but at times, problems that were bigger to her and only her could cause her to adopt a rather dire demeanor. Relena figured this was her brain attempting to rationalize the bubble of dread now swelling within her.

She quickly gathered her wits and belongings and closed up her office. The closer she came to Une's domain, it felt as if her steps became heavier. Yet in some ways, her heart seemed to become lighter. She very nearly felt dizzy. She truly had not experienced such a sensation.

Her emotions felt like they were in a fucking blender. She felt lightheaded by the time she made it to Une's door. The business day was complete and the receptionist was already gone. Relena was so lost in thought, she didn't even knock. The door had been her temporary support as she swung in on its trajectory on the way into the room.

Upon seeing The Commander's face, Relena realized that the woman was even paler than depicted in the video call. She seemed almost startled to see the Vice Foreign Minister. That was cause for alarm within itself, considering Une did call her to her office. That feeling of intense unease exploded and throbbed now. Her pulse sped up against her will and her heart started to race. The tension in the room was unbearable.

"Relena, please…do come in." Une spoke slowly, in a measured tone that did absolutely nothing to allay the fears now surging through her.

She didn't remember when she had made it to the chair, but she was now sitting across from a very somber looking Une. Relena found her voice was caught somewhere between her desire to speak and her lack of ability to do so. She watched as the Commander seemed to struggle with her own inner battle…as if she too were warring with her own ability to speak.

With every second that ticked by, the tension mounted. The air in the room was so heavy, if it possessed flavor, she would have been able to taste it.

Une shouldn't have been surprised that the young woman had been prompt. Yet, seeing her there, alive in the flesh, brought it all crashing down. Her carefully constructed plan just shattered around her. All she could do now was minimize the damage and try to avoid as much of the falling debris as possible.

"Thank you for coming. I am afraid I have some rather shocking news. I know you will have questions and I promise you that I will provide you with the answers. I feel I must preface this by stating that this has come as a surprise to us as well. Please know, we only just found out ourselves, but we had to be certain before releasing the information…even to you." The last part was nearly mumbled.

"Commander, what is this about? What exactly are you referring to?"

Even in the darkest recesses of her mind, she could not begin to fathom or prepare herself for the words that were about to fall from the Commander's lips.

Une took a deep breath, in hopes that it would somehow steady her nerves…it did not.

"Rel…Relena, there is truly no good way to tell you this, so I will just say it. Your…your husband…Heero is alive."

The words logically made sense, but her brain couldn't process them. Her heart felt as if it had been shocked with a million volts of electricity. This couldn't be true. He'd been gone for over two years. No word, no communication, no signs of life. She felt as if she were falling, and if she hadn't been sitting in a chair, she knew her legs would not have supported her weight. She was full blown shaking now, her breaths coming quick, too quick. Her vision was getting blurry. In this moment, she felt like crawling into a hole to hide or just sleep forever. Her mind felt like it was collapsing, or maybe that was just her heart.

"Princess…Princess…come on, Princess. Come back to us."

She heard him…at least she thought she heard him. She knew she heard someone. She felt a gentle grasp on her shoulders and she started to come outside of herself.

"Princess, hey…"

"D…Du…Duo?"

She saw the braided pilot before her. He was the one grasping her shoulders.

"Hey there, beautiful," he said with his usual jovial tone. But his eyes were full of concern.

Finally, her brain was starting to function once more. She held the now serious gaze the former Gundam pilot returned to her. There was relief, anger, pain and love in that one look, not only for each other, but also for the man who had just returned back from the dead. She could have sworn she saw tears in his eyes.

"I…I…Is…it true…Duo?" She managed to choke out through her emotion.

He couldn't speak, all he could do was nod his head yes.

She flew into his arms, sobbing like a newborn. He was barely holding back his own tears as he held his best friend's wife.

"D…Duo!?" She pulled away from him. His name alone was a question of his presence, but she spoke too fast for him to respond.

"T...That's why you came here?!" Her eyes grew wide as Une's strange actions during their impromptu meeting now fell into place. She found her balance and her ability to stand so fast she almost knocked Duo to the floor.

"YOU! How the hell could you NOT tell me!?" But she didn't let the Commander reply.

"You know what, NO! I don't want to hear it! I cannot hear it! Not now! But you can be damn sure we are not done with this conversation." She shook her head vehemently. She was utterly bewildered.

She now addressed Duo.

"Where is he?! Where is my husband?! Where is Heero!?" She knew she was screeching, but she didn't give a damn. Her heart was crying out for the love of her life! She had to see him!

The normally humorous man didn't crack a joke or waste time.

"Come with me," he said in such a serious voice that it would have been startling had she been in her usual frame of mind.

Une still sat in her chair. She hadn't moved, she was truly starting to feel the weight of her actions. She only watched as the braided pilot and Vice Foreign Minister rushed out of her office.

She knew this wasn't over, it had only just begun. The storm clouds had gathered, the winds were picking up and the rain had just started to fall.

* * *

 

**All the players are in place, what do you suppose will happen now? ;-)**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you to my AMAZING betas Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and Wings Landing…y’all are my besties and betas and sanity in the rough seas of FF.**

**Thank you to all of the lovely readers and reviewers and favorites and follows! I hope you enjoy this wild ride! Thank you again for the support!**


	7. Chapter 7

**I own nothing but my original characters.**

* * *

Chapter 7

They walked briskly through the underground tunnel towards the medical wing. The very fact that she managed to remain upright, let alone walk at all, was a miracle. A miracle, yes…today was certainly a day for miracles. The last few minutes had completely upended her world. She still couldn't believe it. Then again…her heart already knew…it had always known.

Had she possessed the ability, she would have laughed. However, at the moment, her mind was a whirlwind of chaos. She followed the braid, swinging from side to side, belonging to the former Gundam Pilot who now led her to the other half of her soul. Her only thought was to see him, her husband…Heero.

In what seemed like a year, they had finally arrived at a plain white door.

"This is it," Duo spoke softly, caution and concern lacing his tone and evident in his gaze.

She couldn't seem to find her voice. All she could manage was a slight nod as her heart pounded fiercely in her ears.

"Princess, just take a deep breath," Duo said with all the seriousness and care that she had never witnessed from the normally jovial man. "Are you ready?"

She was caught between the urge to run through the door or just stay frozen outside of it. Yet, she managed to nod her head. Once again, it was all she could do, her voice completely lost to her emotions.

Upon the opening of that inconsequential looking door, she became hyperaware. The air felt as if it were cloaking her body like a shroud. The white sterile room was blinding. She stood petrified, just a few steps into the room. The whirring and buzzing from the machines momentarily freezing her heart.

Her breath hitched in her throat as her vision zeroed in on the figure laying so deathly still on that little antiseptic bed. The very man who had haunted her dreams, shattered her heart and was currently reconstructing it with just his mere presence.

She couldn't wrap her brain around the fact that he was here, that this was actually real and not one of her hellish nightmares. Her husband, the father of her child, the holder of her heart, the boy who had fallen from the stars. The man who had so completely and irrevocably made her his, while bringing color and passion to her otherwise drab world.

"Princess…breathe." Duo viewed her with caution.

She willed the air to move through her body.

"D…Duo…is he asleep or in a…coma?" Her voice sounded so small, even to herself.

Duo let out a breath that sounded extremely loud in that moment.

"When I found him…he was awake, but only for a moment. Enough to tell me to shut up." Duo chuckled lightly at the memory. "But ya know what? That tells me he's still himself; he is still Heero." Duo seemed positive as if he were attempting to infuse that sentiment into her by merely speaking.

She was glad to hear that Heero still sounded like himself. However, the thought brought another question to the forefront of her mind, a question she wasn't entirely certain she wanted the answer to.

"H…how long has he been unconscious?"

That question made Duo's features drop, and her stomach right along with it.

"Duo…please tell me what you know?" Her voice was the tiniest bit louder and stronger this time. She knew he was worried about the level of shock she might currently be experiencing. She also knew that he hadn't told her much, but she needed to know what the hell was happening with her husband.

Her heart was throbbing, being so close to him, yet still so far. It took her mind back to that ill-fated Christmas when he had rescued her from Mariemaia. Seeing him now, passed out in a hospital bed, was so similar…only this time, she had no idea what horrors had transpired to put him into such a state.

"Princess, I honestly don't know much. I just know that I found him floating, in a locked room. I didn't recognize him…"

"What?! Why?!" She cut him off abruptly, a parade of horrors playing in her mind.

Duo just stepped aside, lightly tossing his head in the direction of the bed that held the man in question. She had been so lost in her own thoughts, she hadn't made it too close to the bed yet. His presence alone had stopped her in her tracks. Now, although she moved quickly, it still somehow felt like slow motion.

As he came completely into view, she now understood what Duo meant. His chocolate locks were still wild and free, but now they were longer, and he had facial hair as well. If she didn't know any better, she wouldn't have recognized him either. But she did know better. Her recognition wasn't just skin deep. They knew each other's energy, spirit and soul. She knew it was him from the minute she entered that cold and impersonal room.

"Heero..." She breathed more than spoke.

Her hand reached out to his face, now obstructed with the overgrowth of hair. She had never seen him with facial hair. Under different circumstances, she might have liked it. However, right now it felt like just one more thing keeping him from her. She wanted, no needed, to see him. Dear God and how she yearned to see his eyes again. She was torn between relief and heartache. She grabbed his hand bringing it to her lips.

The clearing of Duo's throat brought her back to the reality that she was not alone.

"Is there anything else you can tell me?" Her voice was shaky at the request.

"Unfortunately, Princess, I am afraid not. Right after he told me to shut up, he passed out." Duo paused suddenly, as if there were more to say and he just didn't want to tell her.

Even in her current emotional state, she didn't miss it.

"What is it Duo? Just say it…please." She implored.

"Well, the thing is, he's been passed out ever since. He didn't budge the entire way back or even when he was admitted here." She held up her free hand to silence him.

Relena aimed a probing look at the self-proclaimed Shinigami as one inquiry came screaming to the forefront of her mind.

"How? How did you actually know he was alive?"

The fact that fear seemed to race through his amethyst eyes in a split second did not escape her attention. "Duo? Please? I have a right to know?" Her words were halfway between demanding and pleading.

Duo visibly gulped before he began to speak.

"Now, keep in mind, I don't know everything, I just know...Une ordered a chip...a tracker to be implanted...after his second mission. And Heero wasn't aware." He spoke cautiously and with anger lacing his words.

Her eyes grew wide in a mixture of horror and fury. If she had been angry with the Commander before, she was livid now. She felt faint, she had overestimated her ability to handle this, she couldn't hear anymore. In a attempt to stay lucid, she made the decision that she and Heero would deal with the Commander later, as she pushed the infuriating thought to the back of her mind.

All she wanted to focus on, all she could focus on was him, and the fact that he was back with her now. He was breathing and she could feel his warmth. Granted, it was slightly stolen by the frigid temperature in that awful room, but his warmth was unmistakable. Just feeling his pulse and knowing that his blood still coursed through his veins was enough. It allowed her to hold onto her hope. Honestly, Duo needn't say anymore. She understood that for the perfect soldier, being passed out this long was unusual. It caused her heart to ache at the possible implications.

Lowering her hand, she now clasped both of her hands around one of Heero's hands and looked at Duo.

"Thank you...so...very…much Duo." The emotions were too great, too overwhelming. The tears fell before she could even think to stop them. Part of her didn't want to stop them. It was the only way she could accurately convey her undying gratitude to the braided man. He had brought her husband back to her, had brought her life back to her. Even if he wasn't awake…he was still alive.

"I know…this…wasn't easy for you Duo. I will never…be able to repay you for bringing him back to me. I am in your…eternal debt," She was sobbing now, half in heartache and half in joy.

Despite her touching words, Duo was not a stupid man. In fact, he was quite the opposite. He didn't need to be told when it was time to leave. Nor did he require praise or accolades. Seeing the Princess cry and thank him was conflicting. While he was happy that she was appreciative, at the same time, it made him slightly uncomfortable. He had spent a lifetime fighting behind the scenes and never getting credit. So, to suddenly be told she was in his debt...it was not an experience he was all-together familiar with. Besides, bringing his best buddy back to the land of the living was its own reward. He would have done it with or without her gratitude, or anyone else's, for that matter. It was his job to look out for the guy, whether Heero wanted it or not. Regardless of the fallout surrounding the situation, he was just glad to help piece back together his favorite couple. Walking up to her, he wrapped his arm around her shoulders in a half hug.

"Don't mention it, Princess. It's what I do." He managed his usual wink, just like always, his cheery disposition shining through his somber mask.

"Now, if you or Heero need anything, anything at all, don't hesitate to call me, I mean it?"

She nodded. Even with the humorous edge of his voice, she knew he was completely serious.

As she watched him leave, she realized that this was a turning point for all of them. She also knew that she had never felt closer to the former God of death.

0101010101

With the closing of the door, Duo let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. The atmosphere in the hall was a complete contrast compared to the heavy environment inside the room. He had been so relieved that he had accomplished his mission. He'd honestly worried that it wasn't real, that the signal was a fluke or a trap. The longer he went through that burnt out colony, it had been as creepy as it was discouraging, he truly started to believe that he wasn't going to find him. Hearing Heero speak, even for a moment, felt like one of his greatest victories. Duo was just grateful that he managed to find him before the signal was lost.

At that thought, he now remembered he had a meeting.

0101010101

Une sat at her desk, blankly staring at her computer screen. She had remained there ever since Relena and Duo had stormed out of her office. She futilely kept attempting to type a report, but her mind was far too preoccupied with what was happening in the medical wing.

The pain she had caused by the information she had to deliver was immense. Yet, that wasn't actually where the pain originally derived…that came on the day she had declared him gone. It had been two years, after-all. What the hell was she supposed to do? She was like a doctor who had been trying too long to revive a dead patient. Only instead of minutes, it had been years. The blasted chip she had implanted, to prevent this very situation, had stopped transmitting. He wasn't back and hadn't checked in. So, she made a tough call. That was part of her job, to make the tough decisions.

She recalled that hellish day all too vividly; the day she had to inform Relena they were officially declaring Heero deceased. She had never witnessed such a broken look on the Vice Foreign Minister's face, and she had hoped to never see it again. The mere thought of such a look sent a chill through her soul. It irrevocably haunted her. However, today, she felt as if that look had revisited her once more. True, it wasn't the same decimated appearance as before, but it certainly possessed the same qualities. Only this time…the unadulterated hatred seeping from the queen of pacifism was sobering.

Once upon a time, Une never could have fathomed caring this much about those she worked with…outside of Treize, of course. However, since adopting Mariemaia, her heart had opened up in ways she had no prior understanding. It had been a learning lesson on all fronts, and probably one of the greatest challenges of her life. It was both wonderful and frustrating. She could have laughed at the sheer ironies of life. The unfeeling Commander, taking in an orphan, giving her human side a try. That's what some around the office had been gossiping and whispering about around the watercooler. It's not as if she wasn't aware of what they said about her...she just didn't care.

Her job was something she had always excelled at, it was her solace and stability in a chaotic world. Working with the Preventers provided an atonement of sorts, penance for the atrocities that she either committed or played a part in during the war. She enjoyed utilizing her skills to help maintain peace and order. It was what she was good at; it's what she knew. Only when she started letting people in and allowing emotions to play a part in her day to day life did things become complicated. A double edged sword…her life seemed to be reflecting that more and more these days.

Her thoughts were interrupted by the sound of her door opening. She didn't even need to look up to know who stood in her doorway. As he said previously, their conversation wasn't over.

"Duo," She spoke with a reserved coolness.

He seemed unaffected by her obvious attempt to dispel the tension now flooding her office. He was here to continue their discussion from earlier, just as he had promised. She knew it was coming, and while she dreaded it, a part of her was actually relieved to finally be able to divulge this secret.

He didn't say a word as he crossed her office and plopped into the chair in front of her desk. "Well, I'm beat. Bringing a man back from the dead is hard work." He spoke with a seriousness she wasn't accustomed to. It was unnerving. "I figured I'd give you the opportunity to try your explanation out on me. Ya know, get your story straight before you have to tell the best killer in the universe of your fucked up decision."

She breathed out a weary sigh.

"Duo, you have no idea the decisions I have to make here…"

"Oh, don't give me that shit! Don't blame it on your job! You made that decision because you didn't want to lose track of your best asset! You said it yourself!"

She was frustrated, exhausted, and quite frankly, she was unnerved by his severe demeanor at the moment.

"YES! OKAY?! YES! I couldn't afford to lose him! And look what happened! We lost him anyway! Does it please you to hear me say the words?"

He ignored the question, although he did feel almost special that he was one of the rare few to witness such an admission from the great Commander. But this wasn't the time to gloat.

"So, how? When did you do it? How the hell could he not know?" It seemed as if Duo spoke the last question more to himself, but she knew he still wanted the answer.

"It was after his second mission with the Preventers. He was unconscious, and admitted here for observation. I authorized the implantation of a chip that would allow me to keep track of our most valued asset. As you well know, he was very skilled at disappearing and honestly, with his list of enemies, it seemed opportune…"

"Don't you mean opportunistic!?" Duo's biting tone cut her off, and even though she chose not to acknowledge it, it still stung. "Soooo, you just chose NOT to inform him of the new addition to his person?"

Now she was starting to get pissed.

"Would YOU have told him?!" She yelled the question, but then just as quickly, she reigned in her emotions. "I apologize. I am just attempting to excuse my behavior, which is unbecoming to myself as well as my rank. Listen, Duo. The truth is, I don't have an excuse. I am the Commander. I made a decision and I will stand by it. The past is in the past, nothing can change it and honestly…I am not sure that I would change it…"

"WHAT?!" Duo screamed.

"Duo, allow me to finish. The reason I say this is solely due to the fact that if it weren't for my actions…we never would have discovered that he was still alive."

Duo's mouth formed around silent words. As much as he hated to admit it, she was absolutely correct. He had realized that himself. But, just because that was true, it still didn't make what she did right.

As if reading his mind, she answered his unspoken thought.

"It does not make what I did right. I should have told him. But as I stated, I stand by my decision."

0101010101

The room was silent except for the machines aiding in stabilizing the unconscious man. The blond woman had been so emotionally overwhelmed that she had cried herself into slumber, her hands were still firmly grasping one of his. Even in sleep, she didn't dare let go.

Rousing from her fitful nap, she bolted upright, terrified that it was all just another cruel machination of her mind. Then she felt her hands still wrapped around his. She looked at him in awe, again absorbing the reality that he was still alive. Still unconscious, so very still, his breathing faint, but she was just grateful that he was still in-fact breathing. She now realized, this was the very same feeling she experienced when looking at their son. Thinking of their son, her heart was absorbed in both joy and lament.

Now, her memories whisked her away to that chaotic Christmas. Kidnapped, Heero arrived and blew up the bunker with the intent to rescue her or kill her, if the situation called for it, they were both prepared to pay the ultimate price. She nearly chuckled at the insanity of such a thought. An outsider could consider their relationship unhealthy. Many had, in fact. But they knew, as did their inner circle, they were completely right for each other. Their relationship was unique but extraordinary. There was only one other time she had witnessed him unconscious, but he didn't stay that way for long. This time, he had already been unconscious far longer than anyone would have expected. The mere thought had her suppressing a shiver.

His long hair and beard angered her now, as if it were taunting her. She felt as if the overgrown facial hair and lengthy locks were mocking her. She could no longer stand it. She couldn't leave him like this. Grabbing her phone, she quickly made a call.

Less than an hour later, her hairstylist was meeting her at the door of the private room. Since her hairstylist was bound by a considerable confidentiality contract, she would not be allowed to speak of this or anything she learned here. Regardless, Relena knew she could be trusted. Karen was 15 years Relena's senior and not easily surprised or star struck, which was ideal for Relena's line of work. Karen had been working with Relena for a little over a year, and while Karen knew that she had lost her husband, she thankfully did not know what he looked like. Right now, that was a heaven sent relief. It was an odd request, but Karen showed no signs of judgement.

Relena was fortunate that Karen was skilled in male grooming techniques. She had completely forgotten that had actually been a requirement added to her contract when she had married Heero. She had never changed the stipulations and her assistant had followed those original guidelines when hiring Karen. She could have laughed. Perhaps it was a small way, the universe had prepared for his return.

As the hair fell away and the beard slowly disappeared, it was as if she were seeing his face for the first time. In many ways, that was true. Her heart fluttered, relieved that the same beautiful features remained.

Had Relena possessed the ability, she would have groomed him herself. In fact, part of her wanted to do that for him. She longed to do anything for him, as his wife. Yet, even if she had possessed the knowledge, her emotions wouldn't allow for a steady hand.

Karen finished quickly, a credit to her trade, and left without questions or even so much as a probing look. She was a true professional, one of the reasons Relena valued her.

Relena sat back down, bringing her chair as close to the bed as possible. Once again, she pulled his hand into hers and looked at his now cleanly shaven face. Now, she just yearned to see him open those stunning Prussian orbs that always claimed her heart so completely. He was still so handsome and she found herself, once again, being unable to relinquish his hand.

She was just so relieved to have him back with her. Their son would finally be able to meet his father. Heero would finally be able to meet his son. The thought piecing together her broken heart, her tears of sorrow mixing with her tears of joy.

She didn't know how she would tell him about Jonah, or all that had transpired in the time of his absence. Then she recalled one of the more alarming points in her recent history. How would she tell him about Trowa? The question had terror blooming within her soul.

"R…Re…lena."

"Heero!?"

* * *

**How will Relena handle this? How will Heero handle everything? Stay Tuned! :-)**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you to my AMAZING betas Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and Wings Landing…y'all are my besties and betas and sanity in the rough seas of FF.**

**Thank you to all of the lovely readers and reviewers and favorites and follows! I hope you enjoy this wild ride! Thank you again for the support!**


	8. Chapter 8

**I own nothing except for my original characters.**

* * *

Chapter 8

"R…Re…lena."

"Heero!?"

Hearing his voice again had her heart rejoicing in elation.

"Heero! You're awake! Oh, Heero!" She cried through her words, tears of joy streaming down her face.

His eyes, those beautiful Prussian blues, so intense, so uniquely him, never failed to capture her attention, as well as her heart. She had sprung to her feet at the sound of his voice, yet didn't dare release his hand. She stood, unable to tear her eyes away, not that she wanted to. She basked in this reunion of husband and wife, two hearts and two souls.

"Re…lena."

"Yes, Heero, I am here, I'm right here. You're home. You're safe." Her voice was trembling with emotion, her heart exalting in the revelation that he was awake and that he had truly come back to her.

Even in his disoriented state, his strength had not diminished; proven by his closing the distance between them as he pulled her to him and claimed her lips.

When their lips met, her heart stopped and, yet, just as quickly began to race. It was like coming home, her home, the only home she had ever wanted or needed. It had been so very long, and yet it was as if no time had passed at all. The fire in his kiss still remained, her mind somehow staying coherent long enough to realize that his kiss was yearning and hungry. From the pure need emitting from him, her whole body felt as if it were engulfed in flames. Her desire was reignited, desire specific only to him. No one else could make her feel this way. No one could kiss her like this. Not even Trowa.

The realization was like plunging into an icy lake. She froze, halting her movements and pulling away from his warmth.

"Relena?" Heero questioned, worry evident in his eyes.

"I...I...I just remembered..." She choked out..."Sally needs to know you are awake. She has strict orders to make sure you are okay. I also need to know you're okay, as do you." She was rambling. She knew it. The look on Heero's face told her he knew it as well.

She was walking backwards toward the door with every word. It was an unusual feeling, voluntarily distancing herself from the man who held her heart. While her logical side was relieved, her heart was crying out for him.

"I'll alert a nurse and I'll be right back." The nervousness in her voice was clear and her wish that he didn't pick up on it was futile.

His eyes held hers captive, the look, a mixture of hurt and confusion. The look caused her emotions to take a further dive, and send her guilt rising. She shouldn't be adding to his confusion; he had just awoken from a coma. Her troubled thoughts carried her all the way to the door; her hand couldn't seem to twist the knob fast enough. She had to get out of the room. She had to think.

The hallway provided her with a momentary reprieve, her breath returning to normal along with her heart rate, the wall doing a marvelous job at holding her upright. Finding her balance, she walked to the nurse's station and asked them to contact Sally. Being the Vice Foreign Minister did have its perks. They didn't play twenty questions with her, thankfully. They just complied.

Upon the nurses informing her that Sally was on her way, Relena found her way back to the wall that had aided her so well a few minutes ago. Once more she used it's smooth and strong surface to assist her in remaining vertical.

Since finding out that Heero was alive, all thoughts not pertaining to Heero or their son had effectively been purged from her mind. It was extremely telling. The feelings that only Heero could conjure within her had lay dormant. The memories of the intensity of their love had dimmed, buried with time and the pain born of his absence. Heero being back and awake brought it all rushing forward again with vivid clarity, bursting through her like the beautiful violence of a volcanic eruption.

The facts were indisputable. He held her heart irrevocably, his mere look making her heart pound like a hummingbird, and his kiss making her forget about the world. No, she had never truly buried any of it. But it had been over two years. She had given birth to their child and she had certainly changed through that experience. She'd been so lost, between her pain and learning to be a mother, and continuing to be the symbol of peace to the world…she had attempted to push it all away. She had to cope somehow and dimming their love had been the only way to lessen the pain; a trick of the mind to make life slightly more tolerable. Now, she realized it had never really been successful. That explained her intense and lifelike dreams reinforced by the feeling that he was never really gone. Her heart had known all along and she ignored it. How in the world would she even begin to explain this to him? Would he even forgive her? What would she do about Trowa? Dear God! Would Heero  _kill_  him? The terrifying thought swallowed her in panic.

"Relena?"

She found herself looking up into the concerned eyes of Sally.

"Oh, Sally! I am sorry."

"No need to apologize. But are you alright? I wouldn't have expected you to be out here? Or did I misunderstand the message that Heero's awake?"

"Oh, no! He is! Awake, that is...yes, he is awake!" Relena spoke in a louder voice than normal and a tone halfway between terror and joy.

The look on Sally's face did not escape Relena's attention and it only managed to make her feel even worse.

Sally smiled sympathetically towards Relena as she stepped past her, placed with her hand on the doorknob and turned back to Relena.

"Shall we?"

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In the harsh light of day, his confidence in last night's decision was waning. He fully realized he'd allowed his pride to eclipse his logic. But even more alarming was the fear that he'd betrayed the precious gift of Relena's trust. Sitting at his desk, just staring at his computer screen was primarily how his day was comprised. Every time he attempted to work, the nagging feeling in his soul would flare up yet again. It was late in the day, the blanket of nightfall had settled over the earth. He had no messages from Relena and he had no desire to find out why…or more specifically…have his hunch confirmed. This constant distraction had prevented him from being anything that resembled productive, so he had given up.

Now, he just stared at the wall…the wall was indifferent. It was just blank…just how he wished his mind could be right now.

The sound of his door opening would have probably gone unnoticed by anyone else, but he was far too aware of his surroundings. It was both a gift and a curse. Regardless of his superior skills, he had honestly been expecting this visit. Perhaps not so soon, but nonetheless expecting it.

He slowly turned his chair, silently addressing the former God of Death. The name struck Trowa as perfectly ironic in this instance. Standing in his doorway, the fluorescent lighting from the hallway outlining the Deathscythe pilot, giving his form a blackened appearance, it was as if the braided man was Trowa's own personal Shinigami…and in many ways, that is exactly what he was right now.

Duo didn't say a word as he took the chair in front of Trowa's desk.

The severe look and demeanor emitting from Duo would have made a lesser man shiver. It was truly unnerving. Trowa had only seen a serious Duo a handful of times, and every time, it never failed to reinforce why he was called the God of Death. The supposed idiot pilot was anything but idiotic. That was his cover to hide his true identity, or more accurately...his abilities.

They just sat there, regarding each other in intense silence. An outsider would have thought they were just staring at each other, but the tension in the air told a different story.

"What can I do for you, Duo?" Trowa spoke with a cool and controlled air.

Duo let out a laugh wrapped in a scoff.

"Oh, please, just stop! You know damn well! You can play dumb with everyone else, but not me, man. So, while we all know you are the King of the poker face, regardless, it's not what you can do for me, but what you can do for my best friend and his family."

Hearing Duo's speech was uncomfortable to say the least, mainly due to the fact that it caused that fucking feeling to rear its ugly head again. Yet, despite it all, his training took over and he remained stone-faced and silent.

"Is there anything you would like to get off your chest, Trowa?" Duo spoke in a steady and almost venomous tone that was dripping with implication.

Once more, Trowa did not flinch.

Duo let out a weary sigh. He had hoped Trowa might be honest, but he supposed he knew it wouldn't be that simple.

"Okay, man. I tried to give you a chance to come clean, but alright, have it your way." Duo swore he could see the slightest hint of movement on the normally unfazed features of the former Heavyarms pilot.

Duo sighed.

"Trowa, remember our little non-existent rendezvous on the roof? Yeah, well, I had an inkling, and I did some digging." That time Duo knew he saw Trowa flinch. "I did some snooping on the back channels, ya know…doing what I do…tracking digital footprints." Yep, now Duo definitely saw a visible flinch. "Honestly Trowa, I would have expected you to you hide your tracks better. But then again, maybe you were hoping to get caught? Perhaps you needed some way to cleanse your guilty conscience?"

Duo had barely finished speaking before Trowa had bolted from his chair.

"Duo, you don't have the slightest idea what I've been going through!"

Now Duo was on his feet mirroring Trowa's menacing stance.

"Oh, excuse me! I forgot you were the only one having a tough time!? Oh, wait! No, no you aren't! Ya know what? I've got a little newsflash for ya! YOU don't have the market cornered on bad times! We've all been going through it, man! Although, I guess it's been slightly easier for you, having your friend's wife to comfort you at night!"

He didn't even see it coming, but he sure as hell felt it. Trowa's fist connected with his jaw as white hot searing pain consumed him.

Trowa had jumped his desk, lunging forward, punching the braided man and using him as a cushion for their inevitable fall to the ground.

It only took a couple seconds, but Duo quickly regained his senses. He flipped them, putting Trowa in a headlock. Normally, Duo knew this wouldn't be so easy, but Trowa was definitely off his game today. This only confirmed Duo's suspicions.

"Tro…wa! St…op!" Duo hollered in exasperation as he struggled to keep Trowa in the headlock. "Man! I know, okay?! I know you knew!" Duo practically screamed now.

That was enough to drain all of the fight out of Trowa. Duo released him and stood up, but Trowa didn't move from the floor.

The fears that had been occupying his thoughts had come to light. Just hearing Duo say those words was enough to make his blood run cold.

"I know you knew there was a possibility Heero was alive, Trowa. But you still went to Relena's that night anyway. You are aware her estate's security cameras are linked to the mainframe here, right? It's not hard, well for me anyway, to hack that system. Come on, man!? It was bad enough that you were with her at all, but this? Really? What the hell is wrong with you?! I'm tempted to tell her myself of your betrayal, but I won't because it would only cause her further pain. Tell me though, Trowa, did you take one last shot at her AFTER you knew there was a chance he was still alive?"

The words angered Trowa, if for no other reason but for their accuracy. His anger and guilt now urging him to finally move from the floor.

For the first time in his career, that seemingly impenetrable mask cracked. The normally unemotional man's eyes showed Duo everything he needed to know. This time, Trowa couldn't hide.

Duo had his arms crossed over his chest, his braid slightly swinging from the back and forth motion of his head shaking in disappointment.

"Holy shit, man! Well, if you weren't in deep shit before, you sure as hell are now."

"You think I don't know that?!" Trowa yelled.

Normally, Trowa yelling would have unnerved Duo. But today, he didn't give a rat's ass.

"If I were you, I would get the hell out of dodge, man, like yesterday. When he wakes up, you should be gone!"

"I am not going to abandon Relena like that!" Trowa angrily voiced.

"Abandon her?! Are you kidding me?! Man, Heero is back! Ya know, her HUSBAND! He never died. Therefore, they are still married AND they have a kid! I know you were digging playing house and all, but playtime is over, bro! I told you before and I'll say it again, since clearly your bangs obscure more than just one eye; she has, does and ALWAYS WILL PICK HEERO!"

"So, it is true? You found him? He's alive? He's back?"

"Uh, YEEEEAH! Damn, man! What the hell have I been saying here?!

The anger rolling off Trowa was undeniable as he walked to the door.

"Duo, leave."

Duo scoffed at Trowa's words. "Sure thing, pal." Duo walked to the door, but stopped right in front of Trowa.

"Oh, and you might be wondering why I didn't hit you back? I am going to leave all the punches to Heero. God knows he deserves them. Hope your insurance is paid up and your affairs are in order buddy, because if he doesn't kill you, you'll be getting off light."

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"I don't know why I'm surprised?" Sally seemed to mumble, mostly to herself. "Heero, you don't appear as if anything is physically wrong with you, outside of exhaustion and some slight dehydration and some nutrition deficiency. But those are things that can easily be rectified. Besides, knowing you, it won't phase you and you'll bounce back faster than any regular case. Other than that, you are surprisingly okay. Although, you will need to be evaluated by psych."

Heero gave her a look that made her flinch, but only inwardly. There was a part of her that had missed that look. She was just glad to have him back. Although, she wasn't excited about having to explain her part in the chip implantation. She brushed the thought aside. She didn't want to think about that until she had to. Regardless, she was bound by orders, she couldn't break protocol until Une gave clearance.

"Now, Heero, it is standard procedure. It's unavoidable." His look didn't change at her explanation.

"When can I go home?" He asked in his usual stoic tone.

"Once psyche evaluates you, I can discharge you. So, more than likely tomorrow."

Heero just nodded his head. His eyes once more found his wife, who seemed to be trying to disappear into the wall.

Sally had noticed the tension between the two. Mostly the tension was coming from Relena since they entered the room. She wasn't accustomed to seeing the love birds in such a state. But then again, she knew that Heero was completely unaware of the goings on of his wife while he had been MIA. Her heart went out to Relena. She did  _not_ envy her position. At that thought, she realized her job was complete. There was nothing more she could do here.

"Okay, you two, I am going to head out and finish up my rounds. If you need me, just call." With that, she made her way to the door and exited the tense atmosphere.

Relena had watched the entire scene between Sally and Heero, as if she weren't really there, like she was watching a TV show or a movie. She felt as if she were having an out of body experience at one point. Her mind was a cage and she was currently trapped. She didn't know how to tell him? She hated this feeling. She had always been able to talk to him. Now, she was wholly tongue-tied. It was an odd sensation, considering talking made up a good portion of her profession.

Now he just stared at her with those gorgeous Prussian eyes, eyes that she had longed to see. Eyes that now terrified her as they probed her soul.

He was going to be discharged soon and he would be expecting to come home. That thought was as wonderful as it was grim. What if he didn't want to come home after she told him? No, she couldn't think that way. Of course he would come home. But Trowa, he absolutely could not be there. All traces of him would need to be gone as well. She currently had the overwhelming urge to brick up the room they had shared. What about Jonah? Oh God!? How was she supposed to do this?

His voice brought her out of her distressing inner monologue.

"Relena, what's wrong?" His usual non-emotional tone normally wouldn't have affected her, but today, it was chilling. So much,  _so fucking much,_ was wrong at the moment.

Somehow, she managed to find the strength to move her feet towards the bed. His hand had shot out towards her as she found the ability to grasp it. He looked at her with concern swimming in the depths of his mesmerizing orbs. The hormones, that only he could evoke nearly took her over, threatening to enslave her as she fought the urge to seize his lips.

She let out an unsteady breath. Her tears were brimming at the edges of her eyes and she knew there would be no stopping them.

"Heero…we need to talk."

* * *

**I LOVE serious Duo!**

**So, next up, Heero finds out! Things go sideways and get INSANE! Haha!**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you to my AMAZING betas Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and Wings Landing…y'all are my besties and betas and sanity in the rough seas of FF.**

**Thank you to all of the lovely readers and reviewers and favorites and follows! I hope you enjoy this wild ride! Thank you again for the support!**


	9. Chapter 9

**I own nothing except for my original characters.**

**LET THE EXCREMENT FLY! IT'S ABOUT TO GET CRAZY! HERE WE GO!**

* * *

Chapter 9

Duo walked briskly down the hall and away from Trowa's office. Quite frankly, he was relieved to get the hell out of there. It really took a considerable amount of effort not to knock Trowa the fuck out. The discomfort in his jaw was a souvenir he could've done without. However, his physical discomfort was nothing compared to his emotional turmoil. He honestly didn't know how to feel right now.

Confliction was the order of the day. He was thrilled that his best friend was alive and he was glad to be the one to bring him back to Relena and their son. But, knowing what his buddy was soon to find out, he just had to wonder if the perfect soldier was going to unleash a perfect killing spree that started with Trowa.

He pondered being in Heero's shoes. Would he understand why Relena did it? However, the most terrifying thought...what if Heero couldn't be with Relena anymore because of her and Trowa shacking up together? He found himself suppressing a shiver, he couldn't even think of such a possibility. He just couldn't imagine the two of them not being together. Even when Heero was declared deceased, it never felt right. Of course, he knew why, now. But, still…those two were just…made for each other.

Duo honestly didn't know how he would take it if he were in the same situation. Would he understand? Would he be able to forgive? Would he be able to NOT kill the man who had tried to take his place? All of these questions were enshrouding his mind as he made his way to the medical offices.

"Duo, are you alright? You look as if you're in a trance?"

"Ah, Sally, just the woman I was looking for."

"Uh, I see a bruise forming on your face, what happened?"

"Not here. Can we go to your office?"

The serious tone Duo used alarmed her.

"Of course." She whispered.

They walked in silence, Duo's thoughts keeping his brain busy, while Sally just wondered what the hell had just happened to the braided man. As soon as they entered her office, she was speaking upon closing the door.

"Okay, Duo what the hell happened to you?"

"Trowa."

"TROWA?!"

"Yes, Trowa," Duo said the two words very slowly with an extremely pointed look.

She was about to question his strange response, but her voice was stolen as realization dawned on her; her eyes growing as big as saucers. "Trowa knows about Heero being awake?"

"Wait, What?! NO! I didn't even know he was awake! He's awake?! Really!? Wow! Damn! Why did nobody tell me?!" The former Deathsythe pilot practically screeched.

Duo went to move towards the door, but Sally grabbed his sleeve.

"Not so fast, Duo! Now isn't a good time, he and Relena still have to talk…Heero might need you afterward."

Sally's calm words managed to slice through Duo's excited response, he knew she was right. Even if Heero didn't think he needed him, Duo would still be there for him. Hell, he left his very pregnant wife to go retrieve the man from the icy clutches of space. The least he could do now was remain on standby.

Once again Sally's voice cut into Duo's thoughts.

"Duo, you came here for a reason, so in the meantime, I suggest you allow me look at your jaw. I understand Trowa has a hell of a left hook."

"Well, I'm not exactly fragile, doc."

Sally shook her head, letting out an exasperated breath.

"Regardless, let's make sure nothing else was injured during your playdate."

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Her hand, even though being held within his firm grasp, was now shaking, along with the rest of her body.

"Relena?" Concern was now seeping into his voice and while that would normally make her heart sing, it was only making this more difficult.

She was in hell, wanting to keep her hand in his embrace, wanting to stay close to him and his warmth that she had missed on so many lonely nights. However, right now, she couldn't even look at him. Of all of the ways her heart broke over the time of his absence, now her heart was breaking for a completely different reason. In this moment, she felt like a horrible wife and just an awful person. She didn't know how to say the words, her heart throbbed at the idea of putting him in pain, but she had know other choice.

"Heero." Her eyes suddenly finding the plain white wall behind him fascinating. More accurately, it was the wall's simplicity that allowed her to calm her emotions just enough so that she could speak evenly.

"As Sally informed you, you know that you have been gone for over two years?"

He nodded his head in acknowledgement.

"Relena, you have to know I never planned to be gone that long, but…"

"Heero…please…let me get this out. I have to tell you…you need to know...all that has happened since you've been gone…and I really don't know how..."

A knock on the door stopped her words. A middle-aged looking man poked his head into the room.

"Mr. Yuy?"

Heero hadn't looked away from Relena, he just voiced his usual, "Hn."

"Oh, okay, great. I am Dr. Adam Wallace. Dr. Chang requested that we move up your psychiatric evaluation to today if possible and I happen to still be here, so you are luck." The man talked as if the other occupants were actually listening…they were not. "Oh, you must be Mrs. Yuy?"

Hearing that title again was like a rock flying into the fragile glass house that protected her sensibilities, shattering it into a million pieces. She gasped as she realized that she wasn't currently wearing her wedding ring. Like a defibrillator shocking her dormant heart and bringing it back to life in the same instance, she quickly pulled her hand back from Heero, earning a look of bewilderment from the love of her life.

Where Relena was previously frustrated with the interruption, now she was immensely grateful.

"I'll leave you to it then. Heero, I will return shortly."

She moved swiftly past the now perplexed doctor as she made a hasty exit.

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"It doesn't appear as if anything is broken, which is surprising for Trowa. He must not have been aiming to break it. You're lucky."

"Lucky?! I guess that's one way of looking at it," Duo scoffed through a bitter chuckle.

"So, how did Relena look when you left her, doc?"

Sally let out an almost sad sigh.

"Honestly, she looked terrified."

Duo's heart hurt at the mental image, but it made sense.

"I honestly hate to leave her to do it alone."

"Duo, they are grown adults. What do you honestly think is going to happen?"

The look Duo aimed at Sally spoke volumes.

"Duo, you don't honestly think Heero would hurt her!?"

"Normally, I would say no. But Sally, he is in for some pretty intense news and we don't know what the hell happened to him while he was gone. His mind could be messed up!" He yelled louder than he intended.

"Duo, I just came from talking with him, he seems fine to me. The same as always."

"Has he had his psych evaluation yet?"

The question gave her pause.

"Well, I requested that his psych be moved up to as soon as possible, so we will know soon enough."

Duo nodded in agreement.

"Doc, I need to ask you a favor."

Sally narrowed her eyes, it was rare when the braided man asked her for a favor.

"I think you should have your husband on standby, just in case…something happens."

"What exactly are you anticipating might happen?" She looked truly surprised at the mere suggestion.

"Honestly, I don't know, doc. But I've got a hunch."

"Well, I don't think Wufei is going to be willing to be on standby for one of your hunches."

"That's why it's called a favor, doc." He winked, just like the Duo she knew so well.

"Fine, I'll ask him." Sally released an exasperated breath.

"I wonder how it's going with Relena and Heero?" Duo voiced with an air of trepidation.

"Well, Heero is in his psych evaluation and I am on the verge of a nervous breakdown."

Sally and Duo were startled by the appearance of the new arrival. Relena was closing the door as she walked into the office.

"Sally, I wanted to thank you for moving up Heero's psych examination. Considering all I have to tell him, it's probably best that he be evaluated beforehand."

"Of course, Relena. I requested that it be done as soon as possible. I am glad that someone was available to see him tonight. By the way, which doctor came to the rescue?"

Relena gave pause as her mind sifted through the last few minutes of her life for the answer. "A...doctor Willis...no...WALLACE! Yes, that's it!"

"Ah yes, he's one of our best! Luckily he likes to work late." Sally lightly chuckled. "No one wants Heero being held longer than necessary."

"Don't you mean, we don't need them deciding to lock him up and throw away the key?" Duo laughed through his question.

Even though he sounded like his usual humorous self, neither woman could laugh. The idea that Heero couldn't control himself to the point that he would be locked up was an unsettling thought.

"Duo, what happened to your jaw?!" Relena asked in concern.

It didn't escape her attention that he seemed to slightly flinch at her inquiry. He looked as if he were pondering his answer when he walked up to her with a wisp of a smirk on his face.

"Oh, you know, some asshole ex-pilot socked me for calling him out on the error of his ways." The twinkle in his eye spoke of a secret lying beneath his words.

She sensed what, or more specifically who he was referring to, which immediately reminded her that she had a matter to attend.

0101010101

"Pagan?"

"Yes, Miss Relena. Mr. Maxwell called earlier to inform me that you wouldn't be home right away tonight. Bridgett is staying with Jonah for as long as you require. Is everything quite alright, Miss?"

Relena took a deep breath. Once again today, she didn't know how to communicate the words that needed to be said. Honestly, at this point there was really no good way to say it.

"Pagan, I realize what I am about to say…will sound unbelievable, but it's so wonderful. Her voice was caught between fear and elation. "He…Heero…he…is alive." Saying the words out loud solidified the reality of him finally being back. At the moment, it just filled her heart to tell someone, to actually say the words; not as a wish, not as a prayer, but as truth.

"Oh! Miss! That is truly wonderful news!"

"Pagan, I have something to ask of you and I realize it could be considering untoward or distasteful…"

"Oh, Miss, you know I am at your service. Anything I can do for you or Master Heero, all you need do is speak it."

The unwavering devotion of her dear old friend was always such a comfort to her.

Taking a shaky breath, she began her odd request.

"Pagan, I need…I need to have everything of Trowa's collected for him, so that he can pick it up." She spoke in a rush. Finding herself closing her eyes in fear of rejection or scoffing at her unusual appeal.

She knew it probably wasn't the best way to go about it, but honestly she never made any promises to him, nor he to her. Besides, this was her way of preserving the man's life. This was the best she could do to at least try and save him from Heero's wrath.

She could have swore she heard a chuckle from the normally reserved butler, but she wasn't certain.

"With absolute pleasure, Miss Relena."

Relena didn't know what she expected from her long trusted friend, but she certainly didn't expect his eager reply. It was slightly unnerving as well as a relief. She couldn't handle rejection or judgement from Pagan…not today.

"One more thing, I need you to have some clothes for Heero sent over immediately."

"Of course, right away Miss."

"Thank you, Pagan...Heero and I should be home tonight.

Those words excited her as much as they frightened her. This was actually happening; he was back, he was alive, he was awake, he was okay and...he was coming home. Provided he still wanted to come home...after she told him.

As she hung up with Pagan and slid her phone into her pocket, she remembered what she was missing.

She reached up to the chain that had been around her neck for the past several months; the chain that had held her ring close to her heart and memorialized her husband. She opened the clasp, sliding her beautiful diamond ring off the chain. As she held the symbol of Heero's love in between her thumb and index finger, it gleamed in the fluorescent lighting of the hospital. Even after the last couple of tumultuous years…the love, the pain and the heartache, her ring had never shone so bright. As she slipped the cold metal back into place on her finger, it felt as if a miniscule sliver of her heart mended. She hadn't realized how lonely her finger had felt without it…or perhaps that was just her without him. An unbreakable diamond sitting atop a circlet of Gundaniam. She had been completely shocked that he had managed to have a ring made from the precious and supposed extinct metal. There was truly no other material so worthy, appropriate or perfect to represent their love.

Having that ring back on her finger gave her a surge of confidence to do what she needed to do now. He deserved to hear the truth from her. She owed him at least that much.

0101010101

"Well Mr. Yuy, I must say, considering the ordeal you've been through, you are surprisingly sound of mind."

"I've been through worse."

The doctor paused at the stoic man's statement. He was just about to question him, when the door opened.

"Hello again, Dr. Wallace."

"Mrs. Yuy, hello again. Good timing. You will be happy to know that your husband is mentally well."

She smiled at the doctor as she shook his hand. Her original meeting with him had not been ideal.

"Dr. Wallace, I must apologize for my behav…"

"No, no, Mrs. Yuy. Absolutely no need to apologize. Believe me, I have experienced actual bad first impressions. I assure you, our initial first meeting was not bad," he laughed at some unspoken recollection.

"Well, I appreciate your graciousness, Dr. Wallace. And you are correct, I am most pleased to hear your professional decision."

"Well, I will go to the nurses station and let them know. Then they she should be able to start Mr. Yuy's discharge paperwork."

"Thank you, Dr. Wallace."

With the closing of the door, husband and wife were alone once more.

The silence stretched, filling the space between them with the building tension of her forthcoming news.

"Relena?"

Hearing her name fall from his lips would never fail to set her entire body aflame. His Prussian blue eyes practically hypnotizing her, she just wanted to bask in that look just a moment longer before...she had to verbally stab him in the heart. If she didn't have to say the words that would cause him pain, she would have been swept away by the visions she wished to act upon and truly reunite with her husband.

His hand reached for her and, despite her logic, she moved toward him like a magnet.

"You're wearing your ring again."

She froze, her heart sped up and her eyes grew wide at the realization that he had noticed the absence of her ring. Before she could speak, one of his hands had raised to her face as his thumb caressed her cheek.

"Relena, I know I have been gone for over two years. Besides, I noticed the ring on the chain around your neck." He spoke with gentleness and she wanted to bathe in his soothing voice and touch. This was lovely and awful all at the same time. She had to tell him.

"Heero, I appreciate your understanding more than you could know, but there is something I must tell you. You deserve to know…from me. Honestly, this is one of the most difficult things I have ever had to do."

He didn't speak, didn't even nod his head. He just watched her with his penetrating gaze.

She swallowed, removing herself from him. Having contact with him right now was far too distracting. She suddenly felt as if she could faint; this had been one of the longest days of her life. She didn't even get to put her little man to bed. Thinking of her son…their son, her heart found the strength to be honest with him.

"Heero, as you know it's been over two years, two very long, painful years since you left. Nearly two and half years to be precise."

He was so quiet. His stare was piercing into her as if he could see her right through her. She once again focused on the wall and continued.

"Heero…" Her voice threatened to break and it felt as if the air could choke her as her memory replayed the worst moments of his absence. "I…didn't know what to do…without you. I held out hope that you would return to me, like you always do." The tears were brimming at her eyes. "Heero, my heart broke every day that you didn't return." Her tears fell freely now as they trailed down her face. She was glad to be standing away from him; she had been worried to get too close…even though every fiber of her being longed to kiss him and give him a proper welcome home. She shook her head to clear the thought. This wasn't the time for that. The thought was replaced with the idea that he might not ever want to touch her again. It made her blood run cold, but somehow she found the strength to continue.

"Heero…as you know Trowa was my personal security detail. But, the day…" Her silent tears now turning into a loud heart wrenching sob. "The day…Une…declared you…deceased." The word barely made it past her lips…just saying the word again was like a knife to her heart. Her hand was clenched over her breast as she physically felt the pain of that day all over again. "Heero, Trowa…was mourning with me. I was in so much pain…there were times…I just didn't want to wake up. Trowa…he comforted me." The sobs racked her body now. She was amazed that she was able to still speak. "Trowa and I…I was just so tired of…the pain…and feeling alone. I felt you were still alive…but everyone told me…it was only because I had no body to bury… and I had no closure. Heero, I am so sorry, I just…"

"Trowa?"

Her eyes immediately locked onto the now cold, hard blue eyes of her husband. She didn't have to say it; she had said enough. The pure venom in his voice was enough to replace the blood in her veins with ice. She couldn't take it. She thought she might lose her mind. She couldn't take that hard glare. Never had he aimed such a menacing stare at her, as if he didn't know who she was. He might as well have shot her in the heart. Before she made the decision, her feet were already moving her towards the door and out into the hall. She figured this might be the body's automatic response to fear and the attempt to preserve one's life.

She wasn't afraid of Heero hurting her. No, she was afraid of the pain she had caused him. His face, so cold, so angry, so hurt…she couldn't take that. Facing down OZ, kidnappers and death threat after death threat was child's play compared to this hell. She was not one to run away from anything and running away now wasn't her ideal, but she had to compose herself away from his frigid stare that threatened to stop her heart and strike her down where she stood.

She found a family bathroom and quickly let herself inside. She needed the solitude. Even in the Preventeer's medical ward she had to be aware of who could possibly see her and go squealing to the press for a quick payday.

As she splashed water on her face, she caught sight of herself in the mirror. She looked horrific. Tear stained face, bloodshot, red and puffy eyes, her hair was a mess. Her appearance was far too similar to all the days and nights she had spent crying over Heero's disappearance. She had to take a minute to collect herself...and perhaps try and do something with her hair. It was a vain thought, but that's the life of a politician and public figure; appearance is important. Her training had been ingrained into her quite thoroughly and in this moment, her mind desperately needed something normal and mundane to focus on.

0101010101

He slowly walked along the hidden tunnel that connected the Preventeer's headquarters with the medical ward. He had to see Heero for himself. He took the forgotten tunnel because he didn't need to run into anyone. He was sure that Relena was with Heero; she more than likely would be with him until he woke up.

Pagan had called to inform him that he needed to retrieve his belongings. It didn't escape Trowa's attention that the elderly butler seemed far too happy about the turn of events. But he wanted to hear it from her. She owed him that much…didn't she?

He had finally emerged into the brightly lit hallway of the medical ward and now busied himself with finding Heero's room. Being at night, the staff was sparse so the halls were clear. Making his way to the empty nurse's station, he quickly checked the board of patients and easily found the room he needed. As he made his way to the room, his heart rate seemed to increase with every step. His hand found the knob and quickly let himself inside. Expecting to find an unconscious Heero, he instead found a very much awake Heero. He was not only awake, but the pure anger rolling off of him was unmistakable. Heero was livid and staring at him with all the pure malice that one human being could hold for another. For the second time today, Trowa's mask cracked; now he was terrified.

Trowa didn't get one utterance out of his mouth as the perfect soldier barreled into him like a freight train. The action caught Trowa by surprise and sent his body into the door that had just allowed him entrance into this Lion's den.

Heero laid into him as he sat on top of him, pinning him down and landing punch after punch into Trowa's face.

"Seriously!? Relena?! You son of bitch!? MY WIFE?!" He growled and yelled in all-encompassing rage.

Trowa had managed to catch one of Heero's fists before it connected with his face again. The other fist, however, completed its journey. Trowa now rolled them while still holding the one fist and then catching the other.

"Heero!? I know you're pissed! You have every right to be, but don't do this! Think of how this will hurt Relena! Think of the baby!"

At the word baby, Trowa could have sworn he noticed a flash of actual red pass through Heero's eyes.

"Baby? BABY?! YOU HAD A BABY WITH MY WIFE!?"

The fists that Trowa had been holding had now freed themselves from his grasp and were now expertly wrapped around his neck.

As the two men thrashed around the room, the commotion could plainly be heard outside in the hall. Relena had finally found the strength to face her husband again and was walking back to the room when she heard the noises coming from the previously quiet room. Her feet picked up her pace as her eyes caught sight of Duo, Sally and Wufei heading toward her on the opposite side of the hall.

Now, she started running and Duo was the first to notice and follow her example.

She made it to the door first as she burst into the chaos that had erupted in the room.

"HEERO!? TROWA?!"

She could do nothing but watch as her husband strangled a slightly blue looking Trowa. Trowa doing his best to hit, punch and kick the man trying to murder him.

In seconds she felt people rush past her and she felt as if she was having an out of body experience. She watched Sally go to the corner digging through a drawer as Duo and Wufei pulled the warring men apart, Duo and Wufei both having to restrain Heero.

"Heero, are you going to calm down and refrain from trying to make my hospital into a warzone or am I going to have to sedate you?" The pure authority in Sally's voice made her intent clear. This was not a threat…it was a promise as she held the syringe up high for everyone to see.

Relena watched as her husband instantly calmed himself. She had never witnessed anything like that from Heero. Just the mention of sedation seemed to make him lose his fight…not completely, but enough to stop fighting Duo and Wufei.

Heero now addressed her and that horrible look was once again in his eyes, only this time there was something even more painful there.

"Did...you really have a baby with...Trowa?!" His voice was as close to broken as she had ever witnessed.

The words didn't make sense to her. What the hell was he talking about?

She shook her head vigorously. "No, no, NO!" She looked at Trowa now. "How could you tell him that?! How dare you! Have you completely taken leave of your senses? What, are you crazy now?! Jonah is NOT yours! You know damn well he is Heero's son!"

"No! Relena…"

"SHUT UP!"

She screamed in rage and anguish. She screamed like she had never screamed before in her life. The very thought of Trowa claiming her and Heero's son as his, coupled with the fact that Heero learned about his son from Trowa and not her...she swore she could actually feel her blood boil. She had never had to remind herself that she was a pacifist more in her life than in this moment. The urge to cause physical harm was overwhelming.

Her feet had moved her from the doorway, every step bringing her closer to Trowa. She didn't need a mirror to know there was murder in her eyes. The mama bear in her had reared its' head and she was ready to do battle. But then she felt a familiar touch, his touch, her husband's touch and it didn't feel menacing or threatening. That touch felt just like...him. That one touch seemed to drain away her anger in an instant.

They locked eyes. His were still hard and angry, but they had a hint of shock, softness and exhaustion mixed in the depths of his Prussian orbs.

She didn't know what to say. A sob broke free from her lips as her tears poured silently from her eyes. It was all she could do to stay upright. Her body was spent, she had nothing left.

He drew her into his embrace as her tears flowed and her body shook with her sobs.

"Relena, let's go home."

* * *

**Whew! The shit hit the fan!**

**It's about to get emotional folks! Stay Tuned!**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you to my AMAZING betas Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and Wings Landing…y'all are my besties and betas and sanity in the rough seas of FF.**

**Thank you to all of the lovely readers and reviewers and favorites and follows! I hope you enjoy this wild ride! Thank you again for the support!**


	10. Chapter 10

**I own nothing except for my original characters.**

**A/N So, just to clarify, Heero is super human, therefore he would heal super fast. Honestly, it's Heero...he has always carried on as if nothing happened even when injured. #ThatsOurHeero Haha! Also, keep in mind that Relena is a pacifist at heart, she is always feeling sensitive to others feelings. Even during Heero's absence her heart was always crying out to him, so knowing that he is alive is bringing up a lot of guilt. Yes, it was over two years, but this is 1xR, their love is extraordinary and she slept with his friend...so there's a lot of guilt happening here. They have some things to work through. #FEELS**

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Chapter 10

For the second time today, Trowa found himself on the floor unwillingly admiring the ceiling. Heero and Relena had already left. There had been a small part of him that had found himself thinking Relena might send a parting glance his way. The fact that she didn't, if he were being honest with himself...it didn't completely surprise him. His emotions were raging, but pulsing within the maelstrom of his mind, he couldn't stop the resounding realization that what they had wasn't real.

Regardless, if he had been looking for a clear answer directly from Relena…message received.

"Get up." The gruff voice of Wufei echoed throughout the room, ricocheting back at him like a direct hit to his throbbing head.

"Wufei, stop! I need to check his eye; it's swelling. Oh, and it looks like he's going to need a few stitches," Sally said with all the authority her degree and medical acumen afforded her.

"He's had worse. Honestly, he deserved much more." Wufei voiced with clear disapproval as he walked to where Sally had ordered Trowa to sit on the edge of the bed.

"Another man's wife. Disgraceful." Wufei always had a way of saying even derogatory comments with an air of further judgement. He was a man of rigid discipline and unwavering principle. In his mind, there was no other way to live and he held that same standard to everyone...whether they could live up to it or not.

Trowa didn't say a word, he just glared back at the black haired pilot. Plenty of comebacks swimming through his mind, but honestly, he didn't have the energy to fight with Wufei. Although, when it came to Wufei, he really didn't verbally fight as much as he preached. The last thing he wanted or needed right now was a lecture. So, this time, he just refrained and let him say his peace.

All of a sudden, a flash blinded his field of vision as he heard Duo laughing.

"What the hell, Duo?!" Trowa nearly snarled.

"Hey, I'm just taking photographic evidence. Ya know, so when I tell Hildi that you punched me, and I tell her she should see the other guy, she can see for herself the ass whooping you got. She always likes to see Heero's handiwork," Duo practically cackled. "Man, I swear if we hadn't come in when we did, Heero would have killed you!" Duo snapped another picture as he laughed like a kid.

Trowa's urge to punch the braided man was resurfacing yet again.

0101010101

The walk to the car was as silent as it was distant. With every step they took, the space between them seemed to fill with all of the things they weren't saying to one another. As they slowly made their way to the underground garage, she found herself immensely grateful to the darkened cover of that concrete shield for hiding her tear streaked face. It was all she could do to make it to the safety of the vehicle. As soon as she seated herself, her body had given out, she was exhausted. All her thoughts to talk to Heero would have to wait. She couldn't even expend the energy to keep her eyes open.

Watching her sleep and just being near her was something he had dreamed about. Her scent was still intoxicating, the same as always…so uniquely her. Her scent had often found him in bleak moments. He was certain it kept him sane in less than ideal times.

His primal urges for her had not diminished either. Since he had awoke, all he had wanted to do was show her just how much he had missed her. Even after learning all that transpired while he was away, he still wanted her…in some ways, he wanted her even more. His instinctual need to reclaim his wife as his was indescribable. But…Trowa. It had him questioning everything.

He watched as her chest lightly rose and fell with her even breaths. The moonlight bathing her in its' frosty glow, accentuating her beautiful face and form. He imagined her pregnant with his child…the child he had just found out he had sired. Thinking about her doing it alone, without him, quite frankly…hurt like hell.

It was bad enough to know Trowa had taken advantage of his wife, but the unmitigated rage that coursed through him when he believed that Relena had a baby with Trowa…the only other time he had experienced such rage was with the Zero system. It was unsettling.

0101010101

Tearing his attention away from the slumbering blond, he noticed the gate of the estate coming into view. He recalled when these gates appeared to him as a measure to keep him out. He almost chuckled. Back then, he had believed nothing could honestly keep him from her. When they had married, this grand palace had become their not so humble abode. Now, it just felt as if he were coming home. The very thought of the word sent embers through his heart in a warming sensation. The gates that had once seemed so entirely unforgiving, were now completely welcoming.

As the car pulled into the circle drive, he could see Pagan exiting the front door to meet them.

Part of him wanted to pick up his bride and carry her into the house, yet the other part of him struggled with the idea. Honestly, he wasn't entirely sure how he felt about that, and furthermore he wasn't sure how she would feel about it either. So, he opted for a light shaking to rouse her.

"Relena, we're here."

She stirred from her sleep and was clearly startled, yet just as quickly, she was relieved to see Heero still there. She had to keep reminding herself that she was no longer dreaming. As soon as elation filled her heart, the realization that they hadn't talked or sorted through any of the major issues still hanging over their heads brought her crashing back down to earth. He was alive, back with her and home. He would finally meet their son. The thoughts now flooding her mind must have been evident, as his eyes now reflected her emotions.

She didn't trust her voice, so she only nodded.

As they exited the vehicle, Pagan walked swiftly toward them.

"Welcome home, Miss Relena. And may I just say, Master Yuy, I am so pleased to have you back home."

Relena could have laughed, she didn't recall ever witnessing Pagan so excited. If she didn't know any better, she could swear he wanted to hug Heero. Or perhaps, her overly tired mind was playing tricks on her.

Yet, even in her exhausted state, she noticed that Heero appeared almost as happy to see Pagan as well. It truly warmed her heart.

As they made their way into the foyer, Pagan spoke with enthusiasm.

"Miss, I hope it is agreeable that I relieved Bridgett? I assure you, Jonah is sound asleep. Bridgett has an early doctor's appointment tomorrow morning before she arrives here. She was happy to stay, but I felt it best to let her go."

As always, the mere mention of her son seemed to put her in a happy trance. She let out a giggle in both exhaustion and joy at the thought of her baby boy.

"Pagan, that is quite alright. I am just sad to have missed mine and Jonah's nightly routine. I will go check on him now. Thank you so much, for everything, Pagan." She aimed a very pointed look at the white haired man upon the utterance of the word "everything".

It didn't escape Heero's attention as his feet automatically propelled him forward to follow his blond up the stairs.

0101010101

Even in her exhaustion, mom mode took over. In an effort not to wake her son, she somehow found the strength to move stealthily into his room. Her breath never ceased to catch at the sight of him. The moon appeared to be caressing his little form so lovingly. His little body slack in slumber, his tiny hands twitched with dreams she could only imagine. The smile on her lips met the silent tears of joy currently trailing from her eyes. "My precious baby boy, my little man…I am sorry we didn't get to share our evening routine, but…" her whisper found itself caught on the emotion now threatening to choke her. "Y…Your father has come home." She could scarcely form the words, giving just enough voice to consider them audible. Her silent sobs threatened to take hold of her body and she knew it was time to leave. She didn't dare risk waking him.

0101010101

He found his usual quick steps to be slowing as he fell behind her, watching as she hastily made her way up the grand staircase. If he hadn't been so enthralled by the fact that she was on her way to see their child...his son, he would have been completely captivated by her firm round ass moving with every step, so tantalizingly in front of him. However, the shocking matter of his being a father and having a child took precedence. It was something he never really gave much thought to and he certainly never dreamed he would return to an unknown child.

He saw her disappear into a door, and he knew that was where their son slept. The mere thought made his heart beat faster. He had been fully prepared to follow her into the room, but something stopped him at the door. As if walking past that threshold made the information real and irrefutable. He shook his head; it was all rather ridiculous. Walking through a door had no bearing on the matter. It was real whether he walked into that room or not. That very realization hit him once more…he was, in fact, a father.

As he stood there contemplating the effort it would take to move his feet forward, he heard her whispered thoughts. A normal man could never hear such low speech, but he was the antithesis of normal. His ears, along with every other part of his body, had always seemed to snap to attention at the mere sound of her voice, no matter the level or tone. When she sobbed through saying 'your father has come home,' it was like a wrecking ball hitting him in the stomach. Hearing her tumultuous sob as she spoke the words into existence, it momentarily overtook his senses.

0101010101

"Master Yuy, are you quite alright?"

The sound of Pagan's concerned voice brought him out of his emotional trance, alerting him to the fact that he had been clutching the door frame with such force that his knuckles were now white and the wood was starting to give way under his strength.

As he turned to address the elderly man, Relena was backing out of the door of which he had still not removed himself.

She yelped at the surprise of feeling his chiseled body up against her again. His hand catching her from falling from her shock.

Feeling the soft supple form of his wife under his hands again was something he had dreamed about for the last two years. She was still the Goddess he remembered, only now, all that lay between them was tainted with confusion and doubt.

"It's alright, Relena. It's me," he whispered.

Her eyes shot to him and the mix of emotions swirling in her ocean orbs seized his heart. They both appeared unable to pry their gaze away from one another. Yet, the clearing of Pagan's throat effectively broke the spell, a fact that was both sad as well as a relief.

"Miss, I have reopened you and Master Yuy's room. The maids cleaned and aired out the space, as well as fitted the bed with new sheets. All of your things have been moved from the spare bedroom." He bowed before walking away, leaving them alone.

Heero couldn't be certain, but he thought he heard a tone of caution in Pagan's voice. Although, there was another thought more pressing at the moment. The knowledge that Relena had not used their room with Trowa, did provide him some comfort.

Lost in his thoughts, Relena had slipped from his loose hold. Regardless of how lost in thought he might have been, it did not escape his attention of how quickly she seemed to move away from him. As if his touch burned her…or perhaps he was just imagining her reaction.

He watched her walk, sluggishly as if her body might drop at any moment. Every fiber of his being wanted to scoop her up and carry her the rest of the way, just like he did when they were first married. But, now, things were so completely different, so uncertain. He hated it. It was as if every step down that hall built the tension that wasn't being addressed between them. Before, he would have called her out, and she would have fought him tooth and nail. They would have gone round and round and ended up naked and sweaty reveling in the afterglow of angry makeup sex. Thinking of her naked, writhing beneath him, screaming his name…he shook his head, that wouldn't help anything right now. Being several steps behind her, he noticed that she paused at the door.

Her feet carried her to that familiar door, a place she hadn't visited in so long, her entire body halting at the wooden portal, her breath hitched, her heart rate increasing. She had not visited this room in what felt like eons. Before Une had made her decision on Heero, it had been a comfort to her to sleep in their room. But, once Heero had been declared deceased, seeing his vacate side of the bed was like a knife to her heart every time her eyes landed on the sheets that no longer held his warmth. She could no longer look at the empty side of his bed, knowing he would never return to it, and never return to her. So, she had started sleeping in their son's room. It was only when her and Trowa had started…their…well she really wasn't sure what to call it. Just thinking about it now made her sick. The love of her life, her husband, the father of her child was standing so close to her she could once again fell his heat, his warmth. And was that his breath upon her neck? Or was she imagining things again? Her hand was shaking as she reached for the door handle. As it swung inward, it was as if every memory, every moment, every sensual remembrance came rushing back like a mental battering ram. For just a moment, she couldn't breathe as the recollections flooded her mind and heart.

He noticed every reaction, every hitch in her breath, and the shake in her hands as she reached to open the door. He found himself wanting nothing more than to go to her, comfort her and take it all away as he had done so many times before. But things were no longer so simple. It was all so damn complicated now.

Knowing he was there, right behind her, she found herself wishing he would reach out to her and comfort her the way he did so long ago. Yet, on the other hand, there was a part of her that didn't want that at all. The all-consuming guilt that was violently blooming within the smallest part of her soul was undeniable…a horrible thought taunting her now...what if he truly didn't want her anymore? The fear now taking her over made the decision for both of them…she nearly ran to the seclusion of the bathroom, closing and locking the door.

He watched her, entranced by her beauty, all the while being hit over and over by the waves of distress rolling off of her, slamming into him with the intent to drown him. He didn't just notice her distress; he felt her distress. It had always been that way between them. They were inexplicably connected…and that clearly hadn't changed in the time they had been apart.

The water from the shower intertwined with her tears, and she hoped the sound of the falling drops might disguise her sobs. She prayed that perhaps the water could wash away at least some of the emotional filth that she now felt had cloaked her soul. She was curled up on the floor of the shower, hugging her knees in a pathetic attempt to keep herself from falling apart. This day had started so well. She had felt it was a new beginning, yet it had ended in a miracle wrapped in heart wrenching complication. But she supposed it actually was a new beginning, only with an old familiar book that didn't have all the pages filled in yet…or more specifically…pages that had yet to be revealed.

He stood there, transfixed by the wooden barrier between him and the love of his life, the mother of his child, the woman that had visited his dreams and aided him in keeping his sanity over the last 2 years. Now, she was hiding from him. It did no good, though, when you knew a person's soul. At this moment, he cursed his exceptional hearing. He could clearly make out the sobs she was attempting to keep from his ears. It was the same as before; hearing her in pain and knowing she was in pain never ceased to make his heart ache. He could never stand to witness her hurting. He'd self-detonate all over again if it meant he could take it all away from her.

Making his way through the room they had shared, what felt like an eternity ago, it was as if nothing had changed. And yet, everything had changed. As he made his way to their bed, the bed they had shared, the images of their physical love washed over him like an exotic baptism. He sat there reveling in the memories that no one could take away from him, the memories that no doubt had aided in keeping him alive and fighting to get back to her. A soft knock on the door reluctantly pulled him from his reverie.

Heero made his way to the source of the intrusion to his memories, and found Pagan standing on the other side of the door.

"Master Yuy, please forgive me. It slipped my mind earlier, but here you are. I kept it for you as requested."

Pagan handed Heero a small velvet box, bowed, turned and walked away without another word.

Where that small velvet box should have felt light, in that moment, that innocent looking box felt like an anvil in his hand. He stood in the doorway as he slowly opened the lid, the light catching the gunmetal inside. It was his wedding band; he always took it off for safety reasons before a mission. His memory thinking back of the first week long mission he had accepted when they had first married. He gave his wedding ring to Relena, or tried to give it to her, and it thoroughly pissed her off. It resulted in a fight and her kicking them out of their bedroom. Not exactly the send-off a soldier wants when going on a mission. After that, he had decided that Pagan was the best choice to hold onto his ring. Not only could he trust the man, but it prevented Relena from becoming angry with him and incurring other undesirable side effects as a result. After 2 plus years, Pagan had faithfully held onto the metal circlet of love from his wife. It was both wonderful and terrifying. Part of him wanted to immediately put the ring back on and never take it off, but the other part of him wasn't sure...what if she no longer wished to be married to him? That thought alone pained his heart unlike any other in his life.

He didn't know how or when he had made it to the dresser, but there he stood, looking at his own reflection in the mirror. In this moment he didn't know if he even recognized himself. He opened up the top right hand drawer, finding his clothes still there, as if he had never left. Hearing the water from the shower turn off, he quickly placed the velvet box under a stack of his clothes and hastily shut the drawer.

As he was about to start walking back towards the bed, he heard the bathroom door open and when he looked toward it, his heart stopped.

Her legs and arms were bare, her hair damp and hanging straight down covering her shoulders, and her body was covered in nothing more than a towel. The light mingled with the steam as it danced around her as if she were an ethereal creature not of this world.

"I…I forgot to grab my nightgown." As she disappeared into the closet, he had to fight the urge to follow her and relieve her of the towel or the need for any clothes.

Did he nod? Did he respond to her statement whatsoever? He was pretty sure that he just stood there mesmerized by her intoxicating presence.

Relena didn't miss the look of unmistakable desire on Heero's face as she emerged from her shower. It provided her with hope that he might not be completely disgusted by her or her actions after-all. That look was the same look that never ceased to bring heat to her cheeks, not to mention other areas. This time was quite nearly the same, yet her guilt was poisoning what should have been a blissful reunion. They should be celebrating his return, reintroducing themselves to each other's bodies and rechristening their bed. The thought of their bed sent a shiver through her entire being.

Would he still want to share a bed with her? The memories of their last night together came rushing back without warning, the images had her trembling with need…until memories of her and Trowa started to infiltrate her memories of her and Heero. That sick feeling came over her once more as her legs gave out. She once again found herself hugging her knees as the tears threatened to fall yet again. Only this time she was having to push the images of her and Trowa away. She didn't want them defiling the sacred memories of her and her husband. The fact that she was responsible for creating the memories in the first place, that alone made this so much more difficult in her mind. Now that he was back, she honestly couldn't remember why she had invited Trowa into her bed? Why she had even entertained the idea in the first place? And why the hell she had try to make a relationship with him? The very idea that such memories even existed due to her actions, the fact that those recollections now threatened to taint the memories of her and Heero, the fact that she hurt Heero...was devastating.

He had been watching the closet door as if it were fascinating. She had been in there longer than he would have thought necessary. He was being pulled to go to her, but his uncertainty in this entire situation was stopping him. That alone was starting to drive him crazy. This wasn't them. This wasn't how they worked. This wasn't how it was ever supposed to be. So much had happened between them, and she didn't even know the whole story.

She felt his presence before she heard him. She was still hugging her knees, not even caring that her towel wasn't covering everything. Then a thought occurred to her - why should she honestly care? He was her husband, the father of their child, the love of her life. He was her fucking soulmate for Christ's sake! He had taken her more times than she could count. He had come to know her body just as well as he knew her soul. Suddenly, an ugly thought crept into her mind as she remembered that her body had changed since childbirth. That, combined with her guilt, had her previously rising confidence shrinking back into the abyss from which it had emerged and burned brightly for only a few fleeting moments.

He noticed her shrinking behavior and it both broke his heart as well as angered him. Was he not still her husband? Did she not love him anymore? He longed for the days when she would walk around him freely, in not a stitch of clothing. How she insatiably craved him, as he did her, as if they were each other's oxygen. All the glorious innumerable times he would wake to find her riding his morning arousal. She was no shrinking violet. This wasn't her and this wasn't him…this corruption didn't belong within their union.

"Relena."

Just him speaking her name was like a baptism by fire. It said so much, more than could ever possibly be translated, deciphered or explained. It filled her soul with love and now, unfortunately…lament.

"H…Heero…I'm at a loss...I don't know what to say and I don't know...what to do about it?"

"Relena, I need to tell you what happened...everything."

That honestly wasn't what she expected to hear from him, but she had to agree. She absolutely needed to hear why their lives had been torn apart and turned inside out. She deserved to know why he went on that mission, despite her fierce mere thought had her guilt taking a backseat, as an old anger quickly resurfaced. That anger now had her standing before him, her usual armor of strength firmly in place.

"Yes, Heero, I agree. You absolutely need to tell me just why the hell you left me?!"

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**Whew! That was an emotional one! But this emotional roller coaster doesn't stop here.**

**The next chapter is the big reveal! What could have possibly keep the perfect soldier away for two years.**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you to my AMAZING betas Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and Wings Landing…y'all are my besties and betas and sanity in the rough seas of FF.**

**Everyone should check out their fanfic stories, they are AWESOME!**

**Also, Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and myself have a group page with group projects and the name is Elite SquadB. There is a really cool Sailor Moon Wonderland story on the page with many more awesome stories in the works for the page as well.**

**So, check it all out! Hehe! #FanFicIsLife**

**Thank you to all of the lovely readers and reviewers and favorites and follows! I hope you enjoy this wild ride! Thank you again for the support!**


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

**A/N So, just for the purposes of this story, I feel I must point out that Heero never made the promise not to kill anymore. I personally believe that while he wouldn't want to kill anymore, in his line of work, it is unreasonable to think that the necessity to kill wouldn't arise at some point. So, he would in fact have to kill again…if for no other reason than for the greater good. I mean, he is the perfect soldier and the perfect killing machine and let's face it folks, you wouldn't take the paint brush away from Picasso, right? So, why take away one of the perfect soldier's greatest talents? In this story, you don't.**

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"Relena, it's my job…"

"I KNOW it's your JOB, Heero! That is NOT what I mean and you damn well know it!" She had found her way back into the obscurity of her closet, discarding her towel and donning her pink plush robe, angrily yanking on the belt to secure it. "I told you before you left, Heero...I TOLD YOU! I had a bad feeling about that mission! Yet, you dismissed me and went anyway?!" She was pointing her finger like a sword aimed directly at his heart.

The ire she had held onto, locked away within her soul all this time, came bursting forth like water breaking free of a dam. It was finally out and there was no putting it back. She didn't want to put it back. In this instance, she was thoroughly enjoying not feeling in the wrong, a feeling she had unfortunately become all too acquainted with as of late.

"I went to protect you…"

"Damnit, Heero! You are ALWAYS protecting me! That is always your reasoning!" While she normally never considered herself one to raise her voice, this time it felt downright cathartic.

"No, Relena…you don't understand!" He was surprised as his voice was rising to match her angry tone. It was something he never enjoyed doing, but right now, he felt as if had no choice. She was understandably angry, but she didn't have all of the information. "Relena! Please listen to me!" His voice lowered, going from angry to nearly pleading. His feet moved him forward, whether he consciously allowed it or not, he always just inherently craved being within her gravitational pull.

Hearing him yell was not something she was accustomed to. It was unsettling, but somewhere within her rational mind, she knew if he felt the need to raise his voice, especially to her, there had to be a good reason. That alone created a frigid feeling settling within her. Whether she was in the mood to hear this story or not, she knew she needed to know what happened. An explanation was the least she deserved at this point.

"Relena, it was a routine mission, to protect you, the entire world and peace as we know it."

"I know that's what you told me, Heero." The bite in her voice did not escape him. It brought back memories of the night he had first told her he was taking this Godforsaken mission.

FLASHBACK:

" _Relena!?" You know I have to go!" He yelled in a voice he thought he only reserved for Duo. That alone made him angrier knowing he was using it on her._

" _Heero, that's bullshit! You can pick and choose your missions when necessary! I am telling you I have an extremely bad feeling about this and I am…" She halted her speech as she got down on her knees in front of him and clasped her hands together as if she were praying. "Please, don't go." The emotion welled up in her eyes as she appealed to his weakness for her._

_Every fiber of his being wanted to comply, to agree, to pull her up and kiss her senseless and then show her how sorry he was for causing her tears. Truth be told, he had a bad feeling as well. But he would be damned if he let anyone hurt her, especially if he could neutralize the threat. He stood firm, going into perfect soldier mode. He had to do this, it was for her and the world they had created._

_Her eyes flashed pain and pure animosity. That look might as well have been a bullet shattering his heart._

" _Fine. THAT'S JUST FUCKING FINE, HEERO! You go off and leave me…AGAIN!" She choked through her now freely falling tears as she stormed up the stairs and slammed their bedroom door._

END OF FLASHBACK

Fortunately, he had given her a week advanced notice to his departure and by the last night, she had let him back into their bed. After the ring debacle, she had promised she would never let him leave again without a proper send-off. Recalling that last night together…he knew it was one of the things that had kept him fighting. It was a mixture of angry, make-up and send-off sex…it was incredible. Now that he knew it had resulted in their child, it was just that much…more.

Coming out of his trance he found an expectant looking Relena.

Closing his eyes, he took a breath in an effort to rein in the storm of emotions threatening to spiral out of control.

Oce he had opened his eyes, Relena was stunned by the raw emotion that swirled within the depths of his Prussian blue orbs, as if he were willing her to understand by sheer force.

"It was categorized as routine, in and out. But, when I got there…" his voice stopped completely.

Her eyes softened, the troubled deep blue of his gaze rocked her to her core; although her anger stubbornly held her resolve firmly in place. The anguish in his voice made her heart race as the bad feeling she experienced earlier resurfaced. Her breath was adopting a quicker pace as well, her heart squeezed with the anticipation of his impending words.

"Relena, it was Dr. J…" The gasp that left her lips was a surprise to even her, as she recalled the man that had raised Heero to be a perfect weapon, putting him through sheer hell in the process.

"More accurately, it was his insane protégé."

At this point Relena's voice was lost to her shock. She heard the words, but lacked the ability to comprehend them. Despite noticing her confusion, Heero was also aware that he had her full attention, so he continued.

"When Dr. J died…his…protégé decided to take up his cause…but in a rather twisted way. According to Dr. J's journals, I…was his greatest achievement...and his fucked up disciple was determined to carry on his mission." He looked at her as if the next words might break her. "They used you as a way to get to me. They knew you were the only one to get me there. To draw me in…to trap me."

He was correct, she felt a fracture, ripping at the edges of her already fragile soul. Relena's voice was caught between silence and screaming. Her heart constricted. It was seized half in her former anger and half in her current pain of knowing he went on her behalf only to be trapped…because…of her.

The look on her face had him fighting the urge to pull her into his arms, but instead he took her silence as encouragement to continue. If he didn't tell her soon, he knew he might lose his ability all together.

"I was used as a…" his voice faltered, a trait that certainly wasn't something she had ever expected from her perfect soldier. It made her heart stop cold, for one frightening moment.

"Their plan…was to use me as a guinea pig…to create a race of perfect soldiers." He said it quickly as if perhaps saying it fast might make the words somehow less painful or less true. She wasn't certain, but she honestly thought she heard shame seep into his voice. As if he were taking the blame for such a diabolical plan. Part of her wanted nothing more than to reach out to him and comfort him, but her anger combined with the need to hear this story, stopped her.

At the same time, without lending consent to the action, her lips betrayed her resolve as she gasped. Her heart hurt at the mere thought of such an atrocious idea, a shiver running through her in uncontrollable fury.

After a moment of contemplating the horror of his words, despite her inner turmoil, she forced herself to speak. A question had been haunting her since the hospital.

"Heero…at the hospital…when Sally threatened to sedate you?"

The shudder that ran through him was unmistakable. It was as if he were physically recoiling from her question. Their connection had not been severed. In some ways, it was stronger than ever. A corresponding shiver shot through her heart mirroring him in that moment.

He seemed to look ashamed as his head turned away, in a futile attempt to hide his expression from her. But she had already seen it, and it was as if an arrow had pierced through her soul. Her pulse quickened as she dreaded, yet anticipated, the next words to fall from his lips.

"Relena… At first…they had tried to keep me hostage, but they quickly learned that wasn't really possible. So…they…cryogenically froze me."

The sound that escaped her body was a mixture of gasp and strangled scream. She couldn't control it, she couldn't stop it, and her vision blurred as emotion started to flood her. Her body failed her as her knees started to buckle under the soul crushing weight of his words, yet she did not meet the floor as expected. Instead, she found herself enveloped in the secure embrace of her husband's powerful arms.

He automatically caught her, taking the opportunity to hold her once again, while gently sinking with her to the carpet as he held her in both sorrow and love.

"Oh…Heero…I…what…how? Oh my God!?" Her sobs came in waves. While he didn't want her being in pain because of him, he couldn't help the fact that having her in his arms, for any reason, was pure heaven. The soft supple form of his wife had filled his dreams and kept him going. The love of his life was the only heaven he knew, needed or wanted.

No one could hold her like Heero. No one had his warmth, his strength…it was all just so uniquely him. No matter her anger, the fact still remained…in a way...he would always irrevocably be hers and she…his.

The feelings coursing through her were unlike anything she knew…or would ever manage to equate to anything that could ever be of this world or any other plain of existence for that matter. As they held each other, familiar feelings came rushing back, as if nothing had changed and no time had passed. Their love was indescribable, exquisite and untouchable...or so she had always believed.

"Relena…I wasn't able to get back to you, but I never stopped trying. Even in my unconscious state, my soul still cried out to you."

At the mention of his soul crying out to her, she knew her soul had been doing the same. It was a feeling of elation laced with pure guilt.

"He kept me...incapacitated for a little over a year, until he realized he wasn't acquiring the results that he wanted. He woke me about 6 months ago and the tests continued. It was all far too reminiscent of Dr. J…only…worse." The audible break in his voice was clear, as he spoke in barely a whisper, but she heard it. The anguish emanating from him threatened to break her very soul.

"They…kept me...sedated."

Suddenly, it all made sense. When Sally threatened to sedate him, and his fight drained from him in an instant, it all clicked in her brain now. He had been tortured through sedation. The mere thought threatened to destroy what little control she had left, as she struggled to hold herself together.

"He wanted nothing more than to keep me compliant to their will; and to be the alpha to an army of clones...an army of perfect soldiers."

The very thought had her heart pounding in fear. The idea of there being an army cloned from Heero…it was positively world ending.

"D…Did he succeed?" The fear of such a possibility evident in her voice.

"No, I made sure of that." The relief at that fact was clear, but it still didn't cover the pain lurking beneath his words. "The experiments were…" his voice cracked again and she could see that visible shiver run through him once more.

She didn't like this; she wasn't used to seeing him so vulnerable. Not like this. Not in regards to his work. She didn't like the idea that someone could break him this way. It caused an icy sliver to lodge itself into her heart. She feared that icy shard could grow into the first inklings of non-pacifism. The mere concept caused her to shudder as she attempted to push it from her mind.

Heero felt her body convulse at his words, his hands holding her tighter in response.

"W…What…did they...do?"

Heero shook his head. His eyes were sad yet fierce as if burning in the fires of his own personal hell.

Her words instantly died on her tongue. She knew, while he would not lie to her, he also would be taking the details of his captivity to his grave. Just like his time with the Zero system, he would never breathe a word of it. She was painfully aware that this too would be buried right next to Zero within the graveyard of his soul, until the day death freed him of the burden.

Once upon a time, his non-divulging nature had bothered her. But soon she came to understand that, at times, such measures were necessary. Some stories were not meant to be told and some stories honestly weren't able to be put into words. His time with the Zero system was one of those stories and now…so was this. In truth, there was a part of her that didn't want to know. She had been through so much while he was gone and she wasn't sure if her heart could take the details of his captivity.

Discovering her voice, she asked the obvious next question. "How did you escape?"

His eyes flashed that all too familiar streak of confidence and determination that she knew so well.

"During the moments of being awake and the strenuous tests, I had started to talk to the peon that was keeping me sedated. He was apparently starved for conversation. I used that to my advantage and he kept me awake longer and longer each time. Due to all of the enhancements from Dr. J, my body was still in top physical condition. It was just getting my bearings long enough to find an opening. One day, I found that opportunity." He stopped, she could tell he didn't really want to share the next part with her, but she needed to hear him say it. Her sensibilities be damned! She wanted to hear the lengths he went to, in order to return to her. She knew it was childish and selfish, but in this instance, she didn't care.

As if reading her mind, he continued.

"Xavier's lackey…"

"Xavier?" Relena voiced in confusion.

"That was Dr. J's protégé."

Relena didn't dare give voice to her response as she only nodded in acknowledgement, silently urging him to continue.

"Xavier's brilliant gopher, I only knew him by the name Shaw. He was a genius, but solely in his field of expertise. Outside of that, he was…a rather daft man. He was so desperate for human interaction, it didn't take long to lure him into a false sense of security. It was really rather sad. Had he not been holding me captive, I might have shown mercy."

The emotion surging through him now was palpable. She knew what was coming. She knew what he was going to say. No matter how many times she told herself it was for the greater good, her pacifist side tugged at her heart. Although, since Jonah had come along, she saw her protective side come out more often. The idea that these people kept her husband from her, Jonah's father from him, tearing their family apart and used her as the way to make it happen…it was enough to make what he was about to say…more acceptable. The mama bear in her was strong and at the moment, she found a side of her longing for him to say the words that were forthcoming. She wanted to hear that justice had been served at the hands of her very talented husband.

Heero noticed the fear, emotion and then the ferocity flash in her eyes, and in that, he found the strength to continue.

"I had managed to get my hands free of the restraints, unbeknownst to Shaw. When he came close enough, the frailty of the man allowed me to easily overpower him and…" He paused as he looked at her, ready to see fear and pain in her ocean orbs, but all he found there was acceptance and even more surprising...anticipation of his words.

"I was able to grab the needle, he was going to use on me, sedate him and then I…suffocated him." He wasn't certain, but he swore he could see a type of satisfaction flash across her face as he spoke of his unpleasant deed.

The fact that he managed to get some kind of revenge on the bastard keeping him sedated, was more gratifying than she could have imagined. It was refreshing and startling all at the same time.

"What about Xavier?" As the monster's name, that orchestrated this whole mess, left her tongue, she could see the anger and disgust take over Heero's features.

Heero couldn't help the shudder that went through him at the sound of that assholes name. But even in his twisted thoughts of that monster, he couldn't help but notice Relena licking her lips in her readiness to hear the fate that befell him at his hands. It was a side of Relena, no matter how small, he never expected to witness. But some tiny part of him liked it, if for no other reason than to have a miniscule piece of her that could fully understand that forever blackened part of himself.

"I knew Xavier would come to check on me, or more less check and make sure I was still under his control. When he came to the room, I trapped him between the doorframe and the door, maneuvered his neck into position, cutting off any attempt to yell…and then the crunch of his neck…I won't lie, it was satisfying." His voice was a mixture of victorious and angry.

She was a pacifist, but she had been through war and right now, just knowing that horrible man was no longer a threat to them, or anyone else for that matter, was thoroughly rewarding.

"Xavier and Shaw were the main ones on base and there were a few other lost souls following Xavier's manifesto. He was the epitome of a mad professor, with the mentality of a cult leader. He was hell bent on conquering the world with clones from my DNA. But even after waking me, he still didn't get his results. Every failed experiment dropped him further into the depths of madness. As I navigated my way out of that hell hole, I found that he had so many masses of half failed and attempted clones in jars and incubation pods. It was destestible and gruesome to know that my DNA created such loathsome abominations." His voice cracked yet again and she trembled at the picture he painted with his words. His face turned from her in what could only be described as pure disgrace.

Taking hold of his face, she forced him to look at her. "Heero, you are not to blame for any of Xavier's demented plans. NONE OF IT! DO YOU HEAR ME?" He seemed to somewhat emerge from the internal fires he was burning in and find her eyes. "Furthermore, you seem to forget, I happen to have a living example of your DNA, and believe me, he is marvelous." The pure conviction and love she exhibited instantly healed a piece of his soul. He almost smiled as he found the strength to continue.

"Before making my escape, I rigged explosives and blew up the entire base. There was no other choice except to leave no survivors. They were too dangerous and far too mentally gone to be reasoned with. I couldn't have them coming back or trying to hurt you. I took the shuttle they had, but unfortunately, it only made it to the abandoned colony that Duo had found me on.

She couldn't help but notice the grave tone in his voice. She found herself just staring at him, still encircled in his strong embrace, just watching as he came back down from the emotions of his horrific tale.

His gaze found hers as their eyes locked, their heads moving in slow motion as they were inching towards each other. Lips centimeters from a reunion of two souls…then a cry broke out through the little monitor sitting on the nightstand.

Relena pulled away, completely knocked out of her trance, jumping up as she practically ran from him…no, not from him, but to their son.

Hearing his son's cry over the monitor caused a confusing flurry of emotions to course through him. Going from aroused to perplexed and now…he wasn't entirely sure what feeling was blooming within him…love, pride, concern? His feet began to move towards the source of the sound, picking up the little white monitor. He felt the need to be there, be with his family… _to meet his son._

Relena raced to Jonah's room. She was both irritated, yet relieved for the distraction. She still had so much guilt from her time with Trowa and now she was overwhelmed with the information Heero had just shared. Her son didn't usually wake in the middle of the night, but he seemed to have the same sixth sense like his father. He could sense when things were different. The air had shifted upon Heero's return and her son was aware of it…or perhaps he just wanted to meet his father.

As the thought passed through her mind, she heard the door open. She knew the man she had just been thinking about had entered the room. His energy was unmistakable. It never ceased to grab her attention and make her tremble with need, even now. He still undoubtedly had that effect on her…only now, it intermingled with her guilt and uncertainty. She pushed it all away. She had to focus on her son and introduce him to his father. This was a moment she had dreamed about; wished and longed for…and while this wasn't how she envisioned it, she was grateful that it was finally happening.

He heard her talking to their son in a hushed whisper, her voice calming the previous boisterous yell coming from the boy. He could relate. Relena's voice often times calmed him as well. Walking into the room, he could sense her tense at his presence, another stab to his heart. Her back was still turned to him when he noticed his own eyes staring back at him and his heart jolted. His feet automatically moving him towards mother and child. The eyes of his son held innocence, curiosity and wonder…and those eyes instantly captured his heart. He never knew he could hold so much love for someone he had just met. Relena had been the only one to show him love and teach him how to love and she had achieved that once again by having their child. Her soft voice brought him out of his hypnotic state.

"Jonah, I'd like you to meet…your…father." Her voice sounded both happy and pained, as if she were on the verge of tears. He could only hope they were happy tears.

Jonah still hadn't taken his eyes off of him and Heero now understood how it felt to have his own gaze upon him. Of course the little one lacked the death in his stare, but the intensity of the child's gaze would probably be unnerving to a lesser man. One of Jonah's chubby little hands reached out to him and he found himself instinctually reaching forward to take hold of him.

Relena watched as father and son appeared completely enthralled by one another. She lifted him upward as he took hold of the little one, and while it was a beautiful moment, it equally created the slightest pang of jealousy as her son seemed fascinated by the man who was now holding him. It had always been just her and Jonah and their special bond. Now she had to share him with Heero. She shook her head to dispel the ugly feeling creeping over her. This was what she had wanted since she had found out she was pregnant; to share this experience with him. Now her wish was coming true. She wouldn't allow such a selfish and irrational thought to ruin the moment.

The little boy stared at the man and the man stared at the little boy. They were positively entranced by one another. Then came a shrill squeal as a projectile came flying in from the corner of his eye, held by the chubby hand of his son. The mastery of Heero's reflexes allowed him to dodge the incoming missile with ease, as his eyes landed on the intrusion. A teddy bear, no… _the_  teddy bear that he had given Relena on her 16th birthday. It was worn with time, and now use from their son. It warmed his heart to know that his son, in a way, had a piece of him…and from the looks of it…it was something he cherished…just as Relena had.

His eyes found their way to his wife. She was fixated on their son. The smile that graced her features as she lightly laughed at his antics gave him his first true glimpse into her persona as a mother. It was yet another thing to love about her. She caught him looking at her and immediately dropped her gaze, as if she were embarrassed to show him this side of herself. It was disheartening and alarming. It hurt him that she wished to hide from him in any respect, but mostly it just amplified his doubts to the status of their relationship. The laugh of his son brought his attention back to the lively little boy.

"Bu, bu, bu, buuuub, bub, bub." The Prussian blue eyed boy chanted his favorite word.

"What does that mean?" Heero asked inquisitively.

Relena had come to stand by him, taking hold of their son.

"That is his word for food. He is always hungry." She laughed as her son swung around his beloved bear. "He's got an insatiable appetite."

The thought gave Heero a surge of pride that his son had such a healthy appetite. It might be a strange thought, but when you grow up on military rations and strict diets that could barely be considered edible, it was nice to see his son didn't have to live that way.

Relena was now holding onto her cheerful little man like a lifeline. For just a moment, she was lost in the idea that they were a happy little family. But they weren't. They still had so many issues yet to work through.

Once again, her voice brought him out of his thoughts.

"Heero…" The serious tone in her voice made his stomach drop.

She still had her back turned to him.

"I think it best if we don't share a room right now. I need...some time."

She might as well have punched him. Once more, his doubts intensified. Yet, even with his raging emotions swirling through him like a sandstorm…his face showed no sign of it.

She was feeling insecure, guilty, confused and all she wanted to do was fall back into her safety net…with her son. The irony was not lost on her. She had spent so many nights in Jonah's room just to feel closer to the man she had lost; yet now he was here and she couldn't bring herself to share their bed. She felt utterly ridiculous, but it's just what she needed at the moment. She knew, or at least she thought she knew, that she had hurt Heero with her statement; but her doubts were just so abundant and growing louder with every second. She just needed to be with her little man right now.

Heero just nodded as he walked out of their son's room, taking one last look at his family before he left. With every step away from them his heart clenched. As he neared the door to their bedroom, he found that he couldn't go in. He knew he couldn't sleep there…not without her. So, he detoured, making his way to the spare bedroom nearest to their room. The room that was actually his upstairs office, and from time to time, the room that had served him well on those rare occasions when Relena had kicked him out of their room. Now that he was home, he felt as if he could actually sleep. It might be restless sleep, but at least this time, he wouldn't be drugged. His mind needed rest. This had been the longest day, and last couple of years, of his life. Just then, another barrage of thoughts hit him like lightning. Was this still his home? Did Relena still want to be his wife? Was this still his life?

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**These two are really letting their emotions and doubts get the best of them huh? Well the next chapter reveals a big reason why. Stay Tuned!**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you to my AMAZING betas Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and Wings Landing…y'all are my besties and betas and sanity in the rough seas of FF. Everyone should check out their fanfic stories, they are AWESOME!**

**Also, Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and myself have a group page with group projects and the name is Elite SquadB. There is a really cool Sailor Moon Wonderland story on the page with many more awesome stories in the works for the page as well. So, check it all out! Hehe! #FanFicIsLife**

**Thank you to all of the lovely readers and reviewers and favorites and follows! I hope you enjoy this wild ride! Thank you again for the support!**


	12. Chapter 12

**I own nothing except for my original characters.**

**Buckle up, this ride isn't over. Haha!**

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Chapter 12

Even as weary as his mind and body were, sleep was intermittent at best, like a nightmare he couldn't escape. His mind tortured him, replaying the moments of hell he had endured during his captivity. Whether conscious or not, all he had wanted was to be home, with his wife. Now, that he was home, so much had happened that she once again banished him from their bed. But then again, she wasn't even in their bed at the moment either. No, she was down the hall, with their son.

Thinking of his son now brought both pain and joy. He was happy to be back with his family, but the knowledge of just how much he had missed in his son's young life brought up his own parentage…or lack thereof. He shook his head to clear the errant thought. That was certainly not something even his brain could deal with at the moment. He already had too many other things weighing on him, mostly the very question that plagued his heart…did his family still want him? In that one thought, he knew sleep was no longer possible.

Moving through the dark stillness of the hall, he found his feet had carried him to the door that shielded his family from him. He stood there with his hand hovered over the knob, both tempted to go in and yet afraid to enter. His resolve was usually one of clear determination, but this time, he was genuinely uncertain. While he didn't know what to do about that, he did know that he had to do something. Reluctantly backing away from the wooden barrier, he found himself moving downstairs…only realizing his target once he had arrived.

He had made his way to another of his havens, the garage. A feeling of confusion, but mostly relief, greeted him upon finding that everything from his tools to his car were exactly where he left it…as if he had never left. Walking to other baby in his life, he pulled the cover from her glossy exterior, immediately running his hands over the deep blue 69 Shelby Mustang. He had rebuilt her after the war. He recalled how good it felt to work on a machine again. The fact that this car was how he took Relena on their first official date, it had his heart both soaring and crashing in the same instance. Normally, thinking of that date would bring comfort. But since learning of all that had happened during his absence, it brought heartache and…rage. The very idea had him grabbing his keys before he processed his forward trajectory. As he made his way into his affectionately named cockpit, and settled himself onto the supple black leather, he found a note resting on the passenger seat.

_Master Yuy,_

_I hope it's alright that I took the liberty to refuel your car, just in case you are in need of it._

_Your faithful servant and friend,_

_Pagan._

He would have smirked had his anger allowed it. He wasn't sure if the old man would be so supportive if he knew his current plan, but he didn't care. His destination was clear from the very second his rage had consumed him.

The engine roared to life as if mirroring his emotions. Now, a wisp of a smirk did find its way to his lips.

Even with his mission clear, he found himself enjoying the drive, remembering just how much he loved it…driving just to drive. Even with the windows down, he savored the uncomplicated, yet taken for granted, simple pleasure earth so readily provided…the night air whipping by him…something he didn't realize how much he had missed. The welcoming warm blanket of night was so completely different than that of the unforgiving, cold vastness of space. Yet even in his reverie, nothing could completely pull him from the simmering rage that threatened to burn him alive.

Before he could arrive at his chosen destination, he had to first make a stop. Since being debriefed in addition to medically as well as mentally cleared, Une had provided him with all of his previous clearances. It wasn't even something he had asked for. Une just provided it in a very unlike Une fashion. It had struck him as a bit unusual, but honestly, a lot of things seemed a bit odd to him upon his return.

Walking back into the Preventers building, it was amazing how quickly his business acumen took over; instantly taking him back to all the times when he would return from a mission in the middle of the night, only to be stuck there, debriefing until dawn.

The entire place was quiet, running with the usual skeleton crew that was appointed at night, with several others on-call if an emergency were to arise.

The overpowering scent of disinfectant from the cleaning crew assaulted his senses…a part of him wishing the bleach could scrub his memory clean as well.

Making his way down to the basement, where he did his best work, it was all very reminiscent of his life before he no longer had to live within the shadows. With his skilled hand, the screen flared to life and he quickly found what he was looking for…in addition to something else he had not expected. With a restored energy, despite the lateness of the hour and his lack of sleep…he was now headed to his original destination with renewed purpose.

He pulled up to the darkened little house. If he hadn't known better, he would have thought no one lived there. But he knew all too well who dwelled inside that seemingly innocent looking abode.

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A dreamless sleep was usually best, but tonight he tossed and turned with a vengeance. His mind couldn't grasp all that had transpired. It was on his latest restless turn, that he sensed it, but it was too late. He clearly heard the click of a gun that was undoubtedly pointed directly at him.

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Relena was grateful that Heero hadn't pressed the issue of sharing their bed. She couldn't help but notice the hurt that flashed across his features. As much as a part of her longed to comfort him, an even larger part of her wouldn't allow it. She was beyond conflicted and while she knew it was childish to hide behind their son, she didn't fully care. How was she supposed to share a bed with him when her guilt was making it difficult to breathe? The full reality of all she had done was truly setting in. She didn't have a clue how to fix it or how to explain? After everything that had happened, how was she supposed to explain that he honestly was the only one that always had and always would hold her heart? The thought was exasperating, but despite the tormented musings of her mind, sleep eventually found her.

0101010101

He didn't need to inquire; he didn't need to guess, for there was only one man that could make it into his sanctuary as silent as the night itself. No one else, besides him, could make such a stealthy entrance. He decided it best not to raise up or make any sudden movements. No such action was necessary to acknowledge his midnight intruder.

Trowa did not speak, but Heero knew Trowa was aware of his presence.

"Relena? Really, Trowa!? You were supposed to be my friend! I asked you to protect her. Not fuck her! What the hell were you thinking?! Oh, forget it! I know what you were thinking! You'd just slide right into my place, with my wife…raising  _my son_!"

The pure rage rolling off of Heero was staggering. Trowa had never witnessed such outward emotion from the perfect and disciplined soldier. Trowa was about to respond when the next words effectively cut him off.

"And what makes it worse…you knew there was a chance that I might be alive!"

Heero raised the gun again and even in the darkness, Trowa could make out the infinitesimal shake as Heero's entire being reverberated with unbridled fury. Trowa's survival instincts kicked in. He didn't know if he could make it, but he had to try. In what would have taken anyone else more than two seconds, Trowa was off his bed and hurtling toward the seething man. The thud of two bodies colliding, and a gun shot through the elongated barrel of a silencer was all that could be heard.

0101010101

Relena jolted awake, shooting straight up in the bed that had serviced her so well since her son's birth. She was convinced she heard a noise, but Jonah was sound asleep. No, it was more like her heart felt as if it was stinging. But her exhaustion was just as quickly getting the better of her. Sleep deprivation just chalked it up to her guilt as well as her doubt in her ability to make her husband understand her position. She really felt as if her regret might cause her to lose her mind. In pure exasperation, she forced herself to lay back down and was grateful when sleep once again managed to find her, much faster than expected.

0101010101

The bullet missed it's intended target, but the scuffle of two men wrestling for dominance, both struggling with guilt, uncertainty and pain was the opening act to the tortured commentary that followed.

"Are you really going to kill me, Heero?! Is that what you really want?!" Trowa yelled through his struggle to keep the other man from murdering him right then and there.

"How could you?! How long did you have a thing for my wife?! Were you just waiting for me to be out of the way?!"

Trowa was appalled at the words, the question, the implications and now he too, was pissed. Using that as fuel, he found his strength to subdue the irate man.

"Heero! NO! Despite what anyone thinks, I NEVER intentionally started anything with Relena! We were grieving! It just happened! I sure as hell didn't plan it!"

For a moment Heero seemed to calm, but then, just as quickly, the calm was replaced with something frightening. It was enough to make Trowa consider running out of his own house. But even if Trowa were such a coward, he knew that with Heero as the predator, he wouldn't make it very far.

"Honestly, I just need to know one thing. Tell me Trowa…did you sleep with my wife AFTER you knew there was a chance I might still be alive?" The sudden calm emitting from the Prussian blue eyed man was unsettling. Once again everything in Trowa told him to run. But yet again, he knew it was pointless.

Heero just watched as the former Heavy Arms pilot seemed to consider his options. The silence filled the room and it was nearly suffocating. The fact that Trowa didn't immediately deny the accusation...that was Heero's answer.

Once again, the unmistakable sound of a click from a gun could be heard. Trowa looked up to see the glint from Heero's barrel aimed at his heart. Trowa raised his hands, staring at his comrade and former friend; just trying to understand how it had all gone  _so fucking wrong_. But, truthfully, he knew…he got caught up in all that was Relena and their attempting to live without Heero. No one had realized how much Heero had truly brought their group together; the man who saved the Princess and saved the world. The man that had found a way to live beyond the war and inadvertently helped the other pilots find that same path.

With every second that Heero watched the green eyed man, he found it increasingly difficult to pull the trigger, the idea that Relena might love him swimming through his mind and decimating his heart. His hand was once again shaking for the second time tonight, or in all his life for that matter. Never had he ever faltered when aiming a weapon, but the emotions coursing through him now, made it impossible to steady his hand. He felt the tears threatening to claw their way to the surface, but he would be damned if he would show that in front of the man responsible for breaking him…and his world.

Without a word, Heero lowered his gun and walked out, quickly seeking the comfort of night in hopes that it might soothe the shattered feeling within his soul.

In his emotional state, he knew there was only one place he could go that might aid him in getting a grip. He hastily made his way to his beloved car and took off into the night. The drive immediately helped to stabilize him, and before he knew it, he had arrived…at the place where it all started…the beach…their beach.

His super human abilities never allowed for him to stumble, even on sand, but his abilities didn't account for emotions, which were currently getting the better of him. He all but fell face down on the grainy earth, the place that once brought him such comfort might as well have been sandpaper on his heart. He let it out, all the emotions, all of the pain, all of the rage. He screamed to the heavens in hopes that it might provide him a reprieve…it did not. The very fact that he had survived, only to come back to a broken home, broken at the hands of a friend no less…a friend he had entrusted to protect what was most precious to him. It was too much to hold inside any longer.

In his agony, he had lost track of time, only marked by the first faint streaks of light that started to peek over the horizon. In the dawning of a that new day, Heero made a decision and left the beach and headed for his home…or what was left of it.

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The elderly butler might have looked his age, but he never felt his age. He was a spry old man, and a sharp one at that. He always arose with the sun. It was not only part of his job, but his personal preference as well. He took pride in being the first one up, ready for the day and all of the challenges that might accompany it. As he made his way through the stately manor, he decided to check on his youngest charge, as he too often liked to rise with the sun.

Making his way into the little one's bedroom, he found the little man awake and staring into the corner. Much to Pagan's surprise and dismay, he noticed Relena in the spare bed that she would often times find herself using when she felt she was in need of a safety net.

He had hoped that husband and wife would at least share their room once more. The very thought producing a pang through his heart, along with a thought he did not wish to consider. Usually Relena would rise with her son, mother's instinct and all. But today, she didn't budge. Pagan could only imagine how exhausted she really was…yesterday had been so trying on her.

He managed to pluck the little boy from his bed, and as if the boy knew…he was quiet. The two always seemed to have a special bond, or perhaps it was just his stern demeanor that let the young man know, now was not the time to yell. Either way, Pagan was grateful for the little one's cooperation.

As the two made their way downstairs, Pagan heard a knock on the door. He wasn't sure who in the world would be here so early, but he hurried toward the knocking in hopes the visitor would not ring the ancient and rather loud doorbell. As he opened the door, his usual gracious appearance did not falter as he gazed upon the man that had caused so much trouble. He held all of his displeasure with the whole sordid affair locked away inside.

"Mr. Barton. I take it you are here to retrieve your personal effects?"

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Relena woke with a start and immediately looked for her son. Her heart was racing in a sea of emotion and it wasn't helped by the fact that her son was not in his crib. Her feet carried her from the warmth and security of the little bed in the corner. She reached the crib in the blink of eye, as if getting closer would reveal him hiding beneath his blanket, but he was gone. While her logical mind knew that Pagan had probably come to get him, her emotions were drowning her logic. She bolted from the room to find her baby.

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Heero was back in his garage, sitting in his car, just contemplating the night and more specifically, what he had decided. His walk back into the house was so familiar, yet different. It felt both wonderful and terrifying to be back within its confines. Even with the dawning of a new day, all he could concentrate on was making his way to bed. Despite passing out at one point, his mind was fried, his emotions raw and his heart felt as if it had been filleted. As he walked back into the house, that had once held such security for him, he heard Pagan speaking to someone and then he heard the innocent voice of his son…but the words that exited his mouth made his heart stop.

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"Dada!"

Upon seeing the green eyed man, the little boy practically screamed the word, so painfully clear.

Heero's heart felt as if it turned to ice, as if that mere word had just killed him and brought forth a demon that lived within.

Trowa and Pagan froze at the utterance of the little boy. Then, Pagan caught the visible eye of the former pilot growing wide with shock and unmistakable terror.

In Relena's race to the stairs, her ears heard the word so clearly voiced from her son and saw the man the word was aimed at. Her legs could no longer move as she watched the grisly scene play out below her…as if she were stuck in a horror movie.

Trowa's mind reeled at the little boy labeling him such a word. His heart lurched and seemed to reject the name and all that it stood for. In that moment Trowa had an epiphany - he didn't want this, any of it. He wasn't a father figure and he sure as hell wasn't a one-woman kind of guy. He had been so trapped in his grief, his promise, and obligation to protect Relena, combined with not wanting to see her despondent any longer…he was pulled into the vortex that was Relena. Suddenly, he felt sick and true remorse fill him at his gross error in judgement. Now, it all made sense…why everyone looked at him with such disapproval. He thought he was helping when in reality, he was only hurting.

A number of events happened all at once. Pagan seemed to move quicker than any elderly man should be able…securing the safety of the young man in his arms. Heero slammed into Trowa like a bullet from a gun, once again finding themselves in combat. Relena was powerless to move as she watched the fight ensue, her body betraying her will to move forward and break up the men fighting in her doorway.

Heero landed punch after punch in his fury as Trowa did all he could to stay conscious.

"DID SHE KNOW?!" Heero breathed out through his punches.

"DID SHE KNOW?! DID RELENA KNOW THAT YOU KNEW THERE WAS A CHANCE I WAS STILL ALIVE?!" Heero's words sunk into the recesses of Trowa's remaining consciousness and then he somehow found the strength to stop Heero's advancing fist.

"NO! NO HEERO! She didn't, that was all me and I deserve your hatred for it!" Trowa spat blood through his words.

Suddenly, Heero stopped and lifted himself off of the now bloody man.

Relena heard the confession, a confession she gathered she wasn't meant to hear. She suddenly had the ability to move once more. She didn't need a witness to know that she was seething. She had trusted Trowa. The very thought making her sick to her stomach.

Pagan watched Relena walk down the stairs, with her head held high and rage seeping out of her like water from a broken facet.

"Trowa." She spoke in a tone that sounded foreign to even her and seemed to startle the men around her.

She felt as if her pacifist heart cracked and she wasn't entirely sure who she was in that moment…her emotions taking charge, threatening to break her and put her back together in a form she didn't recognize.

"You knew? YOU…KNEW?! YOU KNEW THERE WAS A POSSIBILITY THAT HEERO COULD BE ALIVE AND YET YOU NOT ONLY DID NOT TELL ME…" Her voice trailing as if the words were too painful to think let alone say. Her now cold eyes locked onto the now terrified ones of Trowa. All of his bad decisions crashing down around him like falling debris.

"YOU SLEPT WITH ME ANYWAY!?"

Those words coming from his wife could have killed him where he stood, if he didn't have the overwhelming urge to murder Trowa. Relena's reflexes were too fast as she pounced on the beaten man.

Her tiny fists beating his chest like a drum, her nails clawing at him like a wild animal.

Her voice caught between screaming and sobbing.

Heero watched for only a few moments as he found himself lost to the unusual fury of his wife. It was shocking, yet somewhat satisfying, but mostly...it hurt. This wasn't her. This wasn't her job. She shouldn't have to be the one to carry out violence of any kind. Finding his resolve, he gently took hold of the wildcat that had taken over his wife and lifted her off the broken man beneath her. His touch instantly extracting the fight within her.

She didn't look at him or Trowa, reality hitting her and she was ashamed at her actions; that she had allowed her despair and anger to get the better of her. When she got a look at her hands she noticed the blood on them and her jaw dropped in horror. Her eyes blurred with her now falling tears. She found her voice. She had to say something before she ran back in the house to allow herself her full nervous breakdown.

"Trowa, I didn't know what to say to you, before now. I honestly didn't know what we were doing. All I knew is that you did help me, but now…knowing what I know…I can't even look at you! I don't know how you could in good conscience…" Her voice cracked and she swallowed back a sob. "I can't even say it." The pain was welling up inside her and she knew she wouldn't be able to hold back much longer. "Goodbye, Trowa." She turned to leave, wanting to grab her son and run away, but looking at her hands once more…she was disgusted with herself. She was grateful that she didn't need to say anything to Pagan. The look in his eyes was all she needed to know that he would watch her son until the nanny arrived. She felt filthy and all she wanted now was to hide and take a shower.

Once his wife was safely upstairs, he turned back to Trowa.

Trowa swore he saw blue flames dance in his eyes.

"Trowa, I suggest you leave."

Trowa slowly rose, both in an effort not to make a sudden movement as well as his battered body didn't currently allow him to move so quickly.

"I am leaving, Heero."

"No, you need to leave Earth. Go back to space. So when I have the overwhelming urge to kill you, it would take a bit more effort than just driving to your house. You saw how easy it was for me to breach your security."

The recollection of Heero infiltrating his home made him shudder.

Trowa normally would have protested such a request, but in this moment, he found that he wanted nothing more than to flee back to the dark, cold cocoon of space. Space did always seem to provide him with a comfort that Earth never did.

Without a word Trowa started his retreat back around the circle drive, making his way to his car.

Heero was about to slam the front door, when he saw the box of Trowa's items sitting almost mockingly at his feet. His enmity had still not subsided, so he tossed the box out into the drive. He didn't care if everything broke. It felt good to break something of Trowa's…like Trowa had broken everything of his.

As he shut the door, it seemed to provide a sense of finality to Heero that he had not expected.

"Dada!" The silence was broken by his son's voice once more saying the word that had started this morning on such a rollercoaster.

Heero stared at the little boy, who was now staring at the elderly butler.

Pagan was shocked and honestly fearful that the Master of the house was about to toss him out just as he had Trowa. He knew he had better speak up before he wound up in the same state as Trowa's scattered belongings outside.

"Master Yuy, I feel I should inform you, normally children of Jonah's age often times learn to say 'Dada' as a first word, as it easy to pronounce. That is not an indication of the actual feelings of the child or the correct label of the person they are addressing."

Pagan found himself praying that Heero was listening and comprehending his words.

The words wormed their way through his brain and finally landed on understanding. The thought of his son thinking Trowa was his father made him see red. But with Pagan, while it still hurt, it wasn't as bad. Now hearing Pagan's explanation, he was able to breathe once more.

Pagan noticed the change in Heero's demeanor and equally found that he too could breathe again as well.

In this moment, Heero realized that he wanted - no,  _needed -_  to say something to Pagan.

"Pagan, I both want and need to thank you."

"No need to thank me for anything, sir."

"Actually there is, Pagan. You took care of my wife and helped her through having Jonah. You took care of my family and that is something I will forever be grateful to you for."

"It is my job, sir."

Heero almost laughed as he looked at the kind, white haired man.

"Pagan, I think we both know this is not just a job for you. You are a part of this family. You are the closest Jonah has to a grandfather and I thank you."

Pagan was overcome with emotion at the declarations from the stoic man. But he was also feeling guilty at his part in welcoming Trowa into the palace.

"Master Yuy, I fear your praise isn't entirely warranted. I, too, had a part in welcoming Trowa…" His words were cut off.

"Pagan, you were being there for Relena, in a bad time…and honestly, I, too, shoulder some of that blame."

The two men just stared at one another, understanding running between them like water through a stream. Nothing more needed to be said. That was another reason they got along so well. They were both men of few words.

Heero wanted to hold his son in that moment, but he wouldn't dare with Trowa's now dried blood on his hands. Instead he walked up and kissed his son's forehead. He was surprised that the boy had remained so quiet. Yet one look at the intense gaze his son held told him his son had a deeper perception of the world around him. Another surge of pride welled up within him at the thought.

He then turned to head up stairs. He needed to talk to his wife.

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**You've heard Heero's truth...wait until you hear the other major revelation. Stay Tuned!**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you to my AMAZING betas Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and Wings Landing…y'all are my besties and betas and sanity in the rough seas of FF. Everyone should check out their fanfic stories, they are AWESOME!**

**Also, Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and myself have a group page with group projects and the name is Elite SquadB. There is a really cool Sailor Moon Wonderland story on the page with many more awesome stories in the works for the page as well. So, check it all out! Hehe! #FanFicIsLife**

**Thank you to all of the lovely readers and reviewers and favorites and follows! I hope you enjoy this wild ride! Thank you again for the support!**


	13. Chapter 13

**I own nothing except for my original characters.**

**Chapter 13**

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The drops fell from the shower head as if mimicking the salt water falling from her eyes. Once again she found herself at the bottom of the tub, hugging her knees; attempting to process the madness of the morning. It had taken more effort than she thought necessary to scrub Trowa's blood from her hands. Even now, her hands were clean, but she swore she could still see the stains. Maybe it was punishment for her betrayal of the vows she took, or for her blatant disregard of her pacifist ideals? Or perhaps, she really was losing touch with her sanity? In a small part of her mind, a dark part, a deeply hidden and disgraceful part of her mind; a nasty thought lured her like a demon into the false security of filling the tub and burying herself beneath the water. The idea tempted a part of her that she had only ever visited once before…when…Heero...

She shivered, despite the heat from the water, her hand rising to physically slap herself out of her momentarily repugnant and selfish thought. She was not one for pity parties, this wasn't who she was, but then again…she hadn't exactly been herself since Heero's disappearance. Now, here she sat contemplating the unthinkable. How she could think for even one second of such a disgusting idea, her child needed her…and now…her husband had returned. Somewhere deep within herself, she managed to still hope…regardless of the bleakness spreading through her soul.

Her guilt had consumed her throughout her time with Trowa. In her heart of hearts, she had never expected him to stay. No one could ever take Heero's place, and the very idea of someone else playing Jonah's father…was distasteful, to say the least. She wasn't a fool, she knew of Trowa's past; she knew of his nature…he was not the relationship type. What they had been attempting…truthfully, had been a failed experiment before it had even begun. Honestly, they were merely two souls trying to comfort one another after a life altering loss. If she were honest with herself, she never really knew what she was doing with him, she had never been able to put a label on it. Looking back now, it all just felt like a desperate attempt to hold onto some semblance of normalcy in her life. Desperate…yes, that was certainly an accurate descriptor. How futile it was to try and grasp at something that had already slipped through your fingers. Truly, that part of her heart had died the day Heero was declared deceased. Now, she realized it was entirely possible that at least half her sanity had gone the way of her heart on that dark day. Yes, temporary insanity was certainly a plausible way to explain her tryst with Trowa. The water started to run cold, bringing attention to the fact that she had been in the shower far too long. Her tears had finally ceased, her soul felt scoured of at least one layer of filth, and even though she felt raw, she also felt somewhat stronger. She believed that now she could face her husband, who undoubtedly waited for her in their room.

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Heero made his way upstairs, his anger with the previous situation falling away with every step, a new purpose now consuming him. His mission was clear and he had every intention of waiting for her in their room. Yet, as he crossed the threshold, he heard the water running, in addition to her sobs. No matter what had transpired between them, knowing she was in pain never ceased to pierce his heart. He found himself standing just outside of the bathroom door. Once again, separated from his wife, his love…his life. As much as a part of him longed to walk straight through that door…he knew that now was not the time, she needed to process. Truthfully, he did as well, so he decided to go to his office down the hall.

Walking back into his office, that often times felt more like his dog house…the room where he had so futilely attempted to sleep the night before, it was still so surreal to be back…home. His hands absently touched the polished, dark wood of the desk. His mind instantly rushing back to a certain fond memory…when he took her over this very desk. She had one too many drinks at a gala, it had been a rare occasion when a delegate actually made her mad enough to imbibe more than her usual two glasses of champagne. He had guided her to their bedroom to take a shower and he had retreated to his office to file a report. He didn't make it too far into that report, because she soon appeared in his doorway, in nothing more than her loose blond locks, heels and pearls. She walked right up to him and told him she was Lady Godiva, and she asked him if he would be her horse. He recalled the look of lust, love and determination in her crystal blue eyes. Needless to say, his report was forgotten. The smile that found his lips when thinking of her was like no other. Yet, now such memories seemed tainted. With all he had learned, everything felt bittersweet. His heart was unsure, just like before, when they had yet to confess their feelings for one another. He had always trusted his original idea, that he wasn't good enough for her. So, now…if she had found what she needed in Trowa. The thought stabbed his heart, he couldn't think about this anymore. He had to speak with her.

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She emerged from her now cold shower, dropping her damp towel to the marble floor, walking to the sink and wiping away the condensation from the mirror. When she caught a glimpse of her reflection, her bloodshot eyes made her cringe. Her inner politician, combined with the vanity that came along with being in the public eye wanted to cover it, or hide it. But then she realized, this was appropriate for the hell she had been through. In this instance, she was actually fine with wearing her inner torture outwardly. She decided Heero should see it, after-all he was at least partly responsible for it. She took a deep steadying breath, as her mind fell back into her internal pondering. She honestly didn't know how she would convey her message to Heero, she only knew they had to talk.

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He had returned to their bedroom and was attempting to stave off memories of the many passionate nights shared within those walls. Then the bathroom door opened, and upon seeing her in her plush robe with red puffy eyes, all previous thoughts stopped cold. No matter the pain in his heart, her pain always seemed to override his, and in that moment, the urge to reach out to her was overwhelming. However, the logical and disciplined side of himself stopped him where he stood. He was still unsure of how she felt and quite honestly, it was confusing his emotions on the subject as well.

Seeing him standing there, as she suspected he would be, once again in their bedroom…it was surreal and frightening at the same time. A part of her heart urged her to run into his arms, while another part of her just wanted to run away from him. She took a deep breath to brace herself for the forthcoming conversation. "Thank you for giving me a moment Heero." She spoke cautiously, yet sincerely.

He nodded as if in a trance from her mere presence.

She made her way to sit on the edge of the bed, the side of the bed that she had claimed so long ago. Running her hand over the soft fabric of the comforter, it reminded her of when she picked it out. She could have laughed at how much painstaking thought she had put into it, hoping Heero would like their comforter. It all felt like a lifetime ago now…and so ridiculously trivial.

His voice brought her out of her reminiscence. "Relena, you have to believe me, I honestly believed that I was doing the right thing. The idea of someone hurting you, I couldn't just sit on the sidelines and hope that nothing would happen. But, I can also tell you with absolute certainty, I wish like hell I had never left. I need you to know that." He spoke with a calm that appeared painful, as if every word was tearing down his resolve to stay sane; as if the mere words threatened to completely break him.

She was taken back by the sheer emotion in his voice. This was a side of Heero she had never witnessed. The instinctual pull to reach out to him was overwhelming, yet her pain was somehow stronger. It was shocking even to her, but the last couple of years had truly taken their toll. Seeing Heero in this expression of outward vulnerability was startling, but it only lasted for one fleeting moment, as he quickly found his usual demeanor, the demeanor she associated with him…her Heero. While under normal circumstances that would have comforted her, this was anything but a normal situation.

"Trowa is leaving for space…indefinitely." He studied her face as he spoke.

She was both surprised and not surprised…that she felt nothing at the news.

She only nodded and he could swear he detected a sense of relief cross her features. Noticing her lack of reaction, it seemed to fuse together a crack in his heart. Suddenly, he felt as if he could now ask the question that had been haunting him.

"Trowa? When did it start? Was…it serious?" He spoke in pain and anger, laced with confusion and inquiry. The whole idea still feeling as if a sword was running him through.

His words, to her ears, were so saturated in accusation…it made something deep within her snap. Whereas a second ago, she was calm and ready to have a rational discussion, all of a sudden, all she felt now was rage. That rush of emotions had her striking back.

"It's not as if I planned it, Heero! Beside, would it have been any better if it were anyone else?!"

Her words were so fierce, biting, and full of pain and resentment, everything she had locked away and buried so deep within herself…a part of her she had tried so desperately to forget. It was too late, the dam had burst, and her lips unleashed.

"It's not as if you were here! You left! You chose the Goddamn mission over ME! OVER US!" She screamed as she jumped to her feet in the ire that had so completely taken hold of her. Her eyes grew wide at the realization of her admission. The terrifying flash that momentarily crossed Heero's eyes could have stopped her heart.

His body was shaking, the hatred in her words cut him to his very soul. The fact that she hadn't answered the question had not escaped his attention either. He was seeing red. For a split second, it was like he was back in Wing and Zero was setting off alarms. He could feel his brain glitch. Was it possible to drown on land? He didn't know what the hell was happening, but from all that had already transpired this morning, and being unable to sleep the night before, his perfect control was slipping. In this moment, he couldn't handle the accusation in her voice or the pure animosity in her glare. It brought every insecurity and every agony he had attempted to bury racing to the surface. His heart felt as it were being crushed.

She watched, feeling every terrifying emotion flash across his face. On one hand she wanted to take it back, to try and make it better, but on the other hand…a small part of her wanted him to hear it…if for no other reason than to understand her personal hell. This was a harsh contrast to the person she was raised to be, but she was no longer the same person anymore and right now, she was furious.

But, out of all of his possible reactions, she didn't expect to see him walking out of the room and away from her.

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He stormed down the stairs, he had to get the hell out of here before he did or said something he would regret. He needed to get himself back under control, he needed to drive, he needed to regain the ability to breath properly, he needed to destroy something. As he was hastily making his way to his beloved car, he realized exactly where he needed to go. Bringing the engine to life, he sped off to the only place he knew he could really blow off some steam.

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Relena sat stunned by the fact that Heero had walked out on her. There she was, yelling at him about him leaving her, and then he just left. Her anger was starting to rise and the overwhelming urge to run after him and throw every vase in the hallway at him was an appealing idea. Yet, just as quickly, she shook her head in an effort to clear the ugly thought. She didn't like being this way, this wasn't who she wanted to be, this wasn't the kind of role model she wanted to be for her son. The thought of Jonah started to make her feel lighter, or perhaps it was just venting and finally being able to purge the toxic words from her soul that had allowed her to start letting go.

She waited for him to come back,  _he had to come back…right?_

The longer she stood there, waiting for him, it became clear that he was not going to return. The idea seized her heart as fear took over. Tears found her as she fell onto her bed, the very bed that contained every wonderful memory of her and Heero and their love. The complete grief that took hold of her in that moment was suffocating, slamming into her like an impenetrable wall.

"What the hell is wrong with me?!" She screamed to air.

"I wanted him to come home, he did…and now I pushed him away?!"

She sobbed through her broken words as her breaths eluded her and the darkness took her.

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He was grateful that he knew a backway into the building. The last thing he wanted was to run into anyone that would start a conversation. On a normal day he wasn't one for small talk, but today…he feared he might seriously harm the next person that had the misfortune of crossing his path.

Fortunately, it was still early in the morning and the service elevator was devoid of life.

The elevator arrived at his destination, the *ding* dissolving into the isolation of the shooting range.

The solitude soothed his frayed nerves; the smell of the gunpowder calmed the rushing of his blood.

No matter how the parameters of his mission or life had changed, he could never completely escape his upbringing.

The surety that came over him when holding a gun would never leave him. Despite all the weaponry he had ever wielded in his life, his gun had never let him down.

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She woke in a panic, her mind finally coming back to reality, instantly remembering all that had happened. The clock told her it had been a couple of hours and she could sense that Heero had still not returned. It was Jonah's naptime, and normally, she would never interrupt his routine, but she was desperate to hold him. She thought she might go insane if she didn't hold him soon. Her heart felt shredded.

As she entered his room, she was prepared to find him asleep, but fortunately he was awake and standing with help from the bars of his crib. She was just glad that he was awake as she rushed forward, plucking him from his crib.

"Oooooh, my little man." The tears had already started to fall "I…I am so, so sorry." She let out a particularly loud sob as she attempted to get her voice under control. "I…I…messed up, my sweet baby. I think…I might have scared your…daddy…away." She couldn't speak anymore, she just held him as the tears fell. The little boy did not yell or cry. He just laid his head against his mother's chest, as if he knew she just needed his presence in that moment.

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The sound was deafening as bullets flew, the smoke rising in protest to his rapid fire, the sight of the targets being demolished by his expert aim. The black steel so comfortably weighted within his grasp, providing the ability to destroy as well as protect. The power and security…it all came together to bring Zen to his warring mind. Once again finding himself able to think clearly.

"You know rapid fire isn't allowed down here." It wasn't spoken as a question, since the person speaking was aware that he did in fact know this. Heero rolled his eyes in irritation. It figures now that he had finally found his calm, the braided pilot would show up. Even Heero's disciplined mind had to remind him to put his gun down, and not aim at the man.

"I gotta say, Heero, I am surprised to see you here. I thought you would be home, catching up with your wife?" This time the former God of Death did pose this as an inquiry.

Heero's irritation quickly started to rise due to the topic change. He didn't know what came over him in that moment, but his irritation had his voice taking liberties without his consent.

"My wife…as you all know…has been rather busy during my absence. I am not sure if she even still wants to be my wife?" He spoke rushed yet clearly. The anger of each word evident, his pain hidden just beneath the surface of each admission so obvious. It shocked Duo. He wasn't used to such forthcoming words from the perfect soldier. But even in his shock, the jocular expression had fallen from his face. Now, he was pissed off.

"What the fuck are you talking about Heero?! Are you serious?! You don't know if Relena still wants to be your wife?! You can't really think that?!"

The sudden impassioned outburst from Duo, while not uncommon, was not what Heero expected. His previous irritation had morphed into full blown anger now. The fact that he was being questioned, the fact that he left, the fact that his wife and friend had been sleeping together, the fact that she still hadn't told him how she felt?! It was all hitting him like a truck! No, he wasn't angry…he was livid.

"SHE WAS FUCKING TROWA!? HOW THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DEAL WITH THAT! HE WAS MY…friend…or so I thought?!" His agony bleeding through his fury.

Even though Duo could sympathize with his best friend, his own anger had still not subsided. This was not his best buddy. This was not how it was supposed to be! He did not risk missing the chance to see his child being born or risk the wrath of Hildi for his friend to fuck it up because Heero couldn't stop being his thick headed self!

"Heero! I'm not gonna pretend that I have the slightest idea of the kind of pain you're going through right now. But damn it, Heero, you don't have a clue what the hell happened while you were gone!"

Heero glared at him and for once, he noticed that Duo wasn't affected in the slightest. The pure conviction in Duo's eyes shook Heero to his core.

"Heero, man…for as smart as you are…you're a fucking idiot if you can't see how much Relena loves you!" Heero was going to respond, but Duo didn't allow it. "She was sick with worry at the one year mark, WITH a newborn AND still running the world. At the two-year mark, she was despondent, as well as being a single mother AND a widow! And do you think it was easy for her to have a little mini YOU to remind her of YOU every single damn day?! She was a complete fucking WRECK!"

"THEN WHY? WHY THE HELL DID SHE…"

"BECAUSE SHE WAS OUT OF HER  _FUCKING_  MIND!" Duo yelled and the raw emotion seeping into his voice was alarming.

Heero surprisingly found calm, only this time, it was a wholly unsettling calm.

Fear shot through Duo as the perfect soldier walked directly up to him with a probing glare.

"What do you mean?" He spoke in a deathly quiet voice, enunciating each word.

Duo knew he had fucked up; he knew his big mouth had said too much once again.

But despite that fact, even though it wasn't his place, he knew Heero needed to know. Resigning himself to his fate, he took a shaky breath.

"Heero…the day Une declared you officially...gone. I was escorting Relena home, but she had asked to be taken to the…" Duo paused as he swallowed in obvious nervousness, but continued. "She asked to go to the beach. She was beside herself. I've honestly never seen her so unhinged. She could barely make it through the sand without falling. She just sat there for the longest time, sobbing." Duo took a deep breath, clearly not wanting to tell Heero what came next. The raw intensity of Heero's glare could have burned his skin clean off. "She had refused any help I attempted to give her and then…as I watched from the stairs…I noticed she started moving into the water." Duo took another unsteady breath. "By the time I got to her, she had been knocked down by a wave and…she wasn't fighting to get up. I pulled her out and she immediately started coughing. I didn't even have to administer CPR. Believe me, I yelled at her! She had told me...she wanted...to end it, where it had all began. I mean the idea of Relena even contemplating…" Duo was lost to his own horrible recollections as his voice trailed off.

Heero was currently experiencing a plethora of emotions hitting him all at once. If he didn't have perfect hearing, he could have believed he didn't hear that correctly.

"Relena…tried to...kill herself?" Just saying the words out loud felt as if his soul were hemorrhaging. A world without Relena was not a concept his brain could comprehend. Amidst his dismay and anguish, rage started bubbling its way to the surface.

"How could she do that?! What about our son?! What was she thinking?!" His fury had him punching the wall…the concrete slightly buckling from his super human hit. Duo shivered at a reminder of exactly why he was called the perfect soldier.

"Heero, that's what I am trying to tell you. She was not herself. She really hasn't been herself since…you left."

This information made his head spin.  _His_  life had been the expendable one, not hers… _NOT HERS!_  The very fact that she would think of such an act…and actually attempt it…he had no words.

Duo watched as the perfect soldier seemed to inwardly crumble. The sight, was downright frightening, while at the same time reminding Duo of his own guilt.

"Heero, I have to apologize. I knew how bad off Relena was, and I…should have done more. I could have made Trowa disappear, for fuck's sake!" Duo seemed to say the last part more to himself, but the guy with the perfect hearing heard him.

Listening to Duo blame himself kept Heero from completely falling off the cliff he was so precariously dangling. But, Duo's words were also another testament to how good of a friend Duo had always been to him.

"Duo, no. This isn't your fault. This…is my fault. I'm the one who chose to leave. I am the one who ultimately put Relena through this… _hell_. There was a part of me that always thought she would find someone…who…deserved her." Despite the words being spoken with certainty, Duo didn't miss the despair he attempted to hide.

Being an orphan turned Gundam pilot himself, he could somewhat understand where Heero was coming from. Hell, he didn't even feel worthy of Hildi, so he couldn't imagine how much worse it would be, being married to the former Queen of the world. But regardless, this was Heero and Relena, and they were perfect for one another. Listening to such self-deprecating words from the perfect soldier was upsetting to say the least. It had him finding his fight once more.

"Heero, damn it! Stop, JUST STOP! I've got a little newsflash for ya! Before you and the Princess finally confessed your feelings for one another, I always saw it…ALWAYS! But let me tell ya something! Watching her while you were gone…" Duo shook his head. "I'm telling ya, I NEVER want to witness that again. That woman wasn't the same. She was in hell and trying to find a way to survive without YOU! So, for fuck's sake Heero, get your head out of your ass, go home and reclaim your life!"

Normally, such a speech from the braided man would result in a less than pleasant outcome. But today, his words seemed to be finding their way through Heero's anger and landing in his heart. He'd be lying if he said Duo's speech didn't give him cause to hope. But the ever present doubt in his mind was still taunting him.

"How do I forget?" The question was breathed more than voiced, as if the words were just too painful.

"Heero, you don't dwell on the past, INSTEAD focus on the fact that you  _aren't_ dead; the fact that you have the love of your life by your side and that you have a son to raise."

At the mention of his son, his heart ached. There had already been so much that he had missed.

A shrill beeping sound broke the silence as Duo's phone was seeking attention.

"Hey babe, I am on my…WHAT?! Oh shit! Yeah babe, I will be there, I promise! I love you!"

"Heero, man! That was Hildi. She is going into labor. I gotta go!" He excitedly announced.

Heero found himself both happy and envious of his friend.

"Yes, you should go. At least you get to see your child come into the world." The sadness in Heero's voice was undeniable.

"Well, buddy there's always another opportunity. Go home and make another rugrat with your wife." Duo winked, in his usual fashion as he ran out the door.

0101010101

Heero's drive home was far less chaotic than the drive to HQ. All that Duo had told him was a lot to process. But then again, everything had been a lot to process since his return. The most alarming piece of news now…Relena's attempted suicide. The thought made it hard to breathe. The very idea that HE could cause her to think of such an act? It confused him. However, regardless of his confusion, he knew what he had to do now.

0101010101

He was walking down the hall, heading for their bedroom when he noticed that Jonah's door was open. It was almost the afternoon and he was surprised to see his son sleeping in his crib. Seeing his son asleep, he couldn't help but appreciate just how much his son resembled him, but he equally noticed Relena's contributions as well. He stared at him for a few minutes and Duo's words floated to the forefront of his mind. " _Go home and make another rugrat with your wife."_

As he turned to leave, he noticed his wife asleep in the rocking chair. He walked toward her, careful not to wake her. He could tell she had been crying and his hands yearned to touch her face, but he restrained himself. He then noticed an open book laying on her lap. Carefully lifting it, he realized it was his son's baby book. Flipping it over, the first thing to catch his eye was a picture of a smiling and very pregnant Relena. She had gained just a little weight in the face, but mostly she looked as if a basketball was under her shirt. The picture both filling his heart with joy and breaking it at the same time. He hadn't been there, he had missed everything and left her alone. Then his eyes caught writing…only taking a second to ascertain that it was Relena's finely crafted penmanship.

_Week 37_

_Well my little one, it is so close to you making your appearance into the world. My cravings have been so crazy; it makes me wonder what kind of appetite you will have? You kick all the time, I know you will be so active and keep us all on our toes._

_I only hope that your daddy will be back in time to witness your big entrance. He doesn't even know about you yet. He is going to be so surprised and happy to have a son. You are the perfect combination of our love and we both love you to the moon and back._

_Love,_

_Mommy and Daddy_

The sentimental note cemented his decision. He closed the light blue book, and placed it on the table beside the rocking chair. He then gingerly and expertly lifted her into his arms to carry her to their bedroom. No matter how much time had passed, he would never tire of having her in his arms, no matter the reason. In her exhaustion, she did not wake. Instead she snuggled into his chest as he walked. The little whimper that escaped her lips made his heart speed up.

He laid her on their bed and watched as a slight frown graced her features. He realized she was doing what she did when they first married, looking for him, even in her sleep. Once again, his heart began to race as he found himself wanting to go to her and provide her with the warmth she craved. But first, he needed something.

He walked to the dresser and opened the top drawer. He pushed aside the garments hiding his target until his hand located the velvet box. Pulling it from its resting place and lifting the lid. Once again the gunmetal glinted in the light as he resurrected it from its velvet coffin and slid it back onto his ring finger. As he did, he swore another piece of his heart had instantly mended.

He turned back to his slumbering wife, only to be caught by two wide, ocean blue orbs, staring at him as if he were a ghost.

"H…Heero?"

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**Okay, lovelies! The next chapter might be the one you all have been waiting for? Haha! Stay Tuned!**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you to my AMAZING betas Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and Wings Landing…y'all are my besties and betas and sanity in the rough seas of FF. Everyone should check out their fanfic stories, they are AWESOME!**

**Also, Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and myself have a group page with group projects and the name is Elite SquadB. There is a really cool Sailor Moon Wonderland story on the page with many more awesome stories in the works for the page as well. So, check it all out! Hehe! #FanFicIsLife**

**Thank you to all of the lovely readers and reviewers and favorites and follows! I hope you enjoy this wild ride! Thank you again for the support!**


	14. Chapter 14

**I own nothing except for my original characters.**

**Please keep in mind this story is rated M for a reason...and this chapter is a big reason for that rating. ;-)**

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Chapter 14

She slowly came to consciousness, blinking her eyes, attempting to adjust to her horizontal position. Immediately, she realizing that she was in her bed, even though she had last recalled being in the rocking chair in Jonah's room. As her eyes focused and she took in her surroundings, she noticed her husband…standing at the dresser. She blinked again, thinking she was dreaming.

Two sets of eyes locked onto one another, one in momentary shock and the other in confusion. Even as his eyes seemed to burn her with sheer intensity, she still couldn't fully trust what she saw.

Her disheveled appearance did nothing to deter his attraction to her; she was always beautiful, even when caught in anger or pain, she still held his heart and soul. However, her frightened gaze is what prompted his feet to move him forward. Watching as he closed the distance between them, he noticed as she seemed to slightly shift backwards, in what one could only describe as panic.

As he approached, she couldn't help but move back toward the headboard. She truly thought what she was seeing was a dream. Then, his scent enveloped her. The unique and intoxicating blend that complimented him so well. Although, currently gunpowder was the strongest scent rolling off of him. At that realization, her brain seemed to awaken and everything came flooding back like a bad dream. The harsh words she spat in anger, the look of fury he aimed at her, his walking out, her heartache at his absence, the fact that she was the one to run him off, and the terror that seized her heart thinking that he might not return.

The fear in her eyes broke his heart, and it almost kept him from his objective. But he had made a decision and he would no longer allow his fear and insecurity to get in the way. Duo had been correct in telling him to fight for his wife and their life together. That had always been one of his greatest problems…thinking he wasn't good enough for her. He always believed in the back of his mind that she would one day find someone better or more suited to her lifestyle, position or upbringing. That one fear had always managed to make him believe that if she were to find someone better…he would walk away. He only wanted her to be happy, and safe…yet no one could protect her better than he could. So, maybe a part of him stayed with her for that reason, but it was an infinitesimal reason. No, the truth was he loved her more than life itself and part of him had always known that indisputable fact. He knew now, with absolute certainty, that they truly were the other half of each other's souls. The last two years had irrevocably proven that to him. She was his world and the reason he still drew breath.

As her mind bombarded her with memories she would rather forget…she was already reaching for him.

"H…Heero?" She questioned, hoping against hope that he truly was there and not a cruel figment of her imagination.

The warmth from his hands both soothed her mind and made her heart race.

He could feel her pulse quicken as his thumb absentmindedly rubbed along her wrist. Noticing as the confusion dissipated in the ocean of her eyes, yet her fear was still evident. Yet, despite it shattering his heart, he had to voice the words…even though he knew the answer could break him.

She noticed the change in his demeanor, and that his anger had subsided, but the tension was palpable. She could see it in the depths of his soul…even after everything, she could still  _see_  him so clearly.

"Relena." It wasn't a question or necessarily a statement. He appeared to be tasting her name.

"I need to ask…" He faltered in his question.

As he searched for the words, she already knew the inquiry that had died on his tongue. It was the only question that seemed to matter between them at the moment, both the answer and the explanation eluding her in the quest to find a way to declare her own feelings.

"Heero." She gripped his hands tighter, in hopes that he didn't disappear and in an effort to stabilize her emotions that could spin out of control at any second. "I fear…" She chuckled without humor. "Actually, as of late…I have acquired several fears." She could feel the unshed tears threatening to fall. "It occurs to me…that I have not been clear with you. I have pushed you away, declaring awful admissions in the process. While I know I needed to purge the feelings I kept so deeply buried within me, I ultimately did not want to cause you pain." Tilting her head upward, attempting to convey her sincerity within her gaze.

They always seemed to work better with fewer explanations. Words usually only complicated matters. A caress or a glance was normally all it took to know what the other was thinking or feeling. However, this time, there was so much more required. She needed to express herself; she had to let him know…not only for her sanity, but for her husband and their marriage. The intensity of his stare only confirmed it.

While struggling to find her voice, she had found herself arrested by his eyes. Still such a mesmerizing blue, just like the deep of space from which he fell all those years ago. As if the heavens had birthed him specifically to alter the trajectory of her life and the world as she knew it.

When it came to conversations with his bride, he was always prepared to hear the experienced orator overwhelm him with her inner musings. So, witnessing as words now failed her…was unsettling. The very idea that she was unable to communicate had his inner fears rising. Insecurities came racing to the surface, his mind taking the liberty of filling in the blanks against his will.

Anxiety was making an uninvited appearance as she watched a multitude of emotions flit across his face. Her voice was lost to the vortex of concerns now spinning through her mind.

Every second she didn't speak the tension between them grew, and so did his frustration.

He didn't like this; he didn't like the distance that now existed between them. This wasn't how they did things. He might not have been the best at conveying his feelings, but she always understood him, and he always understood her. The wedge between them now, confused him as much as it pissed him off.

In his frustration, Heero stood so quickly she lost her grip on him. Running his hands through his wild dark locks, he sighed in exasperation as he walked to the love seat, almost falling into the plush cushions. It was a move so unlike him and his calculated movements.

In her momentary confusion, she was rising from the bed and following him, as if being pulled by the invisible red string of fate that had always connected them. Her lips poised to speak, and as they began to form words…Heero was speaking before she could begin.

"I…I thought…I was doing the right thing. I was…so  _fucking_   _wrong_!" He practically yelled in irritation tinged with failure. "I wish like hell I hadn't gone, Relena. I NEED you to know that."

Hearing him raise his voice for even a moment always took her by surprise. It hurt her heart, but it also had her anger rising as well…it was all so overwhelming with the emotions currently surging through her.

"Heero, I understand why you left, I realize you wish you hadn't, but honestly…that's what you do! That's who you are! You need a mission in your life! You chose and ALWAYS choose the mission...over everything!"

"NO!" Heero stood in front of Relena, his eyes blazing with conviction. "That is what I DID, but damn it, Relena! I am telling you, I GET IT NOW! DON'T YOU SEE?!" His eyes pleaded with her. "YOU are my mission. You are the reason I breathe. YOU and our family are my…purpose." His voice cracked as he seemed to drown in emotion.

Her heart ached at the grief in his declaration, all the while her previously simmering rage was continuing to course through her unchecked. Although, she didn't fully comprehend why his words were causing such animosity. On one hand she wanted to kiss him, and on the other she wanted to slap the shit out of him.

Heero couldn't seem to ascertain exactly what his bride was feeling, or maybe in that moment, he just didn't care, which is why he found himself attempting the question yet again.

"Relena…he was my friend? How could…"

His words were cut off by a hand coming up and connecting with his cheek.

As soon as she had completed the action that she had just been contemplating mere seconds before, she saw it in his eyes…he was done asking.

He couldn't believe she had hit him. Never in all their years together had she ever raised her hand to him. The anger and pain emitting from her was equally mirrored by him.

He took hold of her hands as he pulled her body to his, crushing his lips to hers and she caved to his strength, sheer will and her desire as she allowed him access.

She was pissed, but her arousal was winning at the moment and she could feel her body crying out for him. His touch still set her aflame and her mind was currently occupied with everything that was Heero; his body, his lips, his hands, his scent.

Hungrily groping his way down her body, he grabbed the back of her legs, and secured them around his waist. Still locked in a fierce make out session, he walked to the wall, pushing her back up against it.

Her mind couldn't keep up with his thorough and swift movements. It was as if no time had passed. Engaging in an act they had shared innumerable times, both clearly remembering the steps to this particular dance. This is what she had dreamed of on those long, lonely and horrible nights without him. This is what she needed… _him_.

Even though this wasn't his plan, his needs had taken over. His body demanded her, screaming at his primal side to claim what was  _his_. He had missed her more than he missed air and couldn't take another moment of not being connected to her. He needed this… _they_  needed this.

Finding her heat soaked in arousal, arousal for  _him_ …it only fueled his frenzy. When her body trembled at his touch, he thought he might go insane. He was so hard, throbbing in-time with the racing of his heart. Hastily discarding his pants and pulling himself free from the restriction of his boxers, he slammed home…and that's exactly what she was…his home.

She ripped her lips away from his, letting out a strangled cry of pleasure mixed with relief at having him within her once again. God, how she had missed this…how she missed  _him_. Just by that one thrust, it felt as if every kiss, touch and fuck during her experiment with Trowa fell away. No one fit her like Heero; no one could evoke such raw intensity like he could…no one else on earth could or ever would be him. She turned back to see the sheer ferocity in his eyes, and it stoked the flames deep within her. She grabbed his unruly locks as she leveled her gaze at him, mirroring his emotions. No words were needed. He knew what she wanted and he was already thrusting into her and picking up speed. Her hands traveled to his back, digging in as she pierced his skin in an effort to stay connected.

He was not being gentle; he wasn't taking his time…he was punishing her pussy while reminding her who owned it. She loved when he got possessive, took control, and showed her exactly why they were made for each other. In this moment he was raw, wild, and intense…and she fucking loved it!

The sounds she made with every thrust had him on the verge of becoming unhinged. Being one with her again after all this time was his nirvana. Her velvet walls were so tight and hot, he could have come on the first thrust, but he needed to remind her just how well he could perform this particular husbandly duty.

He rammed into her like a piston as her nails drew blood on his back. The pain only encouraged him as he reveled in the sounds of pleasure pouring from her luscious lips. From the tightening of her channel, he knew the end was eminent. He doubled his efforts, wanting and needing to share in this ecstasy with her. Her entire being froze as her eyes rolled back and her mouth formed around a silent scream. Her walls hugged his pulsating cock so tightly, he burst within her so completely he thought his heart might give out. As her nectar met his essence, he felt truly complete.

Their heavy breathing washed over each other, clearing the haze of their lust, as well as his mind. He had taken her in sheer anger…before they had even really talked. He suddenly felt remiss, quickly pulling them from the wall as he walked back to the loveseat and reluctantly removed himself from her as he deposited her onto one of the cushions. But the distance was too much, and he rapidly sat next to her, instinctively pulling her body into his embrace. He truly couldn't bear the lack of contact and was relieved to notice no resistance on her part, as she cuddled into his side.

Her orgasm was unlike any she had ever experienced. Then again, with Heero, they always managed to find new levels of pleasure. In that moment, she felt whole and sated like she hadn't been since he left. Immediately, she felt bereft when he removed himself from her, but then, just as quickly, felt safe and protected as he brought her into his arms. Her heart felt as if it were truly beating again. But then the realization dawned on her; everything that had just transpired and how it had all happened before she could explain.

It took a second for him to realize that she was silently crying and the sight seized his heart with fear. Had he been too rough? Did she not want what just happened between them? His mind was spiraling downward like a mobile suit plummeting to earth after being shot down.

"R…Relena, I am sor…"

"No, Heero! Please don't apologize," she spoke through her silent sobs. As she turned toward him, he found himself hypnotized by the ocean orbs he had drowned in so many times in his life.

"I need to apologize…this is…all…such a mess!" She yelled to the air as she raised her head to the ceiling in grievance. She took a breath as composure once again found her, and she dared to look at him once more. The intensity in his eyes made her shiver. It reminded her of times gone by, the times she couldn't forget even if she tried…truth be told, she didn't want to forget. It gave her a rush she hadn't felt in far too long; a rush that only Heero could provide. Gathering her courage, she straightened her posture and looked at him in hopes that he would see the apology in her eyes as she once again attempted to speak.

"Even though I understand…why you left, you have to also understand, I wasn't just solely despondent during your absence. There were moments when my animosity towards your choosing to leave was overwhelming. Equally, I experienced so much guilt in regards to that anger."

The pain in his eyes might as well have been a knife piercing her heart with every breath. She could sense his pain so completely and in this moment, it threatened to suffocate her.

"Breathe, Relena." The words would have been considered a command from anyone else, but she heard his concern beneath the militant tone.

His touch, even in this tense moment, felt the same as always. Her heart raced, while being soothed in the same instance. Anger and pain melted away, the entirety of her being crying out for his touch. They were like magnets; they could never truly be ripped apart. The very fact that Heero was in front of her now proved that fact. She almost laughed at the realization…he always would find her and come back to her…he would never leave her. Her heart seized with that overwhelming knowledge. The warmth of his hand now cupping her face, coupled with their previously angry, yet exhilarating sex, it reignited the fire of their love…the love she had so foolishly believed had died.

The look in his eyes was unfathomable. When he dropped his hand from her face, they both released nearly inaudible sounds that proved they both craved each other's touch.

Despite the liquid emotion evident on her cheeks, she spoke with clarity…desperate for him to understand. "Heero, I…am sorry…I truly am…for not telling you sooner." Prussian blue met ocean blue. "I…only ever wanted you!" She said in a half laugh and half sob. "I didn't want anyone else. I have never wanted or needed anyone else. I…was just so…lonely. I was so tired of feeling alone, Heero. I missed you terribly." The tears flowed freely now, right along with her words. "When you left... it was like my heart had been ripped out. If I knew you were alive, I would have waited an eternity for you to come back to me. I was just...looking for a way to survive." She took a shaky breath. "When I had Jonah...he is your miniature replica…it was like being in heaven and hell all at the same time without reprieve." She seemed to choke out the last bit as she struggled to maintain a voice that was clear enough to hear.

As his heart constricted at her words, his mind couldn't help but recall the frightening revelation Duo had revealed to him in regards to his beautiful wife. Looking into her watery blue orbs, it terrified him to imagine a world without her. He wanted to mention the incident, but he honestly could not bring himself to breathe life into those awful words. She was here, he was back with her and this is where he would always remain. They had found their way back to one another...that's all that mattered now.

"God, Heero, I love you...so much! Words cannot begin to encapsulate the depth of my feelings for you. You're the only one I have ever loved or will ever love. It's always been you and will always be you. Heero,  _you_  are the only one who has ever, or ever will hold my heart."

If the assurance of her words wasn't proof enough, her eyes spoke louder than her voice ever heart felt as if it fused back together at her irrevocable declaration of her love for him.

"I…I was so ashamed at my actions and confused and overwhelmed, Heero. And then I was so upset with how you found out about Jonah, I…I didn't know how to explain. And…I…thought you wouldn't…want me any longer." A loud sob left her lips and her voice sounded so small at the last admission.

Hearing her speak such words hurt his heart and angered him. He was pissed at himself for having any part of making her think such a thing. He obviously had not been clear enough. Gently but firmly, he turned her face to look at him. "It appears I have one more thing for which to atone…not being one hundred percent clear. So allow me to set the record straight. Relena, I love you! You are the only woman I have ever loved or will ever love. You are the reason I am still alive. YOU are my heart and without you, it ceases to work." He kissed her with all the feeling he was attempting to convey through his words while wiping away her tears.

Pulling away, he continued… "How I found out about our son is immaterial, because he is mine and you are mine and I am yours. So, I propose that we put the past behind us and move forward…together. You-are-mine." He sealed his words with a possessive kiss.

She was so overcome with emotion, just hearing him say the words lifted her heart in elation while giving her a shiver of indescribable need.

Their previous coupling had been raw and angry, so reminiscent of their many makeup sex acts of the past. They hadn't even undressed, just the bare essentials needed to perform the basic mechanics of enjoying of one other while pounding out their enmity.

Now, his capable hands were gentle as they tugged at her robe, normally she would have been happy with his advances; but a new fear rushed forward from the dark recesses of her mind. She grabbed her robe to hold it closed as she pulled away from him. The look of confusion laced with hurt splashed across his face had her hurrying to speak.

"H…Heero, I…I have to tell you that I...no longer look the same." The tinge of red that spread across her face was apparent.

Now, his face showed only confusion.

"The…pregnancy, changed…my physical appearance...in certain areas."

Comprehension dawned on him as he smirked and cupped her face.

"Relena, your physical appearance is ALWAYS beautiful to me." He stressed the word always. Moving closer, he breathed the words… "Allow me to prove it to you?" The earnestness in his eyes entranced her, and when he captured her lips, she was happily at his mercy.

Her robe fell away, revealing herself to him in all of her glory. She shyly pointed out her stretch marks where there once was none and that her breasts hung slightly lower…he didn't see it. "Relena, you are gorgeous." He backed up his words with a sneering kiss. That one kiss, coupled with his roaming hands, provided her with a surge of confidence and a flood of desire.

She felt so hot and bothered, his clothes were too rough on her bare and sensitive skin. She grabbed at his shirt, attempting to pull it up. He broke their kiss only long enough to divest himself of the unwanted barrier and then pulling off his boxers, tossing the unneeded cloth across the room. As he swooped back down, he captured her lips, swiftly gathered her into his arms, and carried her bridal style to their bed. Their first coupling had been fast and hard. This time…he intended to take his time.

As he lowered himself back over her, skin to skin now, they both exhaled a sigh of relief at finally being completely bare to one another once more. The kisses were tender and deep. The touches were languid and soft. The feel of his rock hard manhood pressed into her skin was as maddening as it was arousing. They were finally reintroducing themselves to the bodies they had missed and dreamed about over the course of their time apart.

He suckled her breasts, his lips giving every part of her body attention as he kissed her stretch marks in reverence. At the sight, her eyes brimmed with tears and he came up to kiss her so deeply it was staggering. The look on his face was one she would never forget. He locked eyes with her and the words he spoke mended her heart.

"I have missed you so much. You are the reason I live and fight and continue to breath. You are my life, my world…my  _everything_."

He kissed his way back down her body, all the way to her center and the sight of her petals weeping for him almost made him lose control.

Watching him through a lustful haze, he looked as if he were a man in the desert that had just found an oasis. His tongue licked her long and slow, tasting her honey. She trembled.

The groan he released was primal, it had her unable to hide the further need he created within her and he had noticed, smirking as he lowered his head to lick her clean.

His warm and wet appendage diving into her was sending jolts of pure delight through her. She thought she might scream at the unbelievable feelings he managed to create.

He needed to make her come, needed to taste all of her, and proceeded to hum on her bundle of nerves.

She couldn't stop the cry of elation as it ripped from her throat and released into the air. He chuckled at his ability to still provide her with so much bliss, all the while lapping up every drop of her liquid desire.

Her mind was blank to nothing but him, the ecstasy and this moment. Finding her bearings, she looked at him, he was smiling like the cat who just ate the canary and she wanted him.

As he was moving back onto the bed, she rose up and met him halfway. He was confused at first, until she grabbed his cock and started pumping him. The look of shock on his face had  _her_ chuckling now.

She couldn't help but notice how firm, stiff, erect and hard his member was, as if begging for her attention. She wanted to suck him off. She hadn't performed oral since he left…just as no one had performed the act on her…until tonight. She missed him.

Before his brain could catch up, she had lowered herself and taken him completely into her mouth. He was always surprised that she could manage to fit all of him. The fact that she had no gag reflex was a bonus as it only furthered his satisfaction. She was a master at sucking him off, and seeing her now, combined with the sensations she produced…it was too much. It had been so long since her lips were wrapped around his cock. The image and the sounds made him explode quickly and he watched as she drank every bit of what he offered.

As she released him and wiped her pink lips, he immediately drew her into a deep kiss. Tasting each other was just another way to feel closer, but it was also a turn-on. Their hands roamed, their kiss deepened, the sounds they both made were yearning. Their need was rising, yet again. He gently laid her down as her legs came to wrap around his waist and he slowly entered her. They gave a sigh of satisfaction at being joined once more. This was them, this was who they were, this was how they worked. This was their love making at its most complete. They took their time, going slow and making it last. Every time she was about to come, he pulled out to let the boil fall to a simmer, then he would slide back in again. It was unhurried yet purposeful. It brought them back together as one, not just physically, but spiritually. Once he finally did bring her to completion, he swore he had never heard her yell so loud. Honestly, if he lacked the control, he could have joined her in the audible expression. They were both shaking with the power of their culmination…the power of their love.

They kissed slowly and it was absolute…both knowing that this was a new start, a new beginning, a new chapter in the book of their love and life.

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As the sun streamed in through the window upon the reconciled lovers and husband and wife…Heero awoke to Relena using him as her pillow…something she started doing after they married. He reveled in that moment of contentment as the night's previous activities played through his mind, and brought a smile to his face. He inhaled the scent of her hair, savoring it. He was home and alive with his bride in his arms and their son safe down the hall. He never thought this would ever be his life, and he would probably never be completely sure that he deserved it, but he damn well knew that he would protect it at all costs.

She stirred and it brought him out of his thoughts.

"Heero?" She looked up at him in shock and then sheer happiness.

Instantly kissing him, deeply and passionately, ecstatic that he was actually there, in the flesh. She knew that it was going to take a while to stop thinking she was dreaming. Despite the incredible ravishings of last night, her body demanded him. As she kissed him, she was already positioning herself to hover over his lower half. His morning desire was beckoning to her and damn it, she needed him.

While surprised to witness her mounting him, he was all too happy to oblige. He would be lying if he said he hadn't had the same urge upon waking. As she slammed down onto him, it never failed to make him see stars. She was his Goddess. As her body rose and fell, moving so methodically up and down on him, he couldn't get enough of the view of her breasts bouncing as she threw her head back while making sounds that drove him crazy. He then grabbed her hips, stilling her in his iron grip as he flipped them over and drove into her with shocking speed for so early in the morning. Her breathy moans grew louder with every thrust and he loved it.

God, how she loved his thick, long, hard cock; how she had missed him and  _this_. If it weren't for her job and son and life…she feared she would never stop. He was so addicting. How she could think that anyone else could ever compare was absolute lunacy. He was the missing puzzle piece in her heart and soul…her life just didn't work without him.

The feeling started to build with his every movement. She was close and she didn't want it, yet she needed it. She had never wanted him to fill her up more in her life than in this moment. She needed him, all of him and everything he had. She had been without him for too long and they had a lot to make up for. Her fingers intertwined into his hair as she spoke through her rising pleasure.

"Fill me up Heero, I want all of you inside of me. I need you!"

Knowing that this magnificent woman wanted all of him made his heart swell and his cock grow even harder. He very slowly pulled all the way out, then slammed back into her as he bit down on one her nipples. He repeated this sensual torture a few more times until she cried out in ecstasy and her collapsing walls took him right along with her. Watching her face contort in elation due to his expert ministrations never ceased to stroke his pride, as a man and as her husband.

White hot light took over her vision as his special brand of euphoria shattered her world and pieced it back together. No wonder she had tried to block this out…it was too painful to know such love existed and not be able to touch it, taste it and obtain it. He was too good and they were positively explosive together…they always had been.

As her vision cleared, he was hovering over her with the handsome and sexy smirk on his face that was reserved just for her. It was as annoying as it was irresistible. She brought him down, kissing him deeply and slowly as their hands roamed each other's bare skin.

He pulled away with that sexy smirk still plastered on his handsome face.

"What are you thinking, Heero?"

Reluctantly, he removed himself from her heat, chuckling at her whimper of protest, as he propped himself up with one arm, and one of his fingers absentmindedly traced nondescript patterns on her skin.

"I'm just grateful that Duo caught my distress signal and was able to find me and bring me back to you."

At that statement, a shadow ran across her heart and her face before she could stop it. Suddenly recalling the disturbing information that she had hidden so deeply within mind.

He noticed the change in her demeanor and was already questioning her with his eyes.

"H…Heero…there is something you need to know…about your rescue."

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**Whew! How was that for some sexual healing? Hope it was worth the wait! STAY TUNED because up next, it's time for Une to face the music! Haha!**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you to my AMAZING betas Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and Wings Landing…y'all are my besties and betas and sanity in the rough seas of FF. Everyone should check out their fanfic stories, they are AWESOME!**

**Also, Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and myself have a group page with group projects and the name is Elite SquadB. There is a really cool Sailor Moon Wonderland story on the page with many more awesome stories in the works for the page as well. So, check it all out! Hehe! #FanFicIsLife**

**Thank you to all of the lovely readers and reviewers and favorites and follows! I hope you enjoy this wild ride! Thank you again for the support!**


	15. Chapter 15

**I own nothing except for my original characters.**

**Rated M for a reason. ;-)**

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Chapter 15

Her eyes were downcast, nervously wringing her hands into the bed sheet, her voice suddenly failing. Feeling his eyes bore into her, she realized she hadn't fully thought this through.

Pulling her from the inner fears now running rampant through her mind, Heero's finger hooked under her chin and gently guided her to look at him.

"Relena, what do you mean?"

The piercing stare from her attractive husband was nearly enough to make her blurt out the words that she herself still had trouble believing. Yet, just as quickly, the anger she had felt from Une's admission resurfaced, reaffirming her what needed to be done.

Heero watched as an array of emotions flit across his wife's face. The corresponding feelings coursing through his body left him bereft of understanding. Then, she looked up with clarity and resolve shining brightly in her ocean blue eyes.

"Heero, you deserve to hear this from the person who started this whole mess. We need to go to HQ." She spoke with finality as she rose from their bed and headed to the closet.

Heero found himself perplexed, yet he was still on his feet and following his wife.

Relena watched her incredibly handsome and naked husband walked towards her, and she was tempted to take him back to bed. However, just seeing him there, alive and well, it reminded her of all the moments he had not been there over the last two years. All the worry that threatened to drive her insane; the endless lonely nights where she longed for his touch, and…yes, even the dark part of her mind that would think maybe she wouldn't wake the next morning…just to make the pain go away. The anger was growing once more.

Heero noticed the pain and sadness darken her features.

"Relena?"

She closed their distance and caressed his face, speaking with dire sincerity. "Heero…you can not hear this from me." The mixture of hurt, fury and determination in her gaze was sobering. He found that it stole the question poised on his lips. He only nodded as he followed her lead to dress.

Heero insisted on driving, if for no other reason than to occupy himself with something other than what awaited him at HQ.

Relena had not been in Heero's car since before he had left. She wasn't able to so much as look at it once he was declared deceased. Although, she couldn't bear to part with any of his belongings either, so she asked Pagan to cover the car and lock that part of the garage. But being back in her beloved husband's precious car, with him at the wheel, it was a turn-on…reminding her of less than proper moments they had shared in the blue beauty.

As her mind replayed a rather salacious act, her phone started beeping obnoxiously, the noise pulling her from her naughty thoughts. She found herself to be further annoyed than usual at the intrusion, but considering how aroused she was becoming…it was probably for the best. As she brought the device out of her purse, the name that flashed across the caller ID was an instant kibosh on her libido.

She took a deep breath as she hit the receive button and instantly noticed Noin and her brother coming into view on the screen.

"Relena?! Where are you?!" Zech's almost screamed through the phone.

"Brother, you needn't scream! The transmission from Mars is crystal clear."

The lightning count cleared his throat in an attempt to cover his momentary embarrassment.

"I am in the car with Heero." She spoke in an almost bored tone.

The look on their faces was pure astonishment. Relena instantly remembered that she hadn't informed them of the recent major development in her life.

Noin was quick to speak, clearly fearing that Relena had lost her marbles. "Uh, Relena…honey, are you feeling alright? You know that Heero is…"

But the phone was already being whirled around as Relena pointed it at Heero while he drove.

"HOLY SHIT!" Noin and Milliardo yelled through the speaker.

"Hello, in-laws." Heero almost smirked through his greeting.

"What the hell?! How?! When?! What?!" They were both tripping over their words only coming out as half questions, while their lips futilly attempted to catch up to the whirlwind of thoughts flying through their minds.

Relena whipped the phone back to face her.

"I must apologize. As you can imagine, things have been crazy and I've been rather busy."

"Oh…I have no doubt that you have been  _busy_." Zech's spoke with such implication, it had Relena fighting the urge to immediately hang up on him. Instead she took a steadying breath.

"It's a long story and I promise that I will explain everything soon. However, I am unable to do that at this time."

"Wait a minute? Where is Trowa?" Noin voiced the question.

Relena's face was indescribable and Noin seemed to swiftly realize her blunder. But before Relena could formulate an answer, the phone view blurred as Heero turned the phone to focus on his profile. He was focused on the road, but his voice was low and clear, like rumbling thunder.

" _He_ …is gone." The way he said "he" was barely civil as rage clearly boiled beneath surface of the otherwise mundane words.

Heero glanced at the shocked faces of his wife's family, but he had caught the glint in Zech's eyes.

Zech's voice took on a similar tone to Heero's.

"Did you kill him, Heero?"

The noise that broke free from Heero's lips startled everyone. A strangled sound that twisted into a maniacal laugh full of all of the wicked scenarios Heero had imagined in the name of retribution.

It served its purpose as Relena trembled.

"No, Zechs, I did not kill him…" he said in a dark tone..."almost…but I somehow managed to spare his life."

"Then what do you mean he's gone?" Zechs appeared to be trying to come through the phone.

"He went back to space. Considering he continued to carry on with my wife, despite knowing I could be alive…he will stay there…if he has any sense of self-preservation."

"WHAT THE FUCK?!" Zechs screamed. "HE KNEW…HE KNEW AND HE…" Zechs couldn't even finish the sentence he was so incensed.

Heero was no stranger to the colorful and normally loud displays Zechs often times exhibited. Over the years, he had honestly become accustomed to it…it was just part of who he was as a person. In spite of their rivalry, Heero and Zech's had formed an understanding of respect and mutual appreciation of one another's skills. Even though Zechs could certainly fly off the handle in a rather ostentatious fashion, both soldiers had managed to acquire a form of communication that did not always require discussion. Perhaps it was their comradery? Or maybe it was just that Heero possessed the gift of understanding the Peacecrafts? He wasn't entirely certain; he only knew he was usually a fan of less verbalization when possible.

Noin had her hand clamped over her mouth, still in complete shock. However, her husband was fuming! Relena was feeling rather exposed at the moment, not to mention a little embarrassed at the dredging up of her recent blight.

Sensing the change in Relena's demeanor, Heero instantly reached out to hold her free hand, silently reassuring her that they were still okay.

She managed to produce the tiniest smile before he turned his attention back to the phone.

"Heero, where did that coward go?!"

"I told you, Zechs…he went back to space. Honestly, it's better for the longevity of his life if I don't know."

Even though she could only see one of the two people in the conversation, Relena watched in uncomfortable fascination as Heero appeared to have an unspoken dialogue with her brother. Heero's eyes were extremely expressive in that moment. She couldn't shake the feeling that there was something hidden beneath their wordless exchange.

Abruptly, with a quick tap on the screen, Heero ended their conversation. He then gently removed the phone from Relena's death grip, grasping her hand as he brought it to his lips.

She was going to question him, but his voice halted her impending inquiry as he announced they had arrived. An uneasy feeling settled over her now for an entirely different reason. All previous thoughts scattered to the winds of her consciousness as she braced herself for the information her husband was going to receive.

Heero noticed the lost and nearly frightened look on his wife's face and now he started to worry about the news he was soon to learn. His concerns growing as they walked the well known path toward the office he was all-too-familiar with.

Relena was so focused on wanting to just get this over with that she didn't stop to speak with the assistant, blowing right past her and through the door.

Heero couldn't help but notice the shocked look on the assistant's face. But what really struck him was the unusual action of his wife; it was downright rude, a far cry from the prim and proper way she had been raised. Truthfully, it only served to fuel his unease.

As they entered the office of his superior, the memories of the last time he was in that office rushed through his mind like an uninvited guest. The last mission had almost killed him and nearly ripped his world to shreds. He'd be lying if he said being back within those walls didn't create some feelings of animosity.

While Une had expected this confrontation sooner rather than later, she had not been expecting it right now. From the furious and conflicted look on Relena's face, she knew exactly why they were here. Normally she would have screamed at them for barging into her office unannounced, although this time she knew she had to play by their rules. Heero might have been declared sane by Dr. Wallace, but as far as she was concerned, that had no bearing on how he would take this information. She had no idea what to expect. But, she did know that if she had to do this, she sure as hell wasn't doing it alone.

"Heero, Relena…please have a seat." She spoke in her usual cool tone, personally amazed she sounded so normal.

She picked up her phone. "Come to my office. Now." The tone in her voice made it clear that she wasn't asking the person on the other end.

Relena knew who she called and there was a part of her that was happy there would be another witness. She thought that maybe,  _just maybe_ , they wouldn't all die today after-all. Shaking her head, mentally berating herself, she had to stop allowing her mind to take her down such a dark path.

Heero was confused, to say the least. But even in his bewilderment, his face did not betray him.

The silence was deafening as the tension mounted; somehow making the office appear to be growing smaller with every passing second.

The sound of the door opening was louder than it should have been as it cut through the silence.

As all occupants viewed the newest addition to their party, Sally stood before them and they all watched as the smile fell from her face.

It brought no comfort to Heero as he watched the good doctor's usual lighthearted countenance morph into one of contrite resignation.

Feeling more than ready to be done with this disaster Relena started. "Une, you know why we are here. I told you before, we weren't finished with our conversation. However, by the look on your face, I get the feeling you thought I would do you your dirty work for you." It wasn't a question, nor was it a statement, it was pure condemnation. The acrimony in Relena's voice might as well have slapped Une in the face.

The pure bitterness rolling off of his wife was distressing to say the least. He could see the Commander and his wife having an entire discussion with just their pointed glares. All the while, Sally seemed to be attempting to melt into the scenery.

"Okay, what the hell is going on?" Heero spoke in a voice that could have been considered almost bored, yet the tinge of irritation was clear.

Relena came out of her staring contest to address him.

"Heero, as I mentioned to you earlier, there is something about your rescue that you must be made aware of…UNE, the floor is yours." The venom dripping from her voice was unmistakable.

Sally shivered at the glacial tone in the Vice Foreign Minister's statement. She couldn't help but think that if the beacon of Peace was this upset…what the hell would the perfect weapon do? She had never been a shy woman, never considered herself easily scared or ever needing a man for protection; but in this moment, she had never wished for the safety and security of her husband more than she did right now.

Une found this burgeoning situation to be at high risk of spiraling out of control. She had to keep order and deal with the facts. She was a soldier, as was Heero and Sally. Her militaristic mind ascertained that the only real wildcard here was Relena. She cleared her throat, taking the precious moment to collect what little composure she could muster.

"Heero, as you know, there are certain procedures…at times…that can be considered out of the ordinary, but nonetheless must be performed in our line of work."

Heero barely nodded in response, but he knew Une noticed, as she continued speaking. He found himself currently fighting off the bad feeling in his gut that was now screaming at him.

Lost as he was to the point of this current conversation, he couldn't help but notice how his wife's hand was fidgeting anxiously within his grasp, how Sally had fallen deathly quiet, or how Une appeared almost...nervous. That realization alone did nothing to calm the raging emotions threatening to spill over at any moment.

"Heero, do you recall the first mission you accepted, after you were married?

"I remember." Heero spoke in a calm yet dark tone.

Une took a steadying breath, as she seemed to avert her eyes from anywhere but his piercing gaze and Relena's accusing one.

"Then I am sure you recall that you had to be admitted due to being unconscious."

Heero nodded.

"Considering...your status, skills and... connections." Une's eyes glanced over Relena briefly upon the utterance of the word 'connections'. In that moment Heero felt Relena's hand clench into a fist.

Une cleared her throat and continued.

"Heero, you are a highly valued individual. That truly is the long and short of it. Your knowledge and skills have been a major influencer in keeping Preventers afloat and allowing us to flourish, even under the harsh restrictions that were originally placed on us in the beginning."

Heero was uncomfortable with this flattery and clear lip service. He wasn't accustomed to it and frankly, it was unlike the Commander as well.

"You're stalling, Une." His tone leaving no room for misinterpretation.

Despite how heavy the air in the room had become, hearing Heero call her out in his usual fashion seemed to provide her a type of bizarre comfort. She could have laughed...if the atmosphere weren't currently threatening to choke her.

"I suppose I shouldn't be surprised that you wouldn't be too comfortable with such words of adulation. Heero, the bottomline is that I made an executive decision, one I felt was best at the time."

She looked straight at him and almost crumbled under the intensity of his stare. But she pulled her resolve and continued.

"Heero, while you were unconscious, considering you were almost lost in that mission, and considering that you are such an important part of our organization, I…authorized...an implant that could keep track of you during your missions."

Many occurrences took place within the span of a few seconds. Heero noticed Sally's eyes grow wide, Une's stance became rigid and Relena's entire being became overly tense. The women in the room were waiting for the man to react, to scream, to trash the office. Any number of outcomes flew through their minds as they all mentally prepared themselves for the wrath of Heero Yuy. However, no one expected his actual response.

Letting go of Relena's hand, he rose without a word and walked out of the office. Relena's heart seized at seeing him walk away from her. It was a type of PTSD for her. She just sat there dumbfounded and quite frankly, she was scared; terrified he was leaving her, leaving everything. She knew that this was too familiar of his time with Dr. J. She knew that this was one of his biggest forms of PTSD.

Once she was able to emerge from her horrified trance, she looked back at the women responsible for her husband's current pain. Even as much as the tears threatened to fall, she would be damned if she allowed them to witness it. Instead, she  _amazingly_ found her voice.

"Are...you happy? Tell me! Did you think about this when you ordered the implant?"

The anger radiating off her being was clear as she appeared to shake at every word.

"Relena...I am more sorry than I can ever express. I know that doesn't make up for anything, but this was something I was bound to by orders and confidentiality."

"I...know, Sally." Relena breathed out in frustration. "I realize you were ordered to do this, and while I am not happy with you, I think...I can be...in time."

Sally could see the emotion swimming in Relena's eyes and in that instance, she found herself able to breathe once more. She knew that perhaps one day, Relena and maybe even Heero could forgive her. At least, she hoped that to be true.

Relena then turned to to address the Commander. "As for our relationship...I feel we should keep it strictly professional for the time being. While I can understand you were doing your job...your job ripped my life apart." Relena's eyes spoke volumes and Une didn't really know how to respond, so she stayed silent.

Une was ultimately perplexed by the turn of events. She'd expected yelling, destruction and having to call for backup to hold off the wrath of the perfect soldier and/or his wife. Honestly, she really wasn't sure if this was better or worse?

"I'm going to try and find my husband now." Relena spoke in a barely civil tone as she turned to leave, the fury emitting off of the blond woman was evident.

As the door closed, Une let out a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding.

"Well, I suppose that went better than expected." Une seemed to appear relieved.

"What the hell?! Are you serious?! Do you really think this is over?!"

Sally couldn't stop the words that left her lips with such force and feeling.

Une was shocked at the outburst of the normally reserved doctor.

Seeing the displeasure on her Commander's face would usually encourage her to stop her verbal tirade, but not today. In truth, she had harbored resentment toward the entire situation...as well as Une, for quite some time. Sally saw this as a rare opportunity to vent her grievances, and she took it. She walked to the chair the perfect soldier had occupied only moments prior, plopping down unceremoniously. She hadn't realized just how exhausted she had been until now.

"Une...I know you probably don't want to hear this, but...I feel I need to say it...or perhaps you just need to hear it."

The look on the doctor's face took the breath from Une. She could see how serious Sally was in this moment.

"While I understand you made a risky and borderline unethical call, I was never happy with your decision...or necessarily comfortable with it either. It has plagued me since and honestly, as a doctor...initially it almost made me quit and walk away from the whole damn organization."

The intake of breath from the Commander caught Sally off guard.

"You were...going to leave?" Une said in clear astonishment.

Sally only nodded, but she continued. "Do you know why I didn't leave?"

In an unusual display of humanity, the Commander shook her head in anticipation of the answer.

"I stayed and followed your order because…" Sally seemed to falter at her impending words. "I did what you asked because I didn't want...to lose him either." The mixture of emotions fighting for dominance with Sally was clear in her gaze. "I didn't stay only for the sake of the Preventers." Sally took a steadying breath. "He and Relena had been through so much, they were finally happy and...I convinced myself that this would be the best way to keep them together." Sally choked on a half laugh and half sob at the absurdity of hearing it outloud.

"But you are correct Sally! It did bring him back! It was a miracle that it started transmitting again! That implant is the only reason Duo managed to find him!" Une blurted out in pure conviction.

Sally nodded in agreement. "While that is true, the fact still remains that it wasn't our right to take that decision away from him. Don't you see? He trusted us and we ended up treating him the same as...Dr. J."

The realization that lit up Une's eyes was painful. As if all of her reasoning and justification evaporated into thin air and shame now took the place of her previous confidence.

The Commander had been so convinced that her decision was correct, she never took the time to truly understand the ramifications of her actions. She had started her career completely devoid of emotion, only recently discovering such feelings and allowing them to affect her. Now, it all seemed to hit her fullforce. Now...she understood.

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She moved as fast as her feet would carry her. The pull to find her husband was only derailed by the current and urgent need to get somewhere where she could expel her emotions in private. As if her body knew better than her mind, she found herself at her husband's office. They had never closed up his office, as a sort of memorial to the Perfect Soldier and everything he had done to establish and further the Preventers. She had not been there since before he left. Her hand was shaking as she reached for the handle. Upon opening the door, it was like entering a portal to another dimension...or another lifetime. Everything was as he left it, no dust was evident as the cleaning crew seemed to be the only ones who entered the otherwise long forgotten office.

Her barely steady hand found strength in touching the cool wooden surface of her husband's desk. If he weren't alive, she would have felt as if she were inside of a tomb. In that moment all of her pain, anger, despair and uncertainty came rushing out of her in the form of her tears continually streaming down her face. Even with as many tears as she had shed in the last couple of years...this felt different, it felt cathartic, it felt...restorative.

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Une had been left alone, once again finding the wall fascinating...or perhaps it was just that the wall didn't expect anything from her. She was completely taken aback by Sally's words...she was at a loss to the emotions coursing through her now. She didn't know what was worse, her new found emotions currently threatening to drown her, or the fact that she ultimately betrayed a comrade and a…friend. Hell, not just one friend...several, apparently.

Lost to her reverie, she still couldn't escape her ability to remain aware of her surroundings. She felt his presence before she heard the door click shut. He stood before her desk, fury rolling off of him in waves that hit her like a punch to the gut. Her new found guilt coupled with his rage was enough to make her sick.

"You took liberties...you used me to further your own purposes!" He spoke in such a deadly tone she was grateful that resonance alone could not kill.

"I realize…"

"YOU DON'T REALIZE SHIT!" He yelled with such ferocity and if she didn't know any better, she could swear his words slapped her. She found that she was paralyzed and could no longer continue.

"I was used my entire life! I was the perfect weapon and Dr. J. made sure that was all I believed myself to be. I trusted that the Preventers would treat me like a human being, the person they claimed I had become after the war!?" His question wrapped in an accusation caught her off guard, but it equally allowed her to find her courage...or perhaps it was her own anger that had spiked.

"Heero, I won't insult your intelligence by once again explaining why I made my decision. I have to believe that on some level, regardless of your anger, you can see why I did it from a military standpoint. As for the ethics…" She took a weary breath. "I have no explanation. I was and still am in the wrong. As for my part in betraying your trust, I am truly and deeply sorry. While I can't regret my actions from a militaristic standpoint, I will forever regret disregarding the trust you placed in me."

She watched as his deadly stare attempted to turn her soul to ash...yet she managed to move her lips before she willed them consent.

"However, I must inform you, Heero. You had mentioned that you sent your Preventers distress signal along the back channels. I feel you need to know that we never received that signal. The reality is that if it weren't for the implant, we never would have known that you were alive and Duo never would have been able to find you and bring you home."

"Yes, I realize that... _Commander_."

The way he said 'Commander' sent a shiver down her spine.

"The very fact that this...implant is the reason I am back with my family...is the only way I am currently able to maintain any semblance of control."

She couldn't even nod her head in response, she was frozen in fear of the unknown of what he could do or say next.

"So, here's how this is going to go... _Commander_. I want this...this  _thing_ removed...as soon as possible. I am not a goddamned microchipped dog! I am done being a fucking guinea pig! That being said, I will no longer be going on extended deployments. However, I will assist in any way that I can, but I will be assisting remotely. I have helped build this organization and I will not walk away, even though part of me wants to do exactly that because you honestly deserve it." The look of pure malice aimed at her was bone chilling. "I know what we do here helps realize my wife's dream...I won't walk away from that. But, from now on, I choose the missions that I accept. I have missed far too much time with my wife and child to risk losing any more. This is non-negotiable." He spoke with absolute finality.

Part of her wanted to argue, but the more logical part of her was immensely grateful that her lips obeyed the command to stay the hell shut. So, she forced herself to focus on the positive and just be appreciative that he was staying.

As the perfect soldier turned to leave, he paused at the door.

"Oh, and when you go to your precious private shooting range, you'll find the door and lock busted...along with all of your custom targets destroyed. I made an executive decision."

Her eyes grew wide at his admission. She wanted to scream, but once again the side of her brain that valued her life took control as she wisely remained silent. The irritation and anger emitting from her now was enough to produce the slightest hint of a smirk on the perfect soldier's lips.

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After her curative, if not unusual therapy session in her husband's office, she felt the overwhelming urge to run back to the car. She didn't know where he had gone, but she figured he wouldn't leave his beloved car. So, if she was in the car, he couldn't leave without her either. It was such a childish way of thinking, she knew this, but her fears were overpowering her logic. She had been through so much that she literally could not seem to keep her emotions in check with her logical thoughts. Once she reached the parking lot she was momentarily seized with terror as she thought his car was gone. Then she noticed it and the fact that it was still there had her running towards it. After shutting herself within its metal and leather embrace, she felt as if she could finally relax.

After checking his office, the only place he could see his wife going to look for him, he then decided to head to the car. That's where he found his beautiful bride, passed out from the emotions of the day. Just the simple act of finding her and knowing that she was safe was enough to make him forget about all the bullshit he had just walked away from within the confines of the building behind him. Right now, he just wanted to go home.

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The ride home was a contemplative one. He was grateful for the time to process and grasp the realities of the present, despite the staggering anger that came with the shocking revelations from Une, as it did bring up bad memories from his time with Dr. J. Presently, he found himself more concerned with the alternative of not having the implant. That would have meant dying in space after being held captive for two years...and never returning to Relena...never meeting his son. The realization hitting even harder now as he drove to them back to their home.

He carried his beautiful wife to their room and laid her gently upon their bed. All he wanted to do was join her in slumber, but just then a noise from the nightstand alerted him to his son being awake and demanding attention. He quickly moved to the monitor and lowered the volume. He wanted his wife to sleep. She had been the one to take care of their son this entire time without him. He was home and damn sure to make up for that now.

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Upon entering the room where his son was currently testing out his vocal chords, he was once again struck by just how much his son truly resembled him. Upon seeing his father, the little boy must have been equally thinking the same. The little one fell silent, staring at the man who had been absent for his short little life, yet...now...in this moment...neither son or father seemed to care. Heero's feet closed the distance between him and his mini clone.

The little teddy bear came flying up like a flag and Heero caught it without any effort. For the first time, the little boy let go of the bear as Heero brushed the fabric of the beloved plushie; the memories of when he found it, how it reminded him of Relena and not understanding why. The very fact that his son seemed to love this piece of stuffed cloth as much as his wife did...this seemingly inconsequential item he purchased so long ago...it was as if a piece of him...was always with both of them.

His son snatched the bear from his loose grasp with surprising accuracy. Heero's mind automatically planned exercises to enhance his son's obvious natural abilities. The very thought alarmed him...if for no other reason than because he so quickly went down that path. His son didn't have to live the way he did...his son could have what he never did...family and peace. His son could actually have a childhood. Watching as his Jonah stared at him with eyes that were the same as his...he smiled. Running his hands through the little one's unruly chocolate locks...so much like his own wild hair...he started to chuckle. Perhaps it was the exhaustion from the last couple of days...hell, the last two years. But he couldn't help the laughter that flowed through him. He was home, with his wife, his son... _his family_.

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Relena once again awoke in her bed. She last recalled being in Heero's car. Instinctively noticing that she was alone in bed, she was quickly rising to go find her husband when she heard it. The sound was low, but coming from the nightstand, it was the baby monitor.  _Why the hell was the volume turned down?_  She rushed to the little white device, hastily turning up the volume.

"I am here now, Jonah, and I am not going away again. You and your mother are my life and I am here to stay, son."

The words she heard from her husband could have stopped her heart, but only long enough to fill it to the brim with love. In that moment, the hell of the last two years seemed to melt away just as the tears of joy escaped her eyes. She stood clutching the device as her heart finally felt whole again. He was home, he was okay and he was staying. She sighed in relief, in a way she hadn't experienced since before he left. Her heart was light for the first time in far too long, she felt complete, whole and happy. Knowing that her family was safe, she suddenly felt exhausted, practically crawling back to bed. She wanted to give her husband and son some time, they had some catching up to do. She smiled as she let sleep take her.

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Heero tried his hand at feeding Jonah, with some assistance from Pagan. Together the two men managed to actually get some food into the mouth of the little one. Although the highchair and surrounding areas looked somewhat similar to a warzone by the time it was all said and done. Heero was however proud at the strength and independence his son exhibited when trying to wrestle the spoon from his hand. It was another moment that made Heero genuinely smile.

Pagan was most surprised at the normally stoic man showing such happiness and vulnerability. He was thrilled to see this little family reunited; relieved that the Master was home and the couple was back on the road to recovery. The last two years had been hell for anyone close to the situation, yet the current developments were like a summer breeze blowing through the frozen tundra that had become their lives.

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After the epically messy dinnertime, Heero knew his son was in desperate need of a bath. So, in addition to the first feeding, he gave his very active little boy a bath. Heero once again noticed how much joy such a simple act could bring him, all because it involved his offspring.

Heero's present laugh was interrupted by the door opening and his wife walking in on the happy little scene. He couldn't currently recall seeing such a look of joy gracing her beautiful features. It was captivating. She, too, seemed to notice him staring in awe.

"Well it looks like my men are having a good time in here. Care if a girl crashes your party?" She spoke in such a lighthearted tone, it healed a piece of his heart.

As if in response, their son splashed them both with one shot. Relena just laughed while Heero was impressed with his aim and accuracy.

He rose from the floor and grasped his wife's waist, bringing her to him as he captured her lips.

"I was just about to pull him out and put him to bed."

Relena looked at him surprised, but didn't argue.

"So, when I'm finished, I'll give mommy a bath." He smirked and kissed her again, this time passionately and it set her entire body aflame. It took everything she had not to strip him right then and there. Having him back, being in his arms again...it was too much and yet exactly right. She kissed him back with equal fervor.

"I'll be waiting, naked and wet." She giggled at the look of pure desire that sparked deep within his gorgeous blue eyes. "Your son is waiting." She laughed wickedly.

"Tease." He said as he pulled away to attend to their son.

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Heero found that putting his son to bed to be a strenuous, yet fulfilling process. His son was willful. A surge of pride welled up within him in way he had never experienced before. He was enamored with his child and he was once again grateful to be home. As he watched his son fall off to dreamland, he felt his heart swell with love. Carefully placing him in his crib, he quickly and stealthily moved out of the room.

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As he entered the bathroom, the steam billowed all around him. His wife relished the hottest showers and just seeing her bare outline through the fogged up glass had him immediately discarding his attire.

As he moved into the shower and wrapped his arms around her waist, he could feel her entire body relax within his embrace. That was something he loved that he could do for her, help wash away the stress of her day.

"I thought you would never get here." It wasn't a question and it wasn't just referring to this very moment either.

"I know, my love. I am so sorry. I never should have left." He spoke in a soft apologetic tone which was rare for him.

She turned so quickly in his grasp it surprised him.

"No, Heero...no more apologies. You're here and we are a family now. Just promise...promise me that you won't leave me again." She choked through her words.

He gently grasped her chin as he aimed a soulful look at her. "I will never make that mistake again. You are my world and I am here to stay."

He wiped away the tears that had escaped her eyes and captured her lips. That sweet kiss soon turned deep and passionate. His hands trailed down her body, finding her firm little ass and locking her legs around his waist. Neither could wait, the intensity, the love, and their sheer need was palpable. As her back met the tiles of the shower, he entered her fully and wholly...a sigh of relief escaping them both at once again being reconnected.

She never felt so complete as she did in these moments. Having her husband, the father of her child, the love of her life inside her, her Heero back...it was heaven. His love, both physical and emotional...especially in these moments...it brought tears of elation to her eyes. Nothing ever felt like him.

Watching her writhe under his ministrations, feeling her sheath him as he filled her with all that he had...it was his nirvana. He had dreamed about her, and this during his time away...there was a dark instance when he honestly thought he might not ever make it back to her. So, the very fact that he was here, this was real and not a dream...it made the reality all the more precious.

As he noticed the drops of emotion slide down her cheeks, he kissed them away. He could feel her joy; he was also feeling the same. They were sharing a symbiotic experience and as if on cue they both met that rapturous moment of completion together. The steam from the shower baptizing them in this one flash of perfection.

That night they made love more than once and fell asleep in each other's arms. They woke to a new day and a new chapter in their relationship, family and lives. As they laid in bed, basking in the warmth of each other...they noticed that the baby monitor was gone. Relena started laughing.

"Pagan thinks he's sneaky."

Heero captured his wife's laughing lips. If his pal Pagan was going to help them out...he would take full advantage of the opportunity.

**THE END IS NEAR!**

**STAY TUNED FOR THE EPILOGUE!**

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**Thank you, thank you, thank you to my AMAZING betas Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and Wings Landing…y'all are my besties and betas and sanity in the rough seas of FF.**

**All these lovely ladies have new stories out so everyone should check out their fanfic stories, they are AWESOME!**

**Also, Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and myself have a group page with group projects and the name is Elite SquadB. There is a really cool Sailor Moon Wonderland story on the page with many more awesome stories in the works for the page as well. So, check it all out! Hehe! #FanFicIsLife**

**Thank you to all of the lovely readers and reviewers and favorites and follows! I hope you enjoy this wild ride! Thank you!**


	16. Epilogue

**I own nothing except for my original characters.**

**This is the last installment of this wild, emotional and beautiful story, I hope y'all enjoy!**

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EPILOGUE

" _They are still married, they have a child and they are each other's soul mates."_

The words replayed through his mind like a sick mantra. While leaving earth helped, the entire ordeal was honestly…borderline absurd! He wasn't in love with her, truth be told...he never had been. Regardless, it had been made crystal clear that she had never been in love with him either.

He had certainly cared for her and he concluded that she had cared for him as well. His analytical mind had decided they had both been drowning in their grief; and ultimately became enamored with an idealized and unrealistic notion. Finding comfort in one other, finding release, and just finding a way to cope.

He berated himself for the way he'd handled things at the end. Deliberately hurting Relena was easily one of the worst decisions of his life. Heero had confirmed that...with his fist.

As he walked toward his apartment on L3, the thoughts failed to cease. He had always believed the only way to live a good life was to follow his emotions. Heero had been the one to tell him those impactful words, and the irony was that he followed those words straight to Heero's wife. This time, following his emotions was possibly the wrong course of action.

As he opened his front door, his exceptional awareness immediately sensed another within his domain. The silhouette of the person in his home instantly striking fear into his heart; a tall imposing figure with long white hair.

"Hello…Trowa." The words were spoken slowly, dripping with ill intent.

As Trowa gawked at Zechs standing in his living room…Trowa was now certain that yes, he had most definitely followed the wrong emotions.

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Heero slowly came back to consciousness, his blurry vision focusing on the beautiful woman above him.

"Heero, you're awake!" She captured his lips in relief.

"The surgery went flawlessly!" She spoke with enthusiasm.

He smiled at his wife, grabbing her hand, pulling her closer and seizing her lips. While he didn't relish being back in a hospital bed or being sedated, he was however glad to be rid of the infernal tracking chip.

After his initial shock of learning about the chip, his logical mind deduced that while he certainly did not approve of being a guinea pig; he also couldn't deny that the chip was what had ultimately brought him home. While he was immensely grateful, he equally could not to get over the fact that his trust had been betrayed by friends. The very concepts of friendship and trust had never come naturally to him. It had been a long and arduous road to even realizing he had friends; yet to feel so forsaken by those he had chose to place his trust...that was the main issue that couldn't be surmounted.

Just as their innocent kiss was becoming heated, Sally entered their sterile surroundings.

"Ahem. I just wanted to let you know that all went well and knowing you, Heero, it won't take too long for you to recover." She laughed nervously at her lame attempt at humor. It was honestly more truth than a joke. It was true. "I also wanted to say thank you for trusting me to remove the chip. I know this has been…"

Her words were cut off the monotone voice of the Perfect Soldier.

"Sally, we know that you were ordered to implant the chip and that it put you in a bad position. You are a good doctor and I appreciate you taking care of my wife and son while I was gone. We expect you to continue in your role as our physician."

To anyone else the tone in which he spoke might have come across as cold or unfeeling. But to Sally, the words were like balm on the good doctor's soul. She had been so surprised when Heero had personally requested her for the surgery. So, to hear him now…forgive her…it was a immeasurable relief.

"Thank you." She couldn't help it as she hugged them both; an action that was better received by Relena than Heero.

But the sentiment was clear…they were okay now.

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Heero and Relena took time, not just for Heero to heal physically, but emotionally as well. They took off from work to find themselves as a couple and as parents.

On one father son outing, Heero took his little boy to the beach… _their beach_ …the beach that started it all.

"I met your mother here. This is where our paths crossed, where it all began. It was fate." Heero chuckled at the happy little giggle his son produced upon his words.

Later that night, he took his wife on a date. They worked on reconnecting emotionally, conversationally and spiritually. Their first official date had been in his blue beauty and tonight he wanted to recreate that date. He wanted to bring back the good memories while creating new ones.

Originally, he had taken her for a picnic on their beach and this time he was doing the same. Only this time, he had Pagan in his corner, and he was happy to make some of Relena's favorite treats. Although, Mother Nature apparently didn't get the memo. As they were about to start dessert, the rain began to pour.

Running for the safety of the car, they watched as the rain pelted the glass with fury. Heero was just about to start the car to take them home when his wife jumped him. She always knew her handsome husband considered this his cockpit…the closest thing to Wing he could get after the war. As she claimed his lips, he reciprocated with equal zeal and they partook of a different type of dessert. They made fierce, passionate and intense love; her screams rivaling those of Mother Nature's fury outside the rocking car.

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That passionate night in the car was why he found himself in this current situation. Holding the hand of his wife, who appeared to have more strength than normal as she screamed in between contractions.

Watching the birth of his second child was an experience unlike any previous in his life. He couldn't find a basis of comparison or ever fully explain the event. He was completely present in the moment. Witnessing her bring their child into the world, it briefly made him feel terrible once again for not being there for her with their son. But her squeezing his hand at the occurrence of another contraction quickly brought him out of his self loathing.

He couldn't change the past, but he was here now and they were adding to their family. Heero had a family  _and_ friends. He never thought this would ever be his life, yet here he was…with  _her_.

On a final push their daughter had arrived, becoming the latest addition to their family and his heart burst with love and pride for the hollering little one. She looked just like Relena, with his slightly darker skin color. She was, in a word...perfect.

Sally placed the bundle into his arms and he thought he was having an out of body experience. He was once again in love.

As he handed their precious little one to his overjoyed wife, he was captivated by the way her eyes lit up upon seeing their daughter. He gently sat on the bed, putting his arm around her as they both basked in the tranquility of the moment. He kissed her in an effort to convey every emotion he didn't have the words to express.

"So, kids…what will you be naming this little lady?" Sally asked with her pen at the ready.

Relena and and Heero smiled at each other in agreement.

"Renee Aoi Yuy"

"Oh, that's beautiful." Sally smiled as she jotted down the name.

"Renee means born again and Aoi is for Heero's mother."

Heero once again felt as if his heart could burst, he claimed her lips once more.

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Their first year as parents of two young children was challenging, but they navigated the road together. They worked through their ups and downs and managed to still keep the spark between them…although that had never really a been a problem for them. In-fact that was one thing that actually helped them work through some of their ups and downs.

For Renee's first birthday, they held a party for their little princess and it was of course, princess themed. Even though she wasn't old enough to ride, ponies were abundant as Relena insisted on getting her little equestrian started early. Like mother, like daughter. Heero honestly couldn't argue with her after witnessing how excited she became over the idea.

Jonah loved horses too. So in all truth, it worked out.

Among the guests, Duo and a pregnant Hildi were present with their nearly two-year-old daughter Bianca. She was the perfect combination of her parents, fair skin, raven hair and twinkling amethyst eyes. She was a ball of energy and every bit of what one would imagine as the product of the German spitfire and the God of Death.

As Relena took control of the festivities, Heero watched from the sidelines, making sure that all security measures and precautions were fully operational.

Par for the course…the braided pilot found his way to his former comrade in arms.

"Fatherhood looks good on you buddy."

Heero couldn't help but chuckle at the statement.

"It certainly has been the biggest adventure of my life."

"Yeah, I can definitely agree with you on that one." Duo laughed boisterously as he took a swing of his beer.

"Glad you took my advice, Heero…making that little baby girl. Good job by the way! She's a cutie." Duo chuckled again as he raised his bottle in a mock toast.

"Yes, she is beautiful, just like her mother." Heero said as he watched Relena hold Renee on top of the pony as the photographer snapped picture after picture. When his son ran into the frame, the sheer delight of his wife warmed his heart.

"Duo, It occurs to me that am horribly late for this, but I really have to thank you. You made all of this possible. You risked missing the birth of your child to find me and bring me back."

Duo appeared to be taken aback by Heero's heartfelt confession. In all his years of knowing the stoic man, he never dreamed he would witness, let alone receive, such a sentimental statement from him.

"Man…no worries…you're my best bud. I'm just sorry I couldn't do it sooner."

"Duo, none of it is your fault." Heero spoke with all sincerity. "You saved my life as well as my family."

Duo, in all honesty, was a little choked up, but he knew that showing it might ruin the moment between him and the perfect soldier. So, he fell back into his usual demeanor. "No problem, buddy." He raised his beer in salute as a took a swig.

Heero almost laughed out loud at the braided man's shocked reaction.

"You know, Duo. I've been counting on your skills right from the start." Heero smirked at the former Gundam pilot almost choking on his beer.

"In all seriousness, Duo...you truly did make this all possible. After-all, you did stop me from shooting Relena the first time we met." The earnestness in Heero's eyes spoke to the sincerity of his words.

Once again Duo's face showed the impact of Heero's words, but just as quickly his familiar smile fell into place. "Well, what do ya know? Looks like I'm a hero after-all." He laughed loudly at his own joke as his raised his beer in congratulations to himself.

Heero couldn't help but chuckle at the truth in his comrades words.

Now noticing their wives talking enthusiastically, Relena's hand placed on Hildi's growing belly.

As both men's wives made their way to them, with children in tow, he noticed the pointed look his wife shot at him. His eyebrow raising in question.

She closed the distance between them and as usual, they were in their own little world. He didn't have to voice his question…his wife was already speaking.

"You know Heero, seeing Hildi pregnant…it has me itching for a third." She gave him a very pointed look.

As their baby daughter bounced on her hip and their son clung to his leg, he encircled her waist bringing her closer while nipping at her ear.

"You know I can't say no to you." He pulled back to look into her shining crystal eyes. "I am always willing to put in the work." He grinned like a wolf as he captured her lips.

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**The End!**

**O-M-G! This story was a beast and wonderful all at the same time.**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you to my AMAZING betas Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and Wings Landing…y'all are my besties and betas and sanity in the rough seas of FF. Everyone should check out their fanfic stories, they are AWESOME!**

**Also, Ninjette Twitch, Beej88 and myself have a group page with group projects and the name is Elite SquadB. There is a really cool Sailor Moon Wonderland story on the page with many more awesome stories in the works for the page as well. So, check it all out! Hehe! #FanFicIsLife**

**Thank you to all of the lovely readers and reviewers and favorites and follows! I hope you enjoy this wild ride! Thank you again for the support!**

**P.S. Peace Achieved will be updated soon!**


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